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AIBU?

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Original poster

to bin DD's present

121 replies

CanStopWillStop · 13/12/2022 23:27

A friend gave DD a gift for her birthday yesterday. It's a Christmas dress. Not particularly keen on it tbh, but I always appreciate any gifts for my kids and will almost always take a picture of the kids in the outfit, or bring the kids to see said friend wearing their gifted outfit.

The issue I have is the dress has a huge security tag on it. I don't believe my friend would have stolen it, but not sure what to do.

The tag is in a very obvious/uncomfortable place so DD can't wear it or even try it on really. I don't think I can donate a dress which has a security tag, and I feel awkward telling my friend as I don't want her to try to fix the situation by taking it back etc. It also feels wasteful to bin it, but not sure what to do without a receipt or asking for one. I've never taken a security tag off an item before, wouldn't even know where to start or if it's ethical.

Halp lol.

OP posts:
Thelnebriati · 13/12/2022 23:52

If there's a chance she has stolen it, give it back to her.

Blocked · 13/12/2022 23:54

Take a picture of your DD in it for friends benefit in an angle that doesn't show the tag then bin it.

Soakitup37 · 13/12/2022 23:57

It’s not a dress for you anyway it’s a dress for dd.

yabu by making such a fuss, all the options are there for you, tel friend/ don’t, seek to remove tag/ don’t.

I sense a back story coming…..

FatAgainItsLettuceTime · 14/12/2022 00:00

@CanStopWillStop do you have a good solid fork? All you really need is something you can put between the fabric and the little plastic cap bit, then wiggle it repeatedly till the metal wire snaps. It doesn't feel like much is happening at first, but the more you wiggle the weaker the metal wire gets and all of a sudden it snaps.

If your choice is give this a try and hopefully you don't damage the dress and can donate it, or Chuck it in the bin, then I'd give it a try to save the waste.

AccidentalWhippet · 14/12/2022 00:00

Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 13/12/2022 23:32

I don't know why this is even an issue?
Shops leave tags on all the time. You just tell your friend to take it back and have it removed. Or go yourself - they probably will just remove it.

Don't go to the shop. I once went back to Sainsbury's (had lost the receipt) and the customer service desk person rather than removing the tag kept the item as they said I might have just picked it up from the shop. This was in spite of the security guy coming over and telling them that he had seen me walk straight from the entrance to the customer service desk. They weren't very nice about it either. Basically said I'd stolen the item

FOJN · 14/12/2022 00:02

You can get security tags off with two forks. Google it you'll find several YouTube videos.

DuplicateUserName · 14/12/2022 00:05

I feel awkward telling my friend as I don't want her to try to fix the situation by taking it back etc.

Ridiculous, just tell her and let her sort it - no drama needed.

As an aside, I bought something online once (from Sports Direct) and it arrived with the security tag. I had to take it into the shop with the receipt to have it removed.

Summerfun54321 · 14/12/2022 00:05

It’s your DDs dress not yours. Just tell your friend or look on YouTube about how to get it off.

pizzaHeart · 14/12/2022 00:10

The tags are not always removed. I’ve got tags left by the shops a few times and once online item arrived with a tag.
I can’t comment on@AccidentalWhippet’s experience as I always had a receipt or email and started my conversation with showing them. But it’s certainly not a surprise that tags are not always removed.

MarieKlepto · 14/12/2022 00:27

So. . .
There's a small chance your friend has nicked it.
You don't like it anyway.

Because of this, you'd quite like to "disappear" it to avoid any awkwardness.

You could suggest to your daughter to try it on (and hope she doesn't fall in love with it), with her holding some kind of prop in front of the tag if it's really obvious - a toy, a scooter, whatever. Send pic, say thanks, quietly bin.

Or go with the hacks that have been suggested to get the tag off. They work. Wish I'd known that many years ago when I'd bought an amazing date outfit from Top Shop (at about 4.30pm), only to get home and find the big, plastic, grey tag still on. I phoned the store. They were amazing and stayed in the shop until I could get back about half an hour after they closed so they could take it off for me. Those were the days of amazing customer service. 😀

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 14/12/2022 00:45

It does rather suggest that the tags aren't particularly effective, when so many people buy goods where neither the customer nor the assistant realise that there's a tag on it, and it's only discovered later at the buyer's home.

Mañanarama · 14/12/2022 00:46

I’ve removed one with two forks before. Bought a dress for a night out that night and found the tag still on when I got home. Took a bit of patience but it worked!

ThreeblackCats · 14/12/2022 00:48

YouTube.
full of tutorials in how to remove security tags.

Find the tag that looks like the one on your dress.

I had a bottle of spirits delivered in my online grocery order with tags on. I’m not a professional shoplifter.

ADifferentKindofChristmas · 14/12/2022 00:51

I had an online order arrive from Next once with the security tags still on.

What a PITA sorting that was.

Monkey2001 · 14/12/2022 00:53

Tell the friend. A neighbour once found that a bottle of whisky in an on line shop had a security tag - it happens.

SunshineAndFizz · 14/12/2022 00:53

"Hey friend, you'll never guess what, DD actually already has that exact dress! Don't suppose you have a gift receipt, we could swap it for something else? Would hate for your present to go to waste."

SeaToSki · 14/12/2022 00:55

If its not a dress you would want dd to wear a lot, put her in it and take a photo with an artfully held teddy or her standing next to the Christmas tree with a branch in front of the security tag. Send photo with thanks, bin dress. Job done.

If dd is old enough, a quick talk about checking tags are off the clothes before you leave the shop to save loads of trouble for all concerned

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 14/12/2022 01:06

Binning it shouldn't even be an option.. ffs. Ever likely the planet is in the shit.

ChillyFingers · 14/12/2022 01:11

I’ve had security tags left on from Matalan in store and online a few times. Such a pita having to go back and get it off. Never managed it myself. Worse since they have self service tills now. Last two times I’ve been in there I’ve forgotten to take them off.

Just say the security tag is still on it, did she keep receipt? I’d be horrified if I spent money on a gift for a friends DC and it was binned as she didn’t want to ask me for the receipt in case I’d shoplifted it!

oakleaffy · 14/12/2022 01:12

belowfrozen · 13/12/2022 23:30

Or take it to the shop and ask to remove. It does happen

I bought a scarf from a shop, they didn't take the heavy tag off, I didn't;t notice as they'd put it in a bag, and neither did the security alarms go off..
Surely your friend wouldn't give you stolen clothing?

Bournetilly · 14/12/2022 01:14

Google how to remove it, you can remove it with just a knife. I had to do it a couple of months ago when it wasn’t removed in store.

If not just tell your friend, at least you can donate it to charity that way and it’s not fully wasted.

AlwaysFullOfQuestions22 · 14/12/2022 01:15

Its easy to get a tag off.!
Ive done a few times... Im looking at you jd sports! Because im not travelling 45 min paying to park taking the kids through town to get it removed.

Pair or snips /wire cutters and done in 30 seconds.

GLADragss · 14/12/2022 01:16

Don’t try and take it off yourself. Just return it to your friend. This is the one circumstance where it’s okay to return a gift.

Greybutterfly · 14/12/2022 01:18

Explain the tag is on and ask for the receipt. Then return / exchange the dress for something else

BungleandGeorge · 14/12/2022 01:20

Of you try and leave with a tag on doesn’t the alarm usually go off in the shop? I’ve had them left on online orders which is a pita!