Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask DS to swap his advent calendar with his brother?

46 replies

thn215m · 07/12/2022 15:23

Both children have advent calendars. Eldest has a milkybar one and youngest has a normal dairy milk. I bought them both and they chose which they wanted, I was expecting eldest to choose the dairy milk but he didn't.

He is a picky eater due to feeling sick with certain foods, last year he had a non chocolate advent calendar but he asked for a chocolate one this year. Anyway, since last week he's started feeling sick after eating his chocolate at first I thought maybe as it was the first thing of the day he'd eaten but today he had toast then his chocolate and he still felt sick. He's said he's going to give it to his brother but I'm not sure I want him to have 2 so WIBU to ask DS2 to swap?

OP posts:
MrsWooster · 07/12/2022 15:25

Yabu. Buy him another.

ElbowsandArses · 07/12/2022 15:26

Yes. Agree w PP.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 07/12/2022 15:26

Yes why not just buy another one?

MrsTerryPratchett · 07/12/2022 15:26

Bless him. I'd say just leave it if he's fine. No one needs chocolate and he doesn't sound bothered.

MolesOnPoles · 07/12/2022 15:26

No, don’t ask. It would be sending a clear message that one is more important than the other.

Ellie1015 · 07/12/2022 15:26

I would let the other child have the choice to swap or keep their own. Hopefully chooses to swap. Definitely not having both though, you can have it if they want to stick with original one.

ChildrenOfTheQuorn · 07/12/2022 15:27

MolesOnPoles · 07/12/2022 15:26

No, don’t ask. It would be sending a clear message that one is more important than the other.

Exactly. This will come across as favouritism

Ellie1015 · 07/12/2022 15:30

ChildrenOfTheQuorn · 07/12/2022 15:27

Exactly. This will come across as favouritism

I think as long as it is a genuine choice it isn't favouritism. Have to word it carefully though so ds2 doesn't feel obligated to swap.

RunLolaRun102 · 07/12/2022 15:32

He’s fine to go without chocolate so why ask your youngest to swap?

girlmom21 · 07/12/2022 15:37

RunLolaRun102 · 07/12/2022 15:32

He’s fine to go without chocolate so why ask your youngest to swap?

Exactly this.

Notanotherusername4321 · 07/12/2022 15:39

Don’t ask to swap. My mum used to do this, and often swapped anyway if I didn’t want to.

it’s horrible. Clear message that gifts are not given in good faith.

aSofaNearYou · 07/12/2022 15:42

You could ask DS2 if he wants to if you got the impression he'd actually prefer Milky Bar but I wouldn't take it further than that if he says no. You have the Milky Bar one rather than giving him two.

ReachedTheEndofCake · 07/12/2022 15:43

Have you tried him having his chocolate in the evening or after school? It could just be too early in the day for chocolate.

Relocatiorelocation · 07/12/2022 15:44

Why swap though? If chocolate is making him sick then just remove the chocolate from the equation.

Beees · 07/12/2022 15:47

Relocatiorelocation · 07/12/2022 15:44

Why swap though? If chocolate is making him sick then just remove the chocolate from the equation.

Exactly. It's such an odd thing to consider doing when it's the chocolate making him feel sick. He's not going to feel elss sick just because it's a different type of chocolate. I'm sure he will be fine just opening the doors and someone else can eta his chocolates.

GaggleOfSwans · 07/12/2022 15:55

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

MichelleScarn · 07/12/2022 15:58

Who chose first? Did you let ds1 chose first to satify his pickiness?
Does non picky child frequently go 2nd or have to accommodate his brother?

Mariposista · 07/12/2022 16:02

He doesn't need the chocolate. Get him to give it to someone else if it makes him feel ill. Either a pal at school or his brother.
And don't let them eat chocolate first thing in the morning. Enough to make anyone feel sick

alasangne · 07/12/2022 16:02

Has anyone seen a chocolate advent calendar for sale at the moment all the shops I've been in are sold out.

icecoffeeisland · 07/12/2022 16:03

MrsWooster · 07/12/2022 15:25

Yabu. Buy him another.

She'd be very lucky to find an advent calendar on the 7th of December. I searched all my local supermarkets for a chocolate advent calendar on the 1st of December, and could only find one (pretty expensive) one in M&S.

takealettermsjones · 07/12/2022 16:07

It reads as though you gave your eldest the first choice about which one he wanted, so your youngest had to have the other one. If that's the case, making the youngest now give up his calendar to his brother (regardless of whether he's getting one in return) would add insult to injury. You're being hugely unreasonable imo.

AriettyHomily · 07/12/2022 16:09

Just get another one. Massively unfair to ask him to swap when you asked him to chose in the first place.

paintitallover · 07/12/2022 16:11

YABU

MillyMollyManky · 07/12/2022 16:14

Yabu. Why should he swap, and why assume that doing so would solve the problem?

Get a picture one.

Invernessy · 07/12/2022 16:14

Not advent calendar related really but is he getting the sickness looked into? Sounds a bit worrying if something like a small chocolate is making him ill. Hope you find out what’s causing it.