What's a lesson you learn the hard way in regards to money and finances

[Cupcakeicecream]

What's a lesson you learn the hard way in regards to money and finances.

Never get married if you are the main earner and if you do never pool all your money in a joint bank account.

Not sure you’ll get an answer 🤣

@Ralphswife
Interesting about the highest pay in early 40s. Do you mind sharing the recommendation for after early 40 career development tips? Thank you very much.

@Thinkingswillbebetter - no recommendations I'm afraid. I was sceptical at the time (and in a high paying job), but it turned out to be very true in my case. A combination of having kids late and then trying to find work in my 50s when most organisations consider you to be too old to be any use.

Employer contributions have to continue in full during the period of SMP.

They do not have to continue beyond this.
Employee contributions will drop during this time if based on SMP.

Unless your employer offers better than standard maternity provision, your pension contributions will drop substantially while you are on maternity leave.

I didn't think about that until years later and I can never get back the years of missed compound interest.

Never take finance out form someone else. I was lucky and by bf continued to pay after we split. It could have been very costly

Divorces are expensive and impact your finances for years. I've been divorced twice and have almost had to reset my financial life twice. I've had a mortgage for 32 years and I still have 16 years to pay

A poor credit score impacts more than you think, mobile phone contracts, loans, mortgages and mean you end up paying more, it also takes 6 years before it improves if you default on something

Very true. A family friend lived in a house with an old kitchen and bathroom and no central heating, When she died she left around £100K. Sadly to their generation having money in the bank was the most important thing.
I've decided that my retirement money is for spending. I'll make sure I've got enough for emergencies and the kids will get the house.

*Don't be too frugal in your later years if you have the money. The number of people I see who could massively improve their quality of life if they spent even a tiny fraction of their 'savings' , but refuse to because of some ingrained principle.
You enter this world with nowt and you leave it with nowt !

Very true. A family friend lived in a house with an old kitchen and bathroom and no central heating, When she died she left around £100K. Sadly to their generation having money in the bank was the most important thing.
I've decided that my retirement money is for spending. I'll make sure I've got enough for emergencies and the kids will get the house*

This was my grandparents, hokes in their towels, never went anywhere it did anything, House always freezing. Turned out they had 100s of 1000s of £ in the bank. They both ended up in a care home and ended up with next to nothing left.

Yes, add to this that everyone else has their own financial thresholds.

My friend spend spend spends. She eats at fancy restaurants, buys expensive (but quality) clothes, etc. But she never uses credit, she isn't in debt.

Recently, I discovered that her "big promotion" salary was £30k. Yet her spending habits are wildly more lavish than mine. I've was earning almost double that last year. Now I'm earning £30k, and feel a creeping anxiety that I'm not saving half my salary.

We earn about the same now, and I was the one itching with anxiety about the bills at the meet up.

I make no apology for being a saver - last year I was in a horrible place, and I could leave without money being a worry. But I always know that if my friends knew that I meant "I can't afford it because I put money in savings first" I'd get a lot of side eye.

go for a walk, sit in a cafe with a good book
But don’t be a twat and sit there for hours with one coffee like my aunty does. Especially if it’s a small independent place.

One year at uni I became very depressed and started spending all my money on crap to fill the void. It didn't work and I was completely utterly broke for the rest of my studies and too embarrassed to tell my parents. I was so ashamed. Taught me how important it is to budget my monthly outgoings but still allow myself a little bit.

Unfortunately, it's the way people were back then. Not just money, but possessions, too, such as the "best" china tea set, the "best" tablecloth, etc - most people had a cupboard full of "best" stuff that they never used, except for "important" things like when the vicar came for afternoon tea! Such a travesty really. Same with wedding presents, lots of people had loads of wedding presents they never used.

It was summed up in the novel "Mill on the Floss" where there was a woman who had lots of "best" things in the cupboard that literally never saw the light of day, but she had a warm glow inside knowing that once she'd died, people would find out all the "best" things she'd possessed.

What a waste and what an awful way to live your life. But I think it came from the war years when people had nothing, so when they got "treasures", they wanted to keep them nice, even if that meant never using them.

Keep tax credit peeps up to date- am currently paying back 3k as they overpaid when I couldn’t estimate how much I would earn.

I’d gone from employed to freelance, and really had no idea what it would work out at after tax- should have given some kind of estimate as they paid out for half a year as if I was earning nothing

You only get to spend your cash once; if you waste it you’ve only got your frivolous self to blame!!

Totally this!

Never pay a builder in advance.

As a journo (for 25 years) never write anything for free.

The same for me ^

That just because buying x on a catalogue will "only cost a tenner a month" and buying y on credit "is only 25 a month", that all adds up to a LOT if you're not careful.

Similarly, just because you "can afford" all those £10s and £25s, if you're not able to put any money aside for essentials like clothes, car repairs, savings etc after you've made those payments, you actually can't afford them.

I also didn't get a credit card til I was in my 30s cos I thought I'd get myself into loads of debt. I was right. I wish I knew why I'd bothered, 5k later.

I'm still learning though. I have zero financial sense, partly because I grew up without being taught any and have had to learn myself. I'm obviously a slow learner

Next time, cancel the direct debit and direct the bailiffs to collect the car at his address.

Very good advice for lots of things actually.

similarly, remember the time value of money: £100 in your hand now is worth more than £100 promised in a month’s time - because anything can happen in a month!

I’m a freelancer. I have a one strike rule: if anyone pisses me about re paying me, I never work for them again.

Don't lend money to people you know, unless they are family and you absolutely know that you can trust them. I never lend money to my oldest DD (in her 40's) because I know I'll never see it again and can't believe her when she says what it is for.

I agrée with lots of these:
Start a pension early
Don't lend money you can't afford to lose
Don't put stuff on the credit card that you can't afford to pay off in full each month

Never buy on credit. Like, ever. If you cannot afford it upfront you can’t afford it. Absolutely live within your means & learn to keep a tight spreadsheet of income & ALL expenditure. Know exactly what’s coming in & what’s going out. All the time.

Terrible advice, always buy everything over £100 on a credit card, even if you instantly pay it off. Free insurance