To ask you if I should return his money

[Taylor7000]

A family member who is 19 and is terrible with money, he spends like the money is burning a hole in his pocket buying take aways and unnecessary items, fair enough he’s a teenager, we are pretty close and last month he asked me to hold onto £500 for him and return it in December so that he could buy Xmas presents etc. he told me under no circumstances was i to give it back to him before December no matter what he said.

Well of course he has been asking for it back already and I have refused. I received a cheeky text from his mother this morning (who I am not so close to) calling me a thief and if I don’t return the money she’s calling the police. The money is here all accounted for in the envelope he gave me it in, I certainly did not steal anything.

my mind is saying give it back to him as I don’t need any drama when I was just fulfilling his request but my heart knows that come December he will be stressing out that he has no money for Christmas.

I guess my question is what should I do?

I’d give it back, if he’s crying to his mummy about it then he deserves to learn this lesson the hard way really doesn’t he. Why help him when he is treating you like dirt, and encouraging his mum to threaten you? Let him sort his own life out.

This.

He’ll probably just spend it on crap on 1st December anyway. Do you really want all this hassle? The mum sounds like a nightmare.

Give it back.
he needs to get a grip

Give it back to him and make sure you don't buy him a Christmas present as he won't be able to afford to buy any this year.

Return the money with a letter written saying you are returning 500 quid on xx date , sign it, ask him to sign it and confirm the return of the money.
Then kick the pair of them into touch

Just give it back. He's 19, he's an adult and needs to learn to behave as such.

Not your circus, not your monkeys.

Give it back. You don't need the headache.

I'd just give it back and be done with it. It won't be your problem when he has no money for Christmas presents. I'm also wouldn't help him with his finances again. He lost any sympathy when he went running to his mummy.

Explain to his bouncer what was said. Get him to collect it and sign for it.

Then do not do it again.

Wee arse.

Yep he’s now involved his mum who you don’t get on with. You tried to respect his wishes but he’s not respected you for doing what he asked you to do.

agree with PP, I’d be distancing myself from both of these drama llamas

Give the money back to him & block them both. Definitely not worth the hassle.

Give it back, let him blow it all on shite and tell him never to ask for your help again.

Give it back but tell him not to ask anything like this of you ever again, as you don't fancy being called a thief and threatened with police by his mum.

Give it to him, with instructions never to ask you a similar favour again

you did nothing wrong. if you're not up for the hassle, give it back. however, im petty and i would send the mother a nasty message right back about how you are keeping a request that was given to you and you intend to keep that request until december or she can notify the police.

nasty little thing that is to call you a thief for keeping a request. i agree with PP don't do this favor for him again.

Tell the mother her sons an adult and you're following his wishes.

But give him the money back and clarify in writing with him.

He gave it to you because he trusted you, unlike his mum. If you have something in writing then keep the money, otherwise give it back and don’t do them any favours. And block his weird mum who’s insulting you when her son has asked this!!

my heart knows that come December he will be stressing out that he has no money for Christmas.
Don't forget that Black Friday is coming up.

I guess my question is what should I do?
Whatever you do, get a written receipt for the money.

OP I've just had a thought. Phone him and ask to meet in person. Check he wants the money and it's not that his mom has asked him for money then kicked off because he has none to give to her and she's not bullying him into getting it back to give to her.

Give it back and simply say well don't be moaning when u have nothing left for presents.

He’s an adult, he need to learn to manage his money by himself. It was fine for you to help out and keep the money out of his way in the short term but now you’re been accused of being a thief I’d give it back to him and say it’s causing you too much stress, wish him well but ask him not to ask you to help again.

I'd give it back and say don't come crying to me at Christmas.

I'd message the mum to explain what he said to you, and ask him what he want you to do. After I returned the money, I'd block them both. No-one needs the hassle.

He said under no circumstances should you give it back until Dec 1 and you agreed.

Tell his mother that you keep your word, and so should her son.

Give it to him on Dec 1.

The lesson he learns from this will serve him well throughout his life.