AIBU to be irritated by anonymous notes from neighbour?

[TinfoilTwat]

I live in the suburbs. About 6 gardens back onto ours, and another 6 on the cul-de-sac. Every once in a while I get a spidery handwritten note in my letterbox, "Dear Neighbour..." and it goes on to tell me that I have an invasive species of plant growing in one of my trees and explains how and why I should remove it, signed "Your Neighbour"

Now I don't mind being told I have an invasive species in my garden and I quite happily removed it. But for some reason it really pisses me off that it's done anonymously. Why not just say "From Bob and Barbara at number 7"??

I got another one today, "Dear Neighbour... I'm sorry to tell you that your invasive plant has come back..." and apparently I need to dig it out at the root this time. "Signed, Your Neighbour".

Also they get the name of the plant wrong - they say Milkweed when they mean Mothweed.

AIBU to feel annoyed by these anonymous notes?

Had to look up about what it is.
Seems the moth weed is really nasty. Poisonous and causes bad rashes with skin contact.

Yes, they're cowardly for the anon notes.

I'd just put a monthly reminder in my phone to check to make sure the weed isn't coming back.

I know people get very offended by anonymous notes but unless they are aggressive or threatening, I think it's possible to empathise with the sender's motives for anonymity.

How often do we read on here of previously "normal" neighbours going ballistic when asked to do whatever perfectly reasonable thing, or made aware that their dog/ bonfires/child on trampoline/cigarette or weed smoke is causing a problem on another property?

How will knowing the sender's identity influence the op's actions? Either she has an invasive species or she doesn't, if she does, she may not have been aware of it before, she may or may not care. Will her bothering really depend upon knowing the note letting her know comes from Tom & Liz from no. 4 as opposed to Linda at no. 6?

Most of us have witnessed disproportionate aggression from people who think someone's cut them up/ queue jumped/ criticised their dog or child or just "told them what to do". They may not want to rock the boat with their neighbours, who they might actually like insofar as they know them. They just want to raise the problem directly rather than either seethe or complain to an official third party. People would be even more cross about that "I can't believe they went to the Council before even alerting us to the problem!"

I do get it is annoying as you can't even reply to reassure them or let them know you will check it out, but if I found out who they were at a later date, I wouldn't assume they are horrible, sneaky people.

Yes I am assuming the note writer is old and retired.
I won’t think twice about making the same assumption but won’t say it as it seems Mumsnet are more worried about ageist assumptions than all the other assumptions & insults I observe banded about every day on this site - all the open insults I see where people are called stupid/ignorant/vile/ cowardly etc etc for an opinion they have posted. I’ve never known a site where insults are thrown around so freely. Just on this thread I’ve been assumed to have a “blinkered little viewpoint” for a throwaway tongue in cheek comment. Good job I’m not overly sensitive!

YABVVVU! Moth weed is a serious environmental problem. It has vast numbers of pods that explode thousands of wind blown seeds over the entire neighbourhood. It quickly smothers and kills native (and garden) plants and trees, will grow and thrive absolutely anywhere (even where other plants won’t). It has poisonous sticky stap that can burn the skin and eyes when you try to remove it. The pods can poison pets (and presumably children) if eaten. It traps and kills large numbers of native butterflies and moths and other insects who are not adapted to it.

Your neighbour has politely asked you multiple times to remove it (something they may struggle to do when did inevitably invades their garden, if they are elderly) and yet it is still there? And you think they are being unreasonable?!

You can bet if someone had posted about their neighbour’s Japanese knot weed bringing down the neighbourhood house prices the vote here would be very different..

I think it was a joke... 'itching'?!

As it's a polite note and meant with what are presumably good intentions (it needs to be removed ultimately and they are not wrong) I just don't think I'd care. What difference does it make to know who it's from in these circumstances, it's such a small scale issue.

To all of the posters getting snotty with the OP and saying that they should have removed it:

Now I don't mind being told I have an invasive species in my garden and I quite happily removed it...

It's in the first post.

I get that it is irritating. But as long as neighbors are quiet and I see them as little as possible I wouldn't mind. And do as you see fit with the plant.

Apparently she didn't though, as it reappeared in the same place.

I'm against anonymous notes thanks to a massive one appearing on my back fence a couple of years ago.

We moved into a fixer-upper in early 2020. The back fence had a broken panel, which I secured as a temporary measure. We were working on the inside of the house with plans to save up and get the garden landscaped, new fence, etc the following summer. A few months after we had moved in, I noticed a big piece of cardboard hanging on the fence, which said "this fence is a disgrace, the street looks like a dump since you moved in". For context, DH worked out of the house throughout the pandemic and I was WFH but I'm disabled, so we were both doing as much as we could.

DH and I were both humiliated and the worst part is not knowing who did it. It's fucking cowardly.

Start a new thread so your post gets proper attention. 😊

No, it's clear you're not overly sensitive.
And I stand by the blinkered comment, as despite several PP explaining it to you & MN stepping in to delete the offensive post, you stand by it & still can't see how thick it's made you look.

When a PP insults somebody directly, they are making a point about ONE PERSON, based (correctly or not) on an opinion on what the insulted party has said.

When a PP insults an entire class of millions of people, for no more reason than they believe that all those millions of people have exactly the same attributes & motivations, they are making a point about themselves.
It's a point they make inadvertently, as nobody likes to admit that their bigotry highlights their ignorance & lack of critical thinking skills. But they've made that point nonetheless.

I think the answer to that small-minded nastiness would be to add your own note replying: it was a dump when we bought it, but when we've finished it'll be the best house on the street. Or similar.

Oh so I’m thick now? Nice. Keep the insults coming. You really seem to be enjoying yourself and I guess you need it so knock yourself out.

I don't know if you're thick Twiglets. But it's a very ... narrow mindset you've got going on there, what with your assumptions & bigotries & doubling-down declaration that you are going to deliberately continue with your ill-informed bias, just try to conceal it better when you post on MN ...

Not a manner in which someone with a more wily, agile mind might have responded, is it?

It's also a bit rich to complain about insults, when you've just singlehandledy insulted an entire subset of millions of women. But obviously the irony of that passed you by. Whether that's because you weren't quick enough on the uptake, or if it's just general lack of self-awareness, who knows?

Wow, you are really having enjoying it now aren't you? I'm thick, I'm narrow minded, I'm bigoted, I'm ill informed, I'm lacking in self -awareness... you could go on I'm sure but wouldn't want to be unkind.