to be annoyed that a stranger lined my children up and took their picture in the park without asking permission?

[IlanaK]

In Regent's park today with a friend. Three boys all way ahea dof us on the path scootering. A group of tourist men lined them up with the stream and trees as backdrop and took their phot before we could get to them.

They got a right telling of from me though.

Was I being unreasonable?

I ask because some Japanese tourists ( not all men) wanted to take ds and friends picture once, can't remember where we were though

yup I have had Japanese tourists take ds's picture several times (without asking) so I am surprised to hear someone say it is culturally taboo in Japan?

I don't think it's a big deal really - where's the harm? British tourists in places like Thailand often take photos of cute local kids too.

They were not Japanese. They looked middle eastern.

Now to be clear, I have no doubt that they were just innocent tourists. And my mind did not at all think "peadophile" when I saw them or even later.

I just think it is rude to not ask permission. As was mentioned earlier, they did not just take a picture in which the children happened to be in shot. They actually lined the children up in a row and took THEIR picture. You would never do this to an adult so why is ok to do it to children?

The boys in question are aged 3, 4 and 6. I am not sure if they were asked if they wanted their photo taken or not, but surely with such young children, common sense would say look for the responsible adult and ask first.

IlanaK, I am with you on this. It was rude, and they were not old enough to give their own consent.

But tbh this gasping and angsting about 'Peadophiles' leaves me very sceptical.

FWIW, when I was with my sister and nephew (2) in Portugal about 8 years ago, an older Portuguese man rushed up to nephew in his pushchair and gave him a big smacking kiss! No paedophilia involved, just a celebration of how lovely children can be. The same welcoming and celebratory feelings towards children were evident everywhere. Not the suspicious, resentful attitude to children and equally suspicious grudging response to friendly adults we have in our society.

well, that's the feeling i get when so many photographs of starving children are taken all over the world without their parents permissions.

I think YABU, it's a public place
Next time keep them closer to you perhaps

I think perhaps we have become a bit sensitive to it here, as there is a halfway house for child sex offenders not many miles up the road and they are often spotted around our beach area. I wouldn't want to suggest everyone taking photos of children are paedophiles, not at all. I'm just of the opinion that it's rude not to ask... no gasping and angsting here

IlanaK -yanbu if it upset you or made you feel uncomfortable, go with your instincts. Your children - your call

Message withdrawn

Hang on - I know I'm going to regret asking this - but what harm exactly can be caused by a stranger taking a child's photograph?

And if the FBI look on carrying a camera as a sign of potential paedophilia then they are making a lot of work for themselves!

I don't think it is particularly harmful, but it is rude not to ask, especially if they are posed pictures. But if someone asked nicely and said nice things about the kids I wouldn't be saying no I don't think (sadly no one has ever asked!).

When we were in Japan had loads of people take pics of me and ds. (some asked, some didn't) Noticed a guy with a huge zoom lens once after dh and I were having little kiss and cuddle in a big park -thought it was private -yuk! he really ran away fast when I approached him!!

surely the harm caused - is that the mum is upset.that in itself constitutes harm

YANBU at all. I personally hate having my picture taken. I would never dream of taking a picture of someones child, I mean what do you want a picture of a strange child for anyway.

This country is a freakin' camera culture these days, cameras everywhere.

Its bloody big brother.

YANBU. they should have asked your permission.

"Someone - harmless-looking older couple - took a picture of ds1 once when we were in the botanic garden (because he was so 'sweet' and 'lovely' and the way he was pretending to water the plants made them laugh). I made them delete it."

Good grief. What an outburst of utter, gibbering paranoia this thread is producing. What the hell is going to happen as a result of a photograph?

This news just in, folks - cameras don't steal souls.

It wouldn't bother me. I don't like the assumption that peadophiles are looking at photos of fully dressed children in public parks rather than videos and live feeds of violent sexual asaults.

I agree, I think this thread demonstrates a really sad level of paranoia.

It wouldn't bother me. It would bother me if someone hurt, frightened, abused or was in any way nasty to my child. But took their photo? Er, no.

you're all paranoid.

i think its sad that every male probably has to think about what they are doing in every aspect of their life. my dh when we first got dd was really nervous about cleaning her when she had had a poo. i said you are her dad do it, but he was still very consious.

we have builders in our house at the moment, i am constantly worried where dd is.99.9% of men arnt like this, but its a big concern.

Er, can you actually tell us, or did you tell the men, what the problem is with the photo taking?

I mean... a photo...really really really...how on earth can a photo be construed as suspicious, or potentially suspicious, or potentially abusive or... WHAT EXACTLY?

I think you are being totally unreasonable.

Ladies you are being terribly naive if you think this is harmless!! (hopefully it is but......)

Lining up children purposefully (having made sure the accompanying adult had been left behind) & taking shots then leaving very rapidly before the said adult could catch up & have a friendly chat?

The comments about them being fully clothed made me laugh- (sorry OP to say this ) have you never heard of cutting & pasting? The laughing heads of innocent children appear on the tortured bodies of other innocents to make it appear they are enjoying the horrific stuff happening to them.

Sadly all too often-ask any officer on Operation Ore & other projects.

I heard somewhere that if we're out and about in a UK town or city we're cought on cctv cameras on average 600 times. Presumably if our kids are out they are too?

The polite thing would be to ask, but people forget to be polite sometimes.

DS has had his picture taken many times while on our travels abroad, althugh they did always ask first!

anyone can take a photo of your child and cut and paste it, this can happen on a street, school, anywhere. Have you never heard of a zoom lense? You wouldn't even know about it.

The fact is that your child is NOT being exposed to anything harmful by having his/ her photo taken while fully clothed in the presence of his or her parents. I am presuming none of you have photos anywhere on the internet then? Why would someone want to go to the trouble of putting your child's face onto the body of another child? It's the child whose body is being used that is due all this concern anyway.

Please stop being quite so paranoid - it is highly likely that the tourists wanted some pics of 'brit kids' and if not, then hey - you're never going to see them anyway. God help you when your kids start building their own webpages!