DH santa visit

[Oceanmoonandstars]

My almost 3 Yr old and almost 1 yr old have been booked to see santa today. Oldest boy is so excited and been talking about it all weekend

Baby is a bad sleeper I was up from 12-2 then dh 3-5. He went bk to bed til 10am.

Have the boys dressed in Xmas jumpers etc and dh says he's not going as he's tired. It's been booked since september. I'm tired too but wouldn't dream of not going or taking them.

It's the first time we've done santa as they were both lockdown babies so feels like a special milestone. The venue is a 10 min walk so could be home and back in hour.

Just feel really disappointed. There's a Xmas Market etc and thought I could look at stalls have a festive hot drink etc. Will be harder on my own with 2. Was really looking forward to a family day out as on my own a lot with the dc.

I understand people not feeling great and usually it wouldn't be a problem id let him rest. But just feel really let down for the dc and this (in my eyes) big milestone occasion.

AIBU?

I'd say go but then say to him to have a nap after.

I would do this. I agree that it’s a special thing for your oldest but your youngest might be too young to really like it this year.
If DH isn’t coming, youngest stays with him.

@Ohwowsers i was giving birth last Xmas time and there was the unknown of omicron so we didn't make it to santa last year

@Oceanmoonandstars OK but it's not a lockdown baby. Lockdown babies were actually born in the nationwide lockdown between March 2020 and March 2021.

And OP? When does she get to nap?

Bloody men - absolutely flipping useless.

Leave the baby at home with your husband. The baby will not have the faintest idea what is going on and will not enjoy queuing and will probably be freaked out by santa.

Take your 2 year old with you

Why does he need to nap?!

Excellent solution!

As your baby won’t know any different, this year take your older child and enjoy it with him and leave the baby with your “poor, tired chap”. Alternatively, take them both, then bring them home to him and go back to enjoy a mooch with a hot drink.

Yeah. What a couple of others said - leave baby with old Mr tired, and take your 3 year old - much easier for you

I agree with some of the others, leave the 1 year old at home as they won't know any different and just take the older one.

I think it is ridiculous. You do not opt out of parenting because you are tired. It would really damage my respect level if my partner did not put family first in this circumstance.

We have late teens now and my DH is sometimes not the easiest person, but he would never have flaked out at such a milestone.

Having said that, I don't think your DH in his mind is being deliberately unreasonable because he's tired. Men IMO don't are just not sentimental about this type of thing and he just probably doesn't get the significance.

I think if you gently implore him to come rather than berating him, you'll have more luck.

@Ohwowsers legal restrictions were lifted March 2022. This could be what she means, but that's besides the point of her post.

Because he's tired?

I didn't go on DCs first or second visit to Santa. Important milestone my arse.
The issue is you need help and he can't be arsed when he knows you're exhausted and struggle on your own with 2 of them.
Make sure he looks after them all afternoon and evening when you get back. He should be fresh as a daisy after all.

Oh, boo hoo

He's a grown up. He can have a coffee and get on with it like everyone else!

It’s a little strange going to see Santa when it’s not Xmas though.

Leave the 1yo with him. They won't really get what's happening or remember it.

Go and have a nice day with the 3yo.

@Shade17 my dh does shift work so one of the only wkends we were all free. All the shops have Xmas stuff in them, Xmas songs on radio and the kids don't know it's not December yet.

@Shade17 if it were March I'd be inclined to agree

And the OP isn’t??

Why are you so hung up on that small part @ohwowsers

@Shade17 this is a ridiculous comment to make. It is nearly December and as the OP says there are Christmas lights in shopping centres and Christmas items everywhere.

Its frustrating but it's his choice not to go. I think he's being a selfish prick and not thinking about his kids. It's an hour.