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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Am I overreacting to Strep A ?

80 replies

glugluggg · 04/12/2022 10:17

I have a three year old in nursery and 7 month old baby at home.

Both have been off nursery / crèche for going onto the third week now, as they both came down with illness around three weeks ago.

Now with the strep A thing, I'm considering staying home with both of them and avoiding crèche, nursery, softplay, play groups, play dates until the new year.

I'm on Mat leave, so I can do this. It's tough on me and I'm already exhausted, having them home all the time already for two weeks. But I am really worried about them getting really sick.

Is this OTT ?

OP posts:
Original poster
glugluggg · 04/12/2022 10:55

toomuchlaundry · 04/12/2022 10:53

So will you not go on holiday anymore just in case they pick up an illness?

Ehm, no. I might keep her off for a few days before we go on holiday, but no, I would not avoid a holiday.

OP posts:
MarshaBradyo · 04/12/2022 10:55

Yes yabu but up to you

I agree with pp make yourself aware of symptoms and try not to overreact

Thepeopleversuswork · 04/12/2022 10:56

It is very OTT although I can understand it. Strep A complications are incredibly rare.

Fleabigg · 04/12/2022 10:56

Honestly, yes I think this is over the top. And why until Christmas? There are 2 months of winter left after Christmas, so why not until spring? And then you wouldn’t want to mess up any Easter holiday plans, so best not go back until after that. Same for the summer. And then it’s autumn again, all those back to school germs…

I have small DC too and yes, it’s concerning. But I never heard anything about the 4 children who died in 2017. Now I know the symptoms to watch out for we’re in a safer position than we were then, and I wouldn’t have dreamed of keeping them at home then.

toomuchlaundry · 04/12/2022 10:57

Scarlett fever/Strep A is mainly a winter/spring illness so didn’t know whether it would still be an issue when you go back to work

Original poster
glugluggg · 04/12/2022 10:58

ArcticSkewer · 04/12/2022 10:53

Is there anything exciting and Xmassy that your 3 year old would be sad to miss?.

I'd deal with your health anxiety if you think it's a bit out of control but if it's just a general 'can't be arsed dealing with sick kids over Xmas' thing, then sure, keep them at home and do nice stuff together. It's a really cute time of year to be at home, baking gingerbread, decorating the house, visiting grottos etc. I always enjoyed it. Why put them in nursery when you can be at home doing that kind of stuff together. Plus ... less bugs. It's the puking ones I hate.

I think it's a bit more that I don't want to deal with sick kids over Christmas, but also that I'm a bit worried.

A mix. I think though that everyone in my family thinks I should keep them both home before Christmas as well. It's not just me and it's not just because of strep. It's generally just avoiding them being sick over Christmas.

OP posts:
Bunnycat101 · 04/12/2022 11:01

I don’t buy the lack of mixing. My children were only not mixing during the March to June period of the first lockdown. I don’t believe 3 months was enough to cause all of this. Nurseries were back in summer 2020 and kept open. My eldest had a key worker place for the next lockdown and at least half the class were in. Children absolutely have been mixing for most of the pandemic period.

toomuchlaundry · 04/12/2022 11:01

Is your husband not going out of the house until Christmas either? I am the one who had brought in a bug to our house this week and very kindly shared it 😳

Original poster
glugluggg · 04/12/2022 11:03

toomuchlaundry · 04/12/2022 11:01

Is your husband not going out of the house until Christmas either? I am the one who had brought in a bug to our house this week and very kindly shared it 😳

Yeah there's obviously always that risk !

Last year DD got sick a few weeks before Christmas, so I kept her off. Then she got sick again a week or so after and she hadn't even gone to nursery ! That was annoying.

We were lucky, she was OK after that. And then constantly sick until summer !

OP posts:
ArcticSkewer · 04/12/2022 11:09

Do you think your health anxiety will be made better or worse if you keep your child at home due to your fears, then? That might be a better focus.
If it was me, and it wasn't because I was anxious about death, I'd keep them at home as I can't be bothered with sickness over Xmas and it's a nice time of year to do stuff with them.
But it may be better to play the long game. You don't want to end up like some of the other posters on mn with debilitating health anxiety centred around their kids.

Original poster
glugluggg · 04/12/2022 11:12

ArcticSkewer · 04/12/2022 11:09

Do you think your health anxiety will be made better or worse if you keep your child at home due to your fears, then? That might be a better focus.
If it was me, and it wasn't because I was anxious about death, I'd keep them at home as I can't be bothered with sickness over Xmas and it's a nice time of year to do stuff with them.
But it may be better to play the long game. You don't want to end up like some of the other posters on mn with debilitating health anxiety centred around their kids.

It's just that I've been home with two sick kids for almost three weeks. The baby was pretty bad, coughing so much and so congested and vomiting from being so blocked up,I had to keep a pretty much constant eye on him. He kept me awake so much, as he was so uncomfortable. I don't want to go through that again any time soon.

OP posts:
CanYouFeelMyHeart · 04/12/2022 11:13

Kids need to be exposed to various viruses though, otherwise you're just prolonging the whole thing.

Original poster
glugluggg · 04/12/2022 11:15

CanYouFeelMyHeart · 04/12/2022 11:13

Kids need to be exposed to various viruses though, otherwise you're just prolonging the whole thing.

Trust me, they have been exposed

OP posts:
CanYouFeelMyHeart · 04/12/2022 11:17

Right, by living their normal lives, so let them keep doing that.

aintnothinbutagstring · 04/12/2022 11:18

I think people are very vigilant of the strep A thing now though whereas before lots of parents (and GPs) would have dismissed a sore throat etc as viral and let nature take its course. So I'd be less concerned now than perhaps some weeks ago.
Your children are very young so unlikely to care too much about going to nursery and if you have big things planned for christmas, you'd not want them to be ill.

However you do sort of have to get used to always being worried about one illness or another when you have kids - when my eldest was a toddler, it was swine flu then we've had covid, no doubt there is more to come at one point or another! And children being exposed to all these childhood illnesses is quite normal - both of mine have had scarlet fever, it is not an unusual thing, just that most children will thankfully have only mild cases that can be treated with ABs. Many scientists have said that this invasive strep a is rare and we have seen more cases only because there has been a somewhat higher caseload of scarlet fever than usual.

ArcticSkewer · 04/12/2022 11:19

So if your worries are mainly practical (and needing more sleep definitely makes sense) then why not keep them at home and do cute Xmas stuff for a few weeks.

It's only nursery and you've got the time after Christmas to get back in a routine before you go back to work.

chelle0 · 04/12/2022 11:20

I'm with you OP, I'd keep them home. Last year we had one thing after another and norovirus over Christmas, it was fucking horrific. I'm not risking it this year. We aren't going to toddler groups now and luckily my daughter goes to my mum when we work. Lots of walks and indoor play. They'll be fine.

Sewwhatmrmagpie · 04/12/2022 11:20

Strep A is not a fatal disease. Like any virus/bacteria or can cause complications but if you're going to try and avoid that where do to stop? Flu kills plenty of people every year, a common cold even can lead to complications.

You can't live your life, and by proxy theirs, in fear of very small risks. The biggest impact of covid has been the isolation and lack of contact that small children had during the lockdown periods.

aintnothinbutagstring · 04/12/2022 11:23

So are you just not going to take your kids anywhere until christmas, a whole 3 weeks of staying in - no xmas shopping, no soft play, no groups, cafe trips, meeting up with friends and family?

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 04/12/2022 11:25

I think it’s less a case of having to isolate children (which is bad for them in so many other ways) than being alert to the symptom, and getting medical attention.

Drs will be really aware of it now, and test, give antibiotics etc. They won’t just assume tonsillitis. With treatment, children usually recover absolutely fine.

CanYouFeelMyHeart · 04/12/2022 11:36

Only nursery 🤨 For kids born during lockdown socialisation and general life experiences are really important.

It's so selfish to deny them that because of potential illnesses. Which are, for the vast majority, no big deal.

Original poster
glugluggg · 04/12/2022 11:40

CanYouFeelMyHeart · 04/12/2022 11:36

Only nursery 🤨 For kids born during lockdown socialisation and general life experiences are really important.

It's so selfish to deny them that because of potential illnesses. Which are, for the vast majority, no big deal.

Some kids never go to nursery. Mine has gone for over a year, I don't think a few weeks of not going makes me a selfish parent at all. What about spending quality time with mum, little brother and family, that's also important.

We can still do outdoor stuff, like animal parks, Christmas lights etc etc.

OP posts:
AutumnLeaves5 · 04/12/2022 11:40

Bunnycat101 · 04/12/2022 11:01

I don’t buy the lack of mixing. My children were only not mixing during the March to June period of the first lockdown. I don’t believe 3 months was enough to cause all of this. Nurseries were back in summer 2020 and kept open. My eldest had a key worker place for the next lockdown and at least half the class were in. Children absolutely have been mixing for most of the pandemic period.

But at that point we still had social distancing, majority of people wearing masks and hand sanitizing every 2 minutes.

This is the first winter/Christmas where mixing has been back to normal. People have been going abroad more, crowded Christmas markets/events, parties, no masks etc.

Clarabe1 · 04/12/2022 11:45

Op I had sepsis from strep A from a simple water infection. It’s one of those things that just happens. We all exposed to this bacteria unless we live in a bubble. Most of the time it’s harmless but sometimes it goes out of control. There is nothing you can do to prevent it other than that stop living. Saying you are not going to mix with people because of strep is the same as saying I am never getting in a car again because I could crash and die. It’s a risk we all have to take. Work on your anxiety because if you don’t this will get very out of control very fast.

CanYouFeelMyHeart · 04/12/2022 11:53

Right, well why are you even asking @glugluggg? You're so sure it's fine and right that you had to ask a bunch of strangers 🤷🏻‍♀️