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AIBU?

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Original poster

In think that most children don't stop believing in Father Christmas at 5 years old?

168 replies

Bbq1 · 03/12/2022 16:13

On Mumsnet, there seems to be a large contingent of posters who claim that children over the age of 5 don't believe in Santa and if they do believe then they shouldn't. I have never met a 5 year old who didn't wholeheartedly believe in Santa, elves, everything. I think peak believing years are actually age 4 to 8. It's actually sad because if a child doesn't believe in Santa at 5 then they never really have. I wasn't a particularly naive child but I was 10 when I worked it out. My ds was around 9 I think. To me believing up to age 10 or so is entirely the norm -vor am in the minority in thinking that ?

OP posts:
ILOVECHEESE79 · 03/12/2022 18:46

I didn't 'do' the Father Christmas tale before my DC started school but, having been in Reception for nigh on 2 terms, I'm having to play along, as they believe in all the magic.
Hopefully, it won't go on for too many years!

Candlesoftime · 03/12/2022 19:05

9 or 10 sounds a good age to me. 5 would be heartbreaking.

I remember the naughty boys at school telling everyone that Father Christmas isn't real and that their parents told them the presents were from them. I thought, well your parents probably have to buy you the presents instead of Father Christmas because you're so naughty all the time! 😂

Boooooot · 03/12/2022 19:07

My 8 year old still believes.

mamabear715 · 03/12/2022 19:08

He's not real? OMG... :-(

Suzi888 · 03/12/2022 19:11

St Nicholas was real so… 😉
I would say around 10 they may question, if they have siblings much younger.
I send money to Santa- so Santa gets what we’ve paid for, he’s basically fed ex, he just delivers.

Chickychoccyegg · 03/12/2022 19:13

If my dc hadn't believed at age 5 , I'd think I'd done a rubbish job of creating the whole Christmas magic thing.
My dd has just turned 10 and has been questioning a little, but has said she doesn't want me to tell her, she loves the whole santa/elves magic and doesn't want it to not be real, I think she'll tell me after Christmas that she knows.

Hellocatshome · 03/12/2022 19:21

My DS stopped believing at 5. He just announced that Santa, Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy were all made up and to stop lying to him, we told him it wasn't lying it was make believe like fairy tales. We had a chat about keeping the secret for the other boys and girls and his little brother then carried on as we had before. We still act like Santa is real now but no one in the house believes as they are 12 and 15.

I do think people who claim there 11 year olds at Secondary school still believe are a bit naive as I have never ever known this to be the case in NT children.

TribeD · 03/12/2022 20:27

DD is definitely in the "believe" stage. She'll be 7 early next year, and I know there aren't many magical years left, but while they last, we're making the most of them.

I'm almost 50, and I don't recall ever being told, and in fact my parents (mid 70's) have become more Christmas bonkers since their grandchildren were born, I'm fairly sure my DDad firmly believes 🎅

bevelino · 03/12/2022 20:31

My dds stopped believing at around 4-5. I don’t understand how children can seriously still believe at age10-11.

pointythings · 03/12/2022 20:35

Mine both worked it out at 7. DD1 was delighted to be sworn to secrecy and kept it from DD2 until she worked it out for herself. I don't think most of their classmates still believed after about 8.

110APiccadilly · 03/12/2022 20:36

I have a distinct memory of being aged about six and my slightly younger friend (he'd have been five, probably) announcing to a room that Santa wasn't real and being hurriedly shushed. What I remember thinking is, "Of course Santa's not real, everyone knows that, why do you think it's news?!" So I'd say plenty of children know by five! I'm amazed at the idea that a ten year old would still think Santa was real, though I believe the posters who say they did.

I don't ever remember really believing it, but I still enjoyed it immensely, loved putting a stocking up, writing letters to Santa, all of that. I find it baffling when people talk as if only children who fully believed in it enjoy it. Children pretend all the time and love it.

EconomyClassRockstar · 03/12/2022 20:41

Surely it also depends on where you live. We lived in an area with a high Jewish population when my kids were young so they definitely didn’t believe after about 5 as all their school friends had told them the truth already.

PomPomChatton · 03/12/2022 20:47

Last year my DD (then 5) no longer believed in Santa. This year (at 6) she has forgotten that she doesn't believe and seems to have gone back to believing. I can't keep up!

My DD8 has never thought Santa was real but tells me she still 'believes' because pretending is part of the magic.

33goingon64 · 03/12/2022 20:52

DS1 was 7 when he worked it out which I thought was quite young. DS2 is currently 7 but doesn't seem to have twigged yet. I think he'll cotton on next year if his brother doesn't do it for him.

Androideighteen · 03/12/2022 21:08

When I worked in schools and got asked whether Santa was real, usually because someone in the class had said he wasn't, I always told the askers that is what parents of children who are too naughty to get presents say to save their feelings. It satisfied the believers and shut up the rumour spreaders nicely!

twocatsandtwokids · 03/12/2022 21:35

My 6.5 year old fully believes. My 9.5 year old has just about worked it out but isn’t ready to totally give up the belief!

Beachhuts90 · 03/12/2022 23:03

I'm a primary teacher. When I worked in KS1 pretty much everyone in my classes believed. Now I teach LKS2 and it's about half and half in my class from what I've overheard.

WalkingOnTheCracks · 03/12/2022 23:08

Feef83 · 03/12/2022 16:28

Just read your history Op (quiet weekend with a cold!)

you have started threads ranging from thinking young children go to bed too early through to being baffled that parents don’t think cereal and toast is a good snack for a teen.

Why don’t you just focus on what you do?

….there’s just a teeny-weeny whiff of irony here.

Also, what are you trying to do? Shut down the entire internet?

Rollin · 03/12/2022 23:09

Both kids absolutely believed at age 10
then asked and were told before the next Xmas when they’d be 11.
most of DD’s 10 year friends genuinely believe.

Gintime74 · 03/12/2022 23:19

Mine have all been around 10 when they start questioning, laying little traps etc! So I think they probably have been unconvinced since age 8. The longer the magic is kept alive the better as far as I’m concerned.

LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet · 03/12/2022 23:22

I think 8/9 is probably a more accurate age. DD was 7

I never believed, ever. I was a very cynical child though 😂

Florenz · 03/12/2022 23:24

It's hard to keep kids believing when different families tell their kids different things, eg only the one "big" present is from Santa/all parentthey ss from mum and dad are "from Santa" and other presents are from the people who bought them for you so you have to thank them/ALL presents from Santa.

It's hard to make kids believe when they see the toys advertised on TV and in the shops and they're made of plastic and say "Made in China" on the box. The whole thing probably worked a lot better in Victorian times when kids might get toys made of wood and it was easier to imagine them being made by Santa and his elves.

1982mommaof4 · 03/12/2022 23:28

My DD is 9 and absolutely still believes

Hellocatshome · 03/12/2022 23:29

Florenz · 03/12/2022 23:24

It's hard to keep kids believing when different families tell their kids different things, eg only the one "big" present is from Santa/all parentthey ss from mum and dad are "from Santa" and other presents are from the people who bought them for you so you have to thank them/ALL presents from Santa.

It's hard to make kids believe when they see the toys advertised on TV and in the shops and they're made of plastic and say "Made in China" on the box. The whole thing probably worked a lot better in Victorian times when kids might get toys made of wood and it was easier to imagine them being made by Santa and his elves.

I agree, I think its all got too complicated now as well with the Elf on the Shelf and Christmas Eve boxes and a Santa's Grotto at every turn. It was a lot easier when it was mostly all down to your imagination.

1982mommaof4 · 03/12/2022 23:32

Also I never had the chat with my eldest now 15.. he just eye rolls at me when I talk about Santa 😂