to wonder how does she do it?

[Comedycook]

So last week, I had to go round to a friend of a friend's house to pick something up. I'd never been there before. She has two teenage kids and a preteen. I have two DC 12/14. Her house was immaculate. I don't just mean clean and tidy, I get that. Lots of people are like that. I keep my house clean enough. But I mean not a single sign that her kids lived there apart from photos on the walls. Admittedly I stayed downstairs and didn't venture up...but nothing that would make you know that she had kids. So right now if I go down to my hallway, theres a hairband and gloves on the table in my hallway. Or my Ds hoodie hanging over a chair. In the kitchen, my ds sliders are by the back door. My DD loves drawing, so there may be a drawing and pack of pens on the side. There's usually a phone charger laying around. How does she do it? My only thought was she never ever sits down! Are other people like this? Zero signs of kids in a house with kids? I'm not a hoarder and try to keep my house in reasonable order but if you came round, there are things laying around that would make you know kids/teens live here.

I have a friend like this, she is very organised and even as children her room was immaculate as was their home. When she married her home was the same. Everything gets put away and cleaned up before they move on to the next thing, it’s a routine, she is not constantly busy.

When she had her first child me and another childhood friend were driving over to see her and laughing with each other with the thought that her home would now be as chaotic as ours.

We walked in to an immaculate home with the baby sleeping in the colour coordinated pram in the corner of the room. She laughed when we told her we were so disappointed that she was still nailing it.

Shes still the same and for the fifty odd years that I’ve known her, her home has always been happy. (And immaculate)

I would properly love it if someone followed me round my house putting everything back into its actual place.

Was it Friday tea time you went round? Maybe the cleaners had been in for hours that day!! And if you went back Monday morning it would be just like yours.

I have a friend like this but she had never liked ‘child clutter’, as soon as her kids were school age she stopped letting them have toys or anything out of their bedrooms. There is absolutely no child clutter downstairs and she is very strict with her kids about mess. Her kids seem happy though, they all get along really well as a family and are very close. I think her kids are probably happier than my own messy kids! I think it makes a big difference that my friend loves cleaning and having a perfect beautiful house is like a hobby for her and she gets a lot of enjoyments from it.. I just get cleaning rage when I try to keep my house tidy.

Oh good grief! You want to see my place - and my children have left home!

I paint, so there are art materials everywhere; I sing and run a choir, so there are piles of music everywhere. I design publicity for various organisations, so there are proofs everywhere. It's great! I know where everything is, which is hard for others to believe.

I design publicity for various organisations, so there are proofs everywhere.

My neighbour is ultra-tidy and she takes a deep breath as she comes in through the door!

I could not be happy in an immaculate home. When the children were here it was even jollier chaos: books, paintings, clothes, toys, craft projects in progress - wonderful!!

Soooo…this was my mum’s house growing up.

1. Note, I called it my mum’s house, not my home. I was told on an almost daily basis that until I paid bills I had to keep it as she liked it - it was not mine to do with, even my room. Had to be spotless at all times.
2. She cleaned every day. Everything had a place. Everything must remain in its place.
3. I cleaned every day. There were always chores. Every night after school there were different rooms to be dusted and chamois leathered (all items removed from surfaces, dusted and put back). Including skirting boards and architraves (dust isn’t only at your eyeline). Hoovering too. Bathroom done fully three times a week, as well as the bath cleaning after every bath. I’m 40 and only just stopped manically polishing the glass concertina shower doors and taps etc after a shower at hers (before actually drying myself too). Sofas were hoovered out every day and the cushions for each side swapped over. When we were having major renovation works done for a period of 8 months or so when I was a teenager, she made us move all the furniture and knick knacks every morning and then every evening clean the whole house top to bottom and put it all back to stage it like a perfect house again. When we were having plastering/electrics hanging down/flooring done etc. It. Was. Nuts.
4. We just visited this weekend and she asked that we hop on one leg outside while taking our shoes off in the rain so ‘we don’t step on the doormat in our shoes’. We hadn’t been anywhere muddy, just sat in a car and our shoes were dry. We weren’t raised in a barn - we’d always take our shoes off on a doormat in anyone’s house, not walking onto the flooring to do so. The doormat was on stone tiles, so not like we’d have messed up carpet even if we did.
5. She doesn’t have OCD, in any way - she does, however, have a huge fear of judgement. The idea of someone seeing it with something out of place is an abiding terror…even though the only people who visit her are us and my brother.

Tl;dr - I pity her poor kids. And I really hope that she’s saving into a therapy fund for them 😂😂😂

She will have a place for everything and have trained her family to put things where they belong. All things.
Her family would no sooner remove their hairband and put it on the side instead of the...hair band holder thingy (?) than you would leave your muddy wellies on your bed.

Also…my house is a tip now. Clean, but piles of books/craft projects/birthday cards I haven’t put in the loft yet/notes for my next book/boardgames we want to play/things we’ve ordered but not found a home for/different terrain running shoes by the back door…just, stuff. My mum and aunt both have that tight-lipped sniffiness when they come round here! But, y’know, we actually have a life and hobbies and friends that I consider more important than staying in and polishing the light switches (yes, that was a real job too 😁).

My house is super tidy downstairs. It's just because that's how I like it. Mess stresses me out and I can't relax properly. I don't try particularly hard, but the DC have never really left stuff lying around and I don't either.

Their bedrooms on the other hand, complete hovels 😂