To feel really irritated by my friend asking me to review her book…

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So a friend of mine has self-published a book for kids. It seems nicely written with cute illustrations. But I don’t think it’s exceptional. She’s asked me to help her by reviewing it on Amazon.
Of course I’ve said I will… once I’ve purchased it of course, otherwise it won’t be a ‘verified purchase’.
I looked on Amazon and she already has multiple 5-star reviews (nothing less) … they must all be from friends as it’s only just come out and how would anyone know about it otherwise? Now it’s really bugging me as I often rely on reviews when I buy books and other stuff, and the thought of being hoodwinked by reviews like that enrages me.
On the other hand, fair play to her, she’s gone for it, she needs the support and encouragement, and it would be really mean not to help, right?
I can’t decide what to think, please help!!

You sound a bit jealous. It's really hard to create something and actually follow through to the end, get it published and expose yourself to potential public criticism (or comments like, 'it's not exceptional'. So what if it's simply 'good', that's still an amazing achievement). It takes a lot of courage. Getting any genuine sales at all is really hard, particularly if it's your first attempt. This applies to not just books, but artwork, music, a new business venture, etc....

You are her friend, so give her a nice review and help her along FFS.

Oh and now you are talking about her in a post, and although confidentially, trying to get others to agree with the fact that she is irritating in some way for asking for your support. Nice.

As for reviews on a kids book... Unless it's destined to be the next Harry Potter it's just a book. Just say it's nice

I'm guessing that, 5-stars or not, the friend is looking for something significantly more effusive than "this is a nice book". It could be taken as quite passive-aggressive when coming from a friend, even if that's really not the intention.

That reminds me a bit of the reviews of the musical in The IT Crowd that said very non-committal things like "not as long as some musicals" and "everybody clapped at the end"

I'm really not getting the jealousy that people are imputing to OP, mind.

In my experience little kids like the books that are total rubbish ! Not literary masterpieces!

Like when you spend thousands taking them on an amazing holiday to Disneyworld and ask them what their absolute favourite bit was, and without skipping a beat, they say "When Daddy farted on the plane!"

Just support your friend!

Thank you @WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll
I'm glad that you get what I'm trying to say.
I've noticed a few people on here saying stuff like it's 'ONLY' a book, and 'don't even read it, just give it 5 stars and get over your jealousy!'

Or just write 'Cute illustrations.'
I think she, as the writer, might hate me forever if I put that.

Also, if I wrote a book and my friend couldn't even be bothered to look at a few pages, that would probably piss me off more than an honest review!

Anyway, obviously I'm never going to give the book three stars or share my real thoughts with her. (That's what anonymous forums or for, right? I was just interested in what others thought.) In real life, I've been nothing but supportive actually - though I've found the thought of a fake 5-star review very uncomfortable and wondered how to approach it. I mean, the book has good points but also grammatical errors and inconsistencies.

(Yup, get over yourself and your pathetic 'save the world from fake reviews' mission, OP).

@Angelofthenortheast that's so interesting! can you do an AMA sometime?

OP if she's a great friend give her a five star review to help, as @Angelofthenortheast says the odds seem against people like your friend so isn't it good to help her if you can?

Look at the number of 5* reviews the fifty shades series had....

Probably the worst written book (erotica or otherwise) I've ever read!

I would be more annoyed that the friend is asking me to buy their book. If you can't review it without buying, then she needs to give you a free copy - because she is the one who wants your review.
Not the same situation, but I had a friend advertising their book, I made the right noises (sounds interesting etc) but did not purchase as it wasn't my cup of tea. Had another friend advertise book on a WhatsApp chat, cue everyone falling over immediately wanting (paid) copies. I just kept quiet as again, didn't really care for it.