To ask if anyone else feels like a bumbling twat after EVERY interview?

[calmama]

Every time I finish a job interview I walk out of there feeling like the biggest twat. All I can remember of it are flashbacks of me rambling and bumbling through questions like an absolute moron. All the practice I do seems to go out the window. Really feeling it today after interviewing for my dream job.

AIBU This never happens to me. Toughen up.
YANBU Same here, sister. My commiserations.

Not unreasonable
Oh the shame I feel remembering some of my past interviews.
A fairly recent one which was for a change of role in my current workplace (and therefore being interviewed by my current manager) I think I forgot how to speak - I kept sipping from a empty water glass which my manager kept offering to refill to which I said 'no, it's fine' a dozen times!

YANBU! I had an interview today (well, technically yesterday now) and I came out of it cringing. I'm in Education and you generally find out how you did on the same day, the following at latest.
5 minutes after I came out, I saw my phone ring. I thought 'oh bloody hell, do they really have to reject me quite so promptly?!'
Turns out they'd interviewed me last, and I was their strongest candidate, so they were able to offer it to me minutes later.
I couldn't believe it and genuinely thought I'd fluffed it. I'd had another interview a few weeks previously - which I thought I'd aced - and was rejected.
So don't be too hard on yourself as you just don't know how it'll pan out!

Oh that gave me a much-needed laugh @HoldMyLatte. Did you get the job?

@mycatisannoying Well done! And thank you. I’m honestly on the verge of tears. The self-loathing is real.

I have no idea how I got this job and can only assume I was the sole candidate.

I stayed in a job for 14 years because I couldn’t face the self-flagellation of attending interviews. The money was outstanding which softened the blow.

@calmama no! 😂 and the worst part was that I still have to see my manager everyday.
Why do our brains like to remind us of our twatness? Like why do I lay in bed at night and think "oh remember that time 12 years ago where you humiliated yourself... you bellend"

I’m absolutely crap at interviews and prone to mishap. I have hypermobility and once dislocated my knee and fell over walking into the room. Another time I tried to open the water assertively and it was sparkling and sprayed everywhere. I have an interview on Monday . . . God only knows. It has made me more resilient in other areas of life, because nothing else feels as shaming.

Me after every interview. In fact I’m at the stage now where despite wanting to progress a bit further in my career I’m not sure I want to put myself through the stress of anymore interviews just to see people I feel are less suited to a role get promoted ahead of me all because I can’t handle my interview nerves or the inevitable post-mortems.

When your company outsources promotion boards and hiring is by far the worst. They give you ridiculous things to do . Not linked to the job , testing you on computer skills not on analysing data etc as you are trying to use computer programmes you do not use at work. They want to see "how you think" so instead of being able to just read information and work out what the issue with the problem is you are trying to produce a presentation or word document in that 30mins to analyse 8 pages. Real angry , upset

Not meaning to laugh at anyone else’s expense but I’m loving the waterless sipping, knee issues and sparkling water. @HoldMyLatte sorry to hear you’re still suffering. My crap interview efforts over the years are all flashing before my eyes tortuously. It must be career death.

I think interviewers are aware that nerves get in the way and we’re not performing at our best …I’ve got the pain of receiving feedback today, from an interview I had last week where I didn’t get the job…eeek…

I know it’s about learning and developing but it’s hard to hear sometimes …

YANBU!

My last interview was for a promotion back in 2016 and I decided I'm done after that, even if the pay is crap and at annual performance meetings I can't think of any more things to make up for the "career progression" section of the forms.

I'm dyspraxic so spilling water, falling down etc are very much everyday things and half of my energy is already spent at watching myself in public.

I'm also crap at"selling" myself as am very conscious of my weaknesses.

Oh gosh yes, me!!

I am truly awful at interviews. Really awful.

It's fight or flight in an interview and I just can't stop the panic and end up giving complete politician answers (ramble but don't answer / vague etc)

I've given up for a bit.

YANBU

I've interviewed many times.. and the interviewer often ends up feeling they did a crap job too.

After all unless you work in HR interviewing is not a core part of the day job either

@CrispsnDips I hope they do!

Good luck with your feedback. I never find feedback helpful as I’m usually just told the successful person was better suited. I’d prefer them to be blunt and say “Stop rambling” or “Talk louder” or whatever so I knew exactly what to work on.

I always know how well (or badly) I've done in an interview. Last year I was made redundant and went for 3 jobs. Each had lengthy processes of 6-9 stages (including interviews, presentations, assessment and exercises). My worst was not disastrous but just feeling rambling, unfocused or sounding like I was making it all up, imprecise.

For the last job I managed to pull it together by immaculately preparing - doing my research, preparing answers for all the potential questions and examples of experience. I was lucky though as I was unemployed (so had lots of time and mined their website extensively) and had been given Outplacemrnt support which included a mock interview and feedback (which centred on being too generic and not evidenced enough).

But I've done stupid things too in the past! Like spilling a cup of coffee all over the interviewers desk and forgetting major projects or pieces of work which would have perfectly answered a question but instead saying I had no experience in that area. Oh man.

I've also done a lot of interviews and seen some terrible ones. Like someone who was so nervous the candidate couldn't speak and her whole face dissolving into twitches. I had to advise her to have a breather and go out of the room, drink sone water and start again. Another candidate was drunk and stood up to make a speech during the interview and then, when my colleague escorted him out at the end of the interview he tried to snog her!

Supply teaching involving 150 random teenagers in a day, no problem.

Stick me in front of a small cluster of adults asking me questions about what I do and my guts (painfully) liquify, my mouth dries up and I struggle to speak (no matter how much water I try to drink) and the whole physical stress cycle makes it worse.

It's even happened when the job is mine, no other candidates, and it's just a formality with people I know and get on with.

Yep! I had an interview this week, I had been preparing for a week, my presentation and work task went really well, but the interview was still awful, at one point they actually told me to stop talking and to just breathe slowly… If it was a different company that would be fine, but I was interviewed by two senior colleagues, I have to see them every time I’m at work!

I only ever get jobs where there are no other candidates. I'm a complete disaster.

Yes, this is totally me!

I came out of the interview for my current job. I came out thinking of a million things I should have said. I was so surprised when they rang me later that day to offer me the job! My manager & our CEO have mentioned several times since they thought I interviewed really well. At least with interviewing at a new company you can leave and never see them again. I'm interviewing soon for a promotion but dreading that one as I work on the next desk from the person interviewing me!

You have to remember interviewing works both ways too - you are scoping out of you'd want to work there too. They are wanting you to do well! I interviewed a few years ago for an identical job in two locations - the first, they were lovely and welcoming and really encouraging. The second was a better location, and I felt the first interview would help me as I'd know the questions for this one.
However it was awful weather, I couldn't get parked, had to hike miles up hill to get there. I was on time thankfully and they were running a bit late so I had time to compose myself. I waited outside for my interview and could hear the panel laughing with the interviewee. I went in, thought I answered okay, but got no warmth off the interviewer (who would have been my boss's boss over either location) and I don't even think I got a smile let alone a laugh. I was the last interview of the day on a Friday, so I really don't think that helpsd. It was awful - I wanted the ground to swallow me up! I was actually offered the first job but didn't take it as I was offered something else and frankly didn't want to have the super grumpy boss boss!

I used to be seriously the world's worst interviewee. Absolutely dire. Two things helped, firstly a drink beforehand. I rarely drink so this definitely takes the edge off the nerves. Secondly, spending decades sitting on interview panels and watching everyone do the things I used to do and knowing why they were doing them. I also found it helpful to read advice on how to be interviewed.

Realistically these are unnatural situations and there's a bit of a (semi) hidden script. Once you realise that you are basically reassuring the panel that you're not a high-risk hire and have prepared some nice specific examples of the lovely things you do in work and have necked a swift brandy you are fine.

Strongly relate, Iam so bad at interviewsh. The few that I've done over Zoom have been much better because I can sneak a little glance at my notes! Would it be frowned upon to take notes into live interviews?...

I wish it was possible to just do the job for half a day or something and prove yourself that way, I'd be much better at it.

YANBU I feel your pain

@restisall absolutely not frowned on to take notes into a live interview! It will never look bad to show that you’ve prepared in advance. The only risk is reading entirely instead of making it a discussion, but if you’ve done it in Zoom interviews you know how to take a quick glance to make sure you don’t miss anything. I was once very impressed by a candidate who said “Do you mind if I take a moment to review my notes, I want to check I haven’t forgotten anything.” That’s the kind of calm, thorough thinking I’m looking to hire - it’s not supposed to be a memory test!

OP, I think I’ve felt like a rambling idiot after every interview I’ve ever done. Partly it’s just that talking about yourself for an hour is a weird experience (for most of us anyway!) It doesn’t mean you did badly. I hope you hear back from them soon!

I hate them, my last one which I got the job was a zoom interview thank the lord! I had notes stuck on the wall around my laptop so I could glance at them, was a game changer. I also had a pre interview with HR where I told them I was really nervous and was worried about the interview. She fed it back to my now manager and he understood when I was flapping around trying to think of something to say