To feel really irritated by my friend asking me to review her book…

[RunicWords]

So a friend of mine has self-published a book for kids. It seems nicely written with cute illustrations. But I don’t think it’s exceptional. She’s asked me to help her by reviewing it on Amazon.
Of course I’ve said I will… once I’ve purchased it of course, otherwise it won’t be a ‘verified purchase’.
I looked on Amazon and she already has multiple 5-star reviews (nothing less) … they must all be from friends as it’s only just come out and how would anyone know about it otherwise? Now it’s really bugging me as I often rely on reviews when I buy books and other stuff, and the thought of being hoodwinked by reviews like that enrages me.
On the other hand, fair play to her, she’s gone for it, she needs the support and encouragement, and it would be really mean not to help, right?
I can’t decide what to think, please help!!

Wow, I wasn't aware you knew what I did for a living...
But I don't think you need to be part of the publishing world to understand the integrity that was mentioned... do you think book publishers have a monopoly on that?
I'm really passionate about books and reading and I love kids' books. I expect the books I buy for my kids (or for anyone) to be beautifully written, beautifully illustrated, well edited and well produced. Otherwise I'd rather not spend money on them.
Sorry but there it is.
So yup, being taken in by a fake review would really piss me off.

Agree. There is no way I would leave a fake review just to pander to a friend. Integrity is important.

God how jealous are you; and what silly excuses for your own behaviour. How many mates does dhe have v the size of rhe intended audience,

Christ I did this for my daughters friends mum. I bought the book and yes gave a 5 star review. I didn’t even read it. Why, Becsyde I like the friend, they asked me to and I’m happy to support anyone getting a food hold.

get over yourself going on about the ethics of Amazon reviews. Seriously

It’s fair to think that you would have said at the outset if you were in that area of work as that would have probably influenced your reaction.

Put things in the scales - your overwhelming desire to protect the buying public (from what, I’m not sure since everyone knows that book preferences are subjective) and saying something honest and nice about the book even if it’s not 5 star, probably 4 star since you’re so very conflicted? At least it drives traffic.

What’s the worst that can happen? she’s mad at you and you’re no longer friends? Might be best for both of you.

And do you spend this much time agonising over yourAmazon purchase reviews generally, weighing the potential harm that a 1 star difference might make?

Is the book defective? Can it cause an injury? No.

That's quite a low bar, though! "5 stars - it didn't give me a paper cut"

That's hilarious. Best comment I've read on here so far!

overwhelming desire to protect the buying public

Careful we don't know what abject terrors this book is about to unleash upon the world
🤣🤣🤣👀

**

@Maggiethecat forgot to quote you in above.

Yes @Maggiethecat seems to have decided my desire to protect the buying public from dodgy purchases is simply too blooming overwhelming to be ignored. It's true people... I simply cannot fight the feeling anymore. And yes, underneath it all I'm just ragin' with green-eyed jealousy.

But anyway ... no... just a simple query about 5star Amazon reviews and friends who ask for them that seems to have taken on a weird life of its own. 

I think, to say how many parents there are on MN, there's quite a surprisingly dismissive attitude here of 'whatever - that'll do' when it comes to books for children. Just because their appropriate level of content and vocabulary will be basic, that's no reason not to seek to select quality for them.

We all know very well that children frequently get fixated on their favourite books and want the same one again and again and again. They absorb them until they learn them by heart. Why would you not want to actively choose titles that will help them learn and develop in the best way possible - as well as grabbing their interest and attention?

I'll bet nobody on here would say "oh whatever - it's only a children's book" if they accidentally bought a book that promoted a sexist attitude or even one with questionable language in it, of any kind.

I'm not saying that OP's friend has used any inappropriate content or language - I'm sure she hasn't; but why would you not want to give your children the very best books that you can for them, rather than just 'that'll do' fillers - and, by extension, help other parents to make a similarly informed decision?

That's why it's a hero's journey. Obvs. Wouldn't be much point if the polar bears were just irritably having a lie in & a takeaway next door.

I'm not saying I'd write it, btw. It's a terrible premise & I was taking the piss. But it's got legs (tiny flippy penguin legs).

Jealous much

I don't understand reviewing books and only buying on the thoughts of others. What one person would think is brilliant, others find awful. Read the blurb and if it interests you read the book.

As for reviews on a kids book... Unless it's destined to be the next Harry Potter it's just a book. Just say it's nice l, support your friend on her adventure and stop getting jealous of what she has achieved and you haven't.

In my experience little kids like the books that are total rubbish ! Not literary masterpieces!

a five star review on amazon would put me off as it’s clearly all adults doing the reviewing.

children are more likely to enjoy a book where the adults say it’s irritatingly repetitive with a limited story line! 😂

unless I knew of the book/author (Road Dahl/Shirley Hughes/Allan ahlberg etc) I’d not buy off Amazon anyway. I’d take children to a shop/library & let them choose.

How would you feel if you asked a friend for a personal reference & they told the absolute truth, warts & all? As someone whose work relies on good reviews, I am enormously grateful to my friends for supporting me through leaving positive remarks. There have been the odd few who have taken your approach, though (despite being happy enough to take freebies from me in most cases, though, or receive massive discounts), & it has been deeply hurtful. It opened my eyes as to who my friends were.
Support your friend & give the 5 stars.

I have an acquaintance who self published and promoted with a book launch, publicity, social media campaign etc. I read a lot and willingly parted with the £2.99 for the kindle version.

My goodness it was challenging to read. I gave up on the third chapter. it reminded me of my 10 year old’s prose. All of the reviews were 5* but I could work out who some of them are by their nicknames on Amazon.

when I asked I said it wasn’t my genre and changed the subject…

@RunicWords My OH is an author. He is signed up with one of the largest publishing houses in the world. It is incredibly difficult to achieve that. At no point when starting out, had he asked for 5 star reviews, and he has never asked anyone to buy his books. Many people we know haven't bought them, or left reviews, and that's fine, it's not their genre or taste and he's successful through sheer hard work without them. Its deeply presumptuous to expect people to buy XYZ from you.

While it's lovely that your friend has fulfilled her desire to write a book, absolutely anyone, regardless of their grasp of writing, can be self published on Amazon. Consequently there is a lot of complete rubbish out there. The book buying public know that, and a solid wave of 5 stars on a self published book, tells you they are all fake. It's difficult as your friend would like you to support her, but you're lying to the public, which I don't condone. It p1sses me off when ive bought stuff and wasted money due to fake reviews. I've been in exactly this situation OP, and I successfully avoided the topic, and didn't review. No falling out, no lying.

I never trust amazon reviews anymore. There's been quite a few times I've ordered something and been promised a £5 amazon voucher for a 5 star review. If. I've done an honest review and then mentioned the offer of a voucher in my review, amazon have declined my review saying it breaches community standards. The also never seem to want to publish my negative reviews for things either

Good reply @SilentHedges .

Your DH is a professional author, and as such he's not reliant on his friends and family to subsidise him, as he has a contract through an actual publisher.

My friend is an author and the only time she asked me to leave a review she actually gave me the book - not self published- to allow me to do that. She does quite a lot of self promotion through her FB feed, but as that's free to read, I'm fine with that.

@rookiemere Thank you, likewise your author friend has integrity, which comes from belief and confidence in their work.

But reviews and references should be honest? I'd not do a reference for anyone unless they had a worked for me (unless it's a personal one where it's being done more on basis of confirming work gaps)
So I also won't review a service I hadn't used.
The ones who used your service and gave you bad reviews are rude. Better to leave no review if you didn't think it any good.

Just a thought, OP - why not just leave the review WITHOUT buying it from Amazon? If you have a verified purchase review, people put my weight behind them when deciding whether or not to buy it.

If you don't buy it, people will be able to tell you're a friend/family member reviewing, and decide accordingly. Another thing to fluff it out, you could say "I received an advance copy of this book". That also tells people you're a friend!

If it is rubbish I’d probably leave a fairly anodyne review. She’s your friend and these reviews are important (even though I take them with a large pinch of salt). A friend of my brother’s wrote a political memoir a couple of years ago. I really enjoyed it and messaged him saying so. He asked if I’d review it on Amazon as it makes a difference. I was delighted to do so.

Seriously?!! Does it really matter if you big up your mate’s book? Will anyone die if you say you loved it but you didn’t?? Everyone knows Amazon book reviews are mostly fake anyway so stop stressing and just give her 5 stars. She’s going to be pretty upset if you don’t.