To wonder if whole class parties are a real 'thing'?

[BaconCabbage]

Where do these happen? How do these happen?

It seems on mumsnet to be the norm for small children to have whole class parties in nursery/reception etc, but I haven't actually experienced this happening. I live in inner London so wonder if that's something to do with it?

I'd love it if this were a 'thing' but my daughter has a summer birthday so I can't try and set a trend or anything.

What is the norm for kids parties at your young kids' nursery or primary?

It happens here until they get into year 3.
It's literally invite after invite for 3 years.

I'm in the party business and most parties I do are whole class parties.

Not in my DC's school - this would have been 15 years back . Parties were around 10 children at soft play.

I think finances probably come into this .

Yes in reception, Y1 and Y2... then it was just a handful of kids

Yes in reception and Y1, still some in Y2, none so far in Y3. Now they choose particular friends and go bowling/cinema/laser quest/karting etc.

However I can see that it would be different if you live in zone 1 - not so easy to hire a church hall or play centre, and many people live in flats.

I did these when DD was 5 and under. It was actually a cheaper option than having a small number do an activity. I hired the leisure centre sports hall with bouncy castle and soft play stuff for £120 then had squash, made sandwiches and picnic bits and let them all run round like crazy things for a couple of hours.

Now it's activity courses, or bowling or build a bear at £30 a head, sometimes without food included.

Yes, very common here. All parties were whole class parties in YR (until covid hit), none in Y1 due to covid so we still had some in Y2 as they were postponed from covid. Otherwise the thing from Y2 onwards seems to have been about 10 kids at a trampoline park, soft play etc. Y3 seems to be 6-8 friends doing an activity, so numbers are gradually reducing. We live in a village so the whole class parties were all in the village hall. YR we were there every week!

DD is in reception and we’ve been to 4 so far. There may have been other smaller parties she’s not been invited to, I don’t know.

Mine is autumn born and we did a whole class party not just because “the done thing” but mainly because she’s only just started at the school so the friendship groups haven’t properly formed yet. It was the same at nursery.

It's £21.95 per kid at the weekend at our local one!! I boycott them though as they charge the adults to enter too which frankly takes the piss imo.

Normal here too, reception to about Y2 nearly every child in the class had whole class parties. Fizzled out a bit and was more selective thereafter though

My two children's classes have always had whole class parties from nursery age. Each party is shared between several children, and they're generally held at some neutral venue like a soft play place, with the costs split.

The school puts the classes together by age so there are anything up to about half a dozen birthdays every month. If there was a party for every child we'd be going to at least one almost every weekend - sometimes more than one - during "birthday season". This arrangement works really well as an alternative to that nightmare! It'll peter out when they get to about year 3-4, I should think.

We tend to have a little party at home as well, to which we'll invite relatives and family friends, as opposed to classmates.

They were not the norm when DS was in primary but there was over 70 in the year split into 3 classes in infants and 2 in juniors. The norm was around 10 friend to a party/activity maybe a few more if hiring a hall rather than soft play, laser tag or whatever. There was only one party where the whole year was invited. They hired the sports hall and had a disco and squash. No food.

Definitely a real thing in my commuter town just outside London.

In my experience:

• until age 4, parties are at home, or in a soft play centre with a few close friends.
• For ages 4-7, about half the class children have a ‘whole class’ party. The parents usually hire a village/scout hall, and hire a bouncy castle or a kids entertainer, and provide snacks. Party is 2 hrs and costs £200-600. The other half of the class can’t afford this, so either have a few friends round for a ‘party’ playdate at home, or take half the class to a play centre.
• age 8-10 parties the ‘whole class’ thing stop and parties are about 10-14 kids. For boys its nerf guns or laser quest, dunno what the girls are up to although some did a pony day at a local farm. Think girls become more into sleepovers.

Normal but not universal. Our reception year was still partially covid but I’d say 50% of y1 were all class, 30% 15-20 kids, 15% 8-15 kids about 5% really small with a few fiends. So far in y2 have had no all class parties and most seem to be 8-15 kids or 5/6 of them.

My son is in Y1 and has had no party invites at all. He is a popular kid with various friends according to his teacher.

We tried to have one in reception - got 1 RSVP and 3 kids came.

In London.

Glad it’s not just my daughter I already posted but my dd is also year one and not a single party invite including in reception. Every one has said it’s odd and I haven’t come across anyone else who has not had at least one party invite for their child was starting to think there was something wrong!

DC are in secondary school now so we’re going back a few years but yes they went to lots of whole class parties in reception and maybe a few in y1. Fizzled out once friendships became more established though.

It is nice to hear of someone else in the same boat - I also feel quite paranoid that I have somehow done something wrong.

My sense is that there are a lot of kids at my son's school with large extended families in the area so they do family parties instead.

My son's best friend asked if my son could come to his party and his mum later clarified perfectly nicely that actually it was just for his cousins

Everyone at DS's village school (class of c. 25 children) did whole-class parties for the first few school years, before cutting down to just the child's specific friends, or just boys, or just girls, plus some out of school friends, cousins etc.

Nothing particularly fancy -- the inevitable cheese or jam sandwiches and party rings in the village hall, or a local soft play. For understandable reasons, they weren't generally held at home.

DD started Reception in September. So far we've had:

• Her party in early Sept - 8/9 kids round to our garden with a bouncy castle
• Four whole-class parties, and an invite to one of the other class's parties because I'm friends with the mum (village hall/playgroup type)
• A Halloween party
• A pizza-making party, 6 kids
• Four whole-class parties from another school - she's friendly with the kids from nursery (same - village hall etc)

I'm glad she's getting on so well, I love having something to look forward to on rainy weekends, I'm happy to get to know the other parents... but phew!

I am hoping that it is a thing here, too. I can see that there are some factors against it. Finances - where I live is a mix of rich and poor - rich people who send their kids to private schools and poorer families who live in council flats (like myself) many of which don't have gardens. And hall hire is eye watering around here! I think I am feeling insecure as most of the girls in my daughter's class seem to live on the estate next to the school and already know each other, so would they then still want to do a whole class party? I hope so... probably worrying unnecessarily, have been feeling insecure about helping my daughter make friends since so much was cancelled during the pandemic.

No word of a party so far... maybe it will be more of a thing in reception? I will be trying to do one myself but my daughter is one of the youngest

Indeed, but I see why they do not want attention drawn to smaller parties, or why they don't want teachers involved in invitation giving etc. Our school has this rule. It doesn't prevent smaller parties but it does help minimise feeling of exclusion.

Reception and year 1 is my experience. Y2 onwards they started to be more selective.

Nope. Doesn’t seem to be a thing where I live. More just inviting child’s actual friends. But tbh most don’t seem to do parties outside of family gatherings. wonder if that’ll change as DS gets older?

Also parents all being pally & involved with the school doesn’t seem to be a thing here either. We all say hi etc but outside if that we are all just there to pick up/drop off kids. MN makes me feel that this is way out the norm haha