Mum shoplifting in Tesco

[1000yellowdaisies]

Not so much an Aibu but its bothering me.
I was in tesco before, just arrived and was faffing about near the entrance getting a scan as you shop scanner thing.
A lady was leaving the shop and the alarms went off. Security took her to one side and found she was leaving with stuff she hadn't paid for. The security guard and 3 staff from the customer service kiosk went through her push chair and when they found more unpaid for stuff they took her through to the back.
Her child was roughly same age as my youngest.

I feel sorry for her. Yes I know she could be a thieving chancer with enough money but she wasn't nicking luxuries like bottles of booze, it was nappies and calpol from what i saw. What will likely happen to her? She looked so embarrassed.

It does tend to make a difference as to what the shop managers will do with you.

£1.50 bottle of cider - you'll likely get a ban and nothing else.

£30 bottle of spirit - they're probably going to call the police (who may not turn up, still)

If gour stealing it it doesn't matter how expensive it is though does it?! Might as well steal the good stuff.

Oh, yes, I agree (with that being the 'hanged for a sheep as a lamb' mindset, not with the actual stealing, of course). I'm just thinking that, if you were really poor that you normally bought cheap stuff, but this time you couldn't even afford to pay for that - it does look suspicious that the expensive item would even be on your radar, and maybe a giveaway that you are indeed a pro stealing to sell on.

Those thieves increase prices for everybody.

So sad, times are bloody hard for so many. I'm sure she doesn't want to have to steal nappies and calpol.

😪

Bless your younger self.

I remember doing the same.

I feel grateful times have changed for me, but feel great empathy for others struggling, it's not bloody easy.

I worked on the customer service desk in a supermarket beginning with S. the security more than likely won't do anything. They will probably ban her. Security guards are human and will probably understand tbh. It's more the folk stealing tvs etc they would tend to detain. X

Admittedly I used to love it when shoplifters came in I worked back shift on the desk and had a front row seat. The security knew who to watch and always approached just as they walked out the beeping doors and it would all go down hill from there. A few times we had to get the police there ASAP due to fights and stuff but most of the time we're people out of it and not even remembering what was going on. I'd be front row with the popcorn xx

When I worked in retail a few years ago, we couldn't even get the police out when an apprehended thief pulled a knife on the manager in the car park. It's sadly open season now in retail as the police don't have the resources to attend.

No wonder professional shoplifters use buggies. I once accidentally nicked a pack of cat food - the expensive stuff that’s the only thing dd’s cat will eat.

I had baby Gdd in her buggy, got to the checkout, could have sworn I’d picked up two packs, but there was only one.

It wasn’t until I was nearly back at dd’s and it started raining - so I pulled the hood over Gdd - that I realised I must have put one pack of fussy cat food on the folded hood, and it had slipped between the folds, right out of sight.

I went cold, to think how easily I could have been done for shoplifting. I still feel bad about not going back and paying for it, but it was raining harder and getting late, and I had a 60 mile drive home.

My sympathy is with those who are scraping along in life. No one is moaning about the rich fat cats who are shafting us all with their tax avoiding scams. They are far worse.

Nappies and calpol. That's so sad

So sad 😢

I think there are some rather naive posts on this thread! I've seen threads on MN where people have bragged about shoplifting because they simply don't want to pay. I'd imagine most shoplifters are acting out of entitlement, not desperation.

A significant amount of them will be drug addicts who are either stealing food because they've spent all their money on feeding their habit, or stealing goods to sell for money in order to buy their next fix.

I have no sympathy for them whatsoever. Lock them up and throw away the key as far as I am concerned.

I donate nappies and baby wipes to my local food bank when I do a supermarket shop, however, given that I am going to really struggle to pay my heating bills this year I am not going to be able to do this for much longer. This is another consequence of the never-ending price rises everywhere, more people needing help and less help being out there.

It is. Some shops phone for any & every theft regardless of the value

Alternatively she could be a professional or just stealing for the sake of it. Don't assume what you think you see is what's happening

I’m so sorry you had to do that. In my book what you did wasn’t wrong your baby needed clean nappies. I’m so sorry and I hope things are better

I'm pretty certain if a person with a baby went into a food bank and told staff they had no nappies for their baby they would be given some. Stealing is not the answer.

Could be desperation could be a professional lifter. So little is done these days its open season. An acquaintance of my mum has a drug-addicted son. He has been banned from most supermarkets in his area. His face is well known. Doesn't stop him though, he knows he will get a slap on the wrist, not bothered about a caution as he doesn't work anyway so it's not affecting his job prospects, the worse he ever got was a tag or a bit of community service. There is so little punishment it doesn't deter him.

You say that but I once read of someone being prosecuted for the theft of a toothbrush and toothpaste. It happens.

You could've paid next time you were in the area to be fair

I've no idea how to name change, so I'm just going to go ahead and post this under my usual name.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed about this, massively, but I thought I'd share my lived experience.

I'm 49, and now live a very respectable and honest life. Absolutely no-one in my circle would know this about me.

When I was in my late 20s, I escaped from my violent ex-h with just a carrier bag of stuff, and my 2yo DS in a buggy.
We were lucky to get a place in emergency accommodation, before getting moved into a council flat on the 13th floor of a Glasgow tower block.

I loved it. It felt like a safe haven, after everything we'd been through.

Except, I had nothing. No income until my benefits claim was processed, and I was so scared about how I could feed my toddler.

One afternoon, I went across to Safeway. I had about £2.50 to spend, IIRC, so I bought some bread, a tin of beans, a bag of porridge oats, some milk, and two toilet rolls.

I'm going to be honest, I had a block of cheddar cheese which I "accidentally" forgot to put through the checkout. It was tucked under my shopping bag, and I managed to leave the store with it.

It was a horrible feeling, to the point I can't explain it. I was brought up to know that stealing is wrong, and I can't justify it.
I felt fucking awful, like I'd let everyone down.

I know you're all going to jump on me now, but I'm going to complete this story to its natural end...

Two weeks later, I went back to the same store, and I bought some dried pasta, a loaf of bread, and a jug of milk.
Again, I "accidentally" hid a block of cheese under my shopping bag.

On my way out the store, I was stopped by a security guard, and taken back in. The Police were called. I desperately offered to hand back the cheese but (understandably) the Police took the stance that a theft had been committed, and I was put into the back of a Police vehicle and taken to the Station.

It was a horrific experience. I'd never been in trouble before, and I was scared and vulnerable.

To cut a very long story short, I was given a talking to at the Police Station - so, given a chance.
The Manager at Safeway was also willing to give me a chance - as long as I promised to try and turn my life around.

I did exactly that.

I enrolled myself into college, then on to a degree course.
So, I've been lucky. I've managed to turn my life around, and I'm now a very law abiding person. I wouldn't dream of stealing cheese these days - but, then, I'm in a fortunate position of being able to afford cheese.

Let's not cast judgement on those whose lives don't follow our paths.

I remember years ago, I think it was the late 80’s, where a young mum was prosecuted after stealing a pint of milk off a doorstep and in the same week, in a different case, a man was prosecuted for stealing thousands from his company.

There was (rightly) outrage because the young mum got a 12 month sentence (maximum that a magistrate could impose) and the other git got 8 months because he gave the money back.

IIRC a pint of milk was only about 50p or something ridiculous back then.

If she was a prolific shoplifter just looking to make a few extra quid for beer money on the side then shame on her, I hate thieves. On the other hand if she was a struggling young mother having to do it as a last resort then I feel incredibly sorry for her and hope she gets the help she needs and that her circumstances change for the better soon. No one should be that hard up that they can’t afford these essentials. Of course there are people that just don’t feel like they should have to pay for anything and refuse to do so.
I’ve seen quite a few people shoplifting in a small supermarket near me. They’re pretty brazen as I’ve easily seen them and I’m not even looking. It’s always been smaller items, packs of cheese, bacon, large chocolate bars etc. I’ve also been offered stuff in the pub on two occasions. The first time it was two surprisingly old men carrying bags full of meat, joints of beef/pork, whole hams etc. I didn’t buy anything but plenty did and the old fellas left with empty bags. The second time it was a real assortment, blocks of cheese, jars of coffee, razors and so on. I don’t think they managed to sell as much. The men selling the meat were there on a Sunday not long after it opened and the people buying didn’t bat an eyelid, almost looked like it was a regular occurrence. Maybe they’re in there every Sunday with joints for that days Sunday Roast. I’ve only been in there a handful of times and never at that time of day so who knows. The staff were all turning a blind eye which makes them part of the problem I suppose.
Another example. I used to work at a clinic and I was on my feet a lot, as were the other nurses. Any nurse will tell you that you have to wear half decent comfy shoes and we favoured a well established British footwear brand that is known for measuring kids feet 🤣. One of my colleagues knew some shoplifters from the pub who would get them to order. She’d tell them what sizes all the girls were and which style they preferred and by the next week she’d turn up at work with pairs of new shoes that would probably cost around £50 for £15. Out of about ten of us there was only myself and one other nurse that declined their offer of stolen shoes. I wouldn’t have taken them if they were free to be honest and neither would my colleague. That’s how rife it is. I don’t mix in those circles but even I’ve been aware of 3 groups of thieves. Depressing. I think a PP described it as a sign of the times, ain’t that the truth!