Light hearted - who would you like a special place in hell reserved for?

[KimberleyClark]

For me it’s people who drape their hair over the back of their plane seat. Takes obliviousness to other people to a whole new level.

People who are already late meeting you and turn up with a takeaway coffee in their hand.

People who post on social media but are really obtuse I.e “that’s the last time i ever trust anyone! You’re all snakes!” So the PM hun brigade come rampaging in.

social media again - people who post 600 holiday pictures. No one cares.

people in work who act like the company will collapse if you don’t do something then and there. My work is like this ie everything is urgent ergo nothing is urgent.

Hairspreaders. It's like the hair version of manspreading. They are long-haired people who do not tie their hair back when swimming. Or who flip their hair around in crowded places, like on a busy train. Urgh. Keep your own hair in your own personal space - I do not want it in mine.

@Dilbertian i have family in France and you can’t go swimming anywhere where they live without a swim cap, and I blame the hairspreaders for ruining it for the rest of us!

People who go into a cafe/restaurant just before closing time 😡😡

GTFO no one wants you there at that time we have a lot to do after closing and we want to go home at a reasonable hour!

@squashedalmondcroissant ive done this, but in my defence I went in at 8.30pm and didn’t realise they closed at 9 until they were stacking chairs half way through main course! A ridiculously early time to close IMO

Micro managing bosses.
Social media influencers- does my head in!
People who don't think before they speak.

The people who ONLY go to the pub on Christmas eve and expect to be served before all the locals who drink there every week.

People who decide it's totally fine to paint their nails on public transport. Closely followed their their pals who eat smelly food, or who are strangers to the concept of headphones on public transport. 😡

This was the case when I was a child. You weren't allowed in the baths without a cap on. I had a lovely one with flowers all over it - looked like one of Elizabeth Taylors hats (or the Queens). I can't go in baths or pools now because of hair getting wrapped round my fingers. Ugh. 🤮

Double-parkers.

Those who just park wherever the hell they like, usually outside takeaways, put on their hazard lights, and cause utter fucking chaos for miles.

When I win the lottery, I'm getting a tank and I'm gonna roll it over every double-parker I encounter during rush hour.

Folks who insist on having loud phone conversations on their phones on public transport where I can't escape.

People who are already late meeting you and turn up with a takeaway coffee in their hand.

That’s really unfair in this day and age. Most people order from transport via Apps so the cup is literally waiting their to grab as you walk past on direct route from transport to office door. If someone called me out on this it wouldn’t be pretty as getting that cup would not have delayed me past the 1sec (literally) it takes to check name in cup/lid is mine before grabbing it on my way.

People who don't put their dogs on leads and then go "he won't harm you" when the dog is jumping and barking and growling at me

Sovereign citizens

Slow walkers, but particular he meandering ones who weave so you can’t overtake them.

People who wait till their sale is rung up before fishing through their bag for their wallet.

People who screech about climate change, but wouldn’t be seen dead at the local tree-planting day, run their air conditioning all year (in the tropics) and use their dryers on sunny days.

Those utter arses who eat loudly/ talk/ check phones in the cinema/theatre....why??? Sends me skywards!

Work colleagues who book a super early meeting in your diary so you have to wake up earlier than usual for it - then arrive late

Rank amateurs who think it's a good idea to suggest things to me (30 years in the field) with a disingenuous "couldn't you just...". If it was that bloody easy, I'd have thought of it.

I'm a Londoner by upbringing so also anyone who stands in doorways, at the top of stairs, in the flow of people, stops dead anywhere or doesn't get the fuck out of the way. Meanderers if you will.

People who stop in the middle of the supermarket aisle to have a chat, blocking the way with their trolleys.

British people who say “ass” instead of “arse”. You’re not bloody American and you sound like a dick!
Also my husband’s brother’s wife. Horrible bastard

People who park in disabled spaces without a blue badge.

Smokers.

Teachers who spread girls out in class to improve the boy's behaviour. This might just be the reason girls are not choosing computer science for GCSE or A Level. A girl might spend all of her classes siting between two boys, is it any wonder she picks childcare, or health and social care when she knows she will not be next to or between two boys.

Academics who leave really unhelpful and unkind comments all over a (draft) piece of work. Your job is to guide and encourage and - overall - EXPLAIN, not absolutely obliterate people’s confidence and make them feel horrendous. Special mention to just “???” In the margin. Twats.

Oh, and if a majority of students have ‘failed to meet the brief,’ that’s probably a you issue. A majority wouldn’t ‘fail,’ if you’d done your job properly…

Once had a woman attempt to paint her nails beside us on the plane. The stewardess went ballistic!

Slow walkers.

painfully slow drivers.

tailgators.

people who stand half a millimetre behind you in the shop queue, breathing down your neck.

anyone who asks me where I’m from then proceeds to do a “och aye the noo” impression when I tell them.

anyone who wears those ridiculously massive spider like fake eyelashes

the man who sat next to me on a plane flight recently who ate a prawn sandwich followed by a boiled egg. Then sat sucking his teeth.