To find it crazy that some people actually have a CLEAR mind?!

[onestepps]

I'm just finished following one of my therapy sessions for my anxiety disorder. I have explained the things I struggle with and how I feel as though I have a constant trail of worries in my mind 24-7. I don't feel like my brain ever actually STOPS! It's one thing after another.

Obviously I realise this isn't necessarily normal, but of course nobody really knows what is.

But I find it amazing to think that there are people out there that wake up, go about their day, and go home etc with absolutely no worries in their minds at ALL! This just sounds foreign to me, I would love to experience a day like that!!

That's all really! I suppose I'd never imagined it but it's a possibility! I hope one day I'm able to experience it

I agree OP I often have the same thought - I hope your therapy is going well

I doubt anyone on this planet goes through life, or even days, worry free. Some people can control those thoughts, rationalise them, chase them away, work through them, ignore them, put them to one side to be dealt with later, see them for the the non important distractions they are etc etc.

We all have them to some extent, but some people can kind of glide past them

Think of your brain as a muscle, you have to train it to be at peace. That’s basically what mindfulness and mediation are.

it also gets full, so needs emptying regularly through processes such as therapy, talking, sharing, rage relief, dance, movement etc.

I’ve gone from having a non stop mind and negative talk to having a (generally!) peaceful quiet mind and I have to say it’s bliss!

I don't think anyone is free from worry. I know some people can put things out if their minds or think of nothing at all. Amazing

I know exactly what you mean - I've just finished therapy recently and can honestly say that some days it hits me that I don't have to worry about anything! It's such a good feeling, I hope you get to that point too.

Do they really exist though?

I'd consider myself quite healthy mentally wise, however my brain keeps scanning things to worry about, that's what brains have been doing for the last hundred thousand years and what kept us alive as a species.

What may differ is how people react to worries.

I don't think I'm as easy a case as perhaps my therapist thinks. I have so many worries and continuous thoughts it's effecting every aspect of my life. I have no attention span whatsoever and easily drift out of a conversation without realising how much I've missed until it's too late. My work is being effected as I'm such a scatterbrain and have an absolutely terrible memory.. I feel like from the moment I open my eyes to the minute I fall asleep my brain is just mentally active and I'm starting to really feel the affect of it now. I'm so deeply unhappy and stressed and just don't think I could ever see myself getting better. 😟

Compartmentalise. Put distractions away in a mental box and store that in the back of your mind. Then prioritise what is important and focus on that. I have to have a clear head to do what I do. Ppl will die otherwise.

Ive been reading about ADHD as my DD has just been diagnosed and what you’ve written sounds similar to what’s described in females presenting with ADHD. Maybe worth a look?

@Winbourneflight yes, I've had a little read about it recently as it seems to resonate with me and my 'symptoms' for lack of better word. I just think sometimes it would be SO lovely to sleep for a year or so and wake up worry free and refreshed!

My mind is a mix at times, usually running over different perspectives and strategies.
Usually I just talk to the kettle , much cheaper than a therapist, and any psychological issues,.I can research in a psychological textbook

You could have been describing me two years ago. I eventually started therapy and then antidepressants and I feel much better. I still have problems but I’ve learned to rationalise them and choose how much energy something is worth spending on. How long have you been seeing your therapist? It took me a (long) while but I’m seeing light again and managing to find pleasure in some things. You’ll get there too OP.

i have anxiety and my brain feels like it’s on a treadmill.

I do have anxiety / anti depressant medication but I'm terrible at taking it. My mind is in overdrive so often that I honestly just forget it. Then I remember and think 'tomorrow I'll start' and then never end up doing it. I don't remember even the simplest things like taking those. Stupid really!

My mind is never ever clear as I have ADHD but it is not usually worries that fill it. Usually music and random wonderings. Yes, also worries at times but not all the time.

Sorry you are struggling, I hope you can find some strategies that work for you. Meditation is supposed to be very helpful. I can clear my mind doing that but it feels a bit like whack-a-mole. Apparently it gets easier the more you do it.

Every brain has a worry hole that is like a vacuum that must be filled. When a worry vacates the hole another is sucked straight in. Science.

I have a regular catch up with a friend where we play 'what's in your worry hole' and we share the thing that is niggling away at us at that point.

I have a small black jewellery box and I imagine myself putting my worries into it at night. I won’t forget them or overlook them—they’ll be there in the morning when I can think more clearly.

This is really interesting!
I have CONSTANT music playing in my mind. Literally 24/7. I actually wake up with a song in my head before I've even thought about / done anything else!

I get you, OP. I could not turn off my thoughts, ever. I was one big tense ball of stress over the smallest of things. Even going shopping for clothes for myself/windows hop would stress me out, and I used to do it pre-children to unwind. DH urged me to talk to my GP, and oh my giddy aunt, the difference a few weeks on anti-dep/anxiety medications makes is just astounding. I felt normal, like I could think about something, make a plan, and then put it aside instead of the constant rumination.

I don't think many people drift through life without worries tbh. Some people manage to successfully compartmentalise it and find strategies.

I've got ADHD, Dysoraxia, and was diagnosed with major depressive disorder at the age of 16 (early 30s now). Despite this I often read the posts on here and feel I'm managing much better than many.

The key for me is exercise and enough sleep as without them I'll always come unstuck. I do speculate that the reason I've been relatively unfazed by lockdown etc is because even when things were 'good' by most people's standards I could still be sitting there on a beautiful sunny day feeling shite despite not really being able to think of a single reason why I shouldn't be happy.

I got out of office work about five years ago (often a stressful environment IMO) and I'm in the best shape of my life after having a blip over lockdown. It may be an odd perspective but to me it matters little how objectively 'good' things were a couple years back when I wasn't happy myself back then. I generally struggle to feel happy if I feel unhealthy and don't like how I look.

I defo feel far happier than a few years back.

I am also absolutely terrible at making decisions as well. I crumble at the thought of having to reply to someone asking to make plans, or having to be the decision maker. It stresses me out beyond belief! And then I seem to get really down and angry at myself for the way I felt. It's a cycle isn't it! One big messy one! 🫤😂

ADHD can be rooted in trauma which can be addressed through therapy (read Dr Gabor Maté) so don’t be too quick to self diagnose.

I’ve experienced anxiety and also the clearness of mind that’s come with lots of therapy so I know it’s possible to heal your thoughts! Keep going in therapy and become aware of your thoughts - it’s a bit of a terrifying moment when you become aware of new things about yourself but even just awareness and practicing compassion towards yourself can bring so much insight and peace.

I am 3 sessions in at the moment, and so Im not quite at the stage where we have a solid plan and way to move forward yet. I'm still explaining my thoughts and feelings etc.

I did have an extremely traumatic event happen in my life when I was just 11 years old. I don't want to go into detail here but it was absolutely awful, and completely life changing. I am hoping I'll soon have a clear strategy.

Slightly off topic but I read recently that many people don't have an inner voice. My brain is chatting away to me constantly. It's not voices I can hear. It's my talking to myself in my mind. I thought everybody did that but apparently some people are completely clear minded !