Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

To leave 2 under 2 in the house while I walk to get dc no 3 from childminder 5 doors down the road

493 replies

threeisacharm18 · 14/11/2022 16:21

Quick pulse - as the title says I have 2 under 2 at home with me now. Dc No 1 is school age and gets picked up by the childminder who lives 5 doors from us.

Should I pack up the 2 babies in a pushchair to walk 2 mins up the road to get dc 1 or risk it and leave them in the bouncer while I run up the road to get dc no 3?

OP posts:
mandlerparr · 15/11/2022 20:36

Take them with. It will be nice for them to go on a little walk.

Popgoestheweaselagain · 15/11/2022 21:02

Take them with you. I left dd at home watching TV to go down the road to childminders when she was 7 and it was chucking it down. Those were always the times the childminder wanted to talk to me about something, while I stressed the house was going to go on fire with dad in it. It never takes 2 minutes!

lieselotte · 15/11/2022 21:17

Justrestingmyeyes1 · 15/11/2022 19:58

For all those saying ask the childminder to let the older child run home - I’m a childminder and wouldn’t allow a young child to leave my house unaccompanied by an adult, no matter how short the walk home is. It might only be 5 doors down but what if the child ran into the road. Guess who’d be prosecuted (rightly)?

What criminal offence do you think you'd be found guilty of?

MumNexDoor · 15/11/2022 21:38

Never ever leave them alone.. even if they are asleep, or no matter for how little while you will be away. May be ask a neighbour to watch them while you quickly return

Justrestingmyeyes1 · 15/11/2022 21:44

Ofsted would come down on any childminder who had allowed a mindee to leave their setting alone, like a ton of bricks. Childminder would also be at risk of losing their registration.

Years ago, a childminder friend of mine did something similar, with parental permission. Child was hit by a car and parent denied giving permission. Police, social services and Ofsted all involved.

Susiebee12 · 15/11/2022 22:28

Can’t even believe I’m reading this question

Wiluli · 15/11/2022 22:31

It depends on the area too and situation . I have a huge garden probably further away than 5 houses away and I have left my kids in the house while they sleep to go to the garage , drive to collect mail or the end of the garden to tidy up or play with my oldest .
Also leave the kids go pay for petrol and collect my middle child from school if there is room in the school car park and I can see the car .
it’s up to you to decide the pros and cons hun .

Wiluli · 15/11/2022 22:34

TheWayTheLightFalls · 15/11/2022 19:20

I have two under two (twins, crawlers) and a five year old. I routinely leave them in the living room when I go to the loo, and I’d also comfortably leave them in the flat while I go down one flight of stairs to, for example, get the online shopping delivery in - in both cases I can hear them and I know their usual patterns/go-to mischief. I also trust the five year old to call me in certain situations. This is in line with what many of my friends (parents of twins and singletons) do. My only point of anxiety is around making sure I always have my keys with me.

There are lots of very excitable responses on this thread which seem more heat than light. Like lots of other things this is one of those aspects of parenting where you need to assess your own circumstances, kids, needs etc.

Well said , common sense needs to prevail . I have friends who live in london also with twins and she cannot physically carry the buggy and both the twins so needs to bring the buggy while leaving them safely 2 minutes to then get them . I’m sure lots of people here would say that was wrong . But it’s common sense that as you do we all leave out babies unattended at stages as a shower or loo .

Unicornhat · 15/11/2022 23:24

I'm lost for words. Can't fathom how you could contemplate leaving 2 children under 2 alone for any length of time

JustAnotherManicMomday · 15/11/2022 23:29

Always best to take them with you. If you were in a jam and say they were asleep then with the eldest being of school age and its 5 doors could you not call child minder, both stand by your front doors and watch the child walk those few doors theirself? Or does it involve a road? No way should they be left alone

Mamanyt · 15/11/2022 23:51

Take them. No sense in tempting fate, and they will enjoy the short outing. Even in cold weather. Young children run "hotter" than adults. A very wise pediatrician once told me, "If you are comfortable, then your babies and very young children are slightly too warm."

Stewball01 · 16/11/2022 00:05

I think you know the answer now 🙂.

HowcanIhelp123 · 16/11/2022 00:09

Have you seen the videos from the fire service? A fire can take hold in 2 minutes. How quickly a child can choke? If you leave the door unlocked, if you're 5 doors away and one of them runs out, would you be able to reach them before they got run over? If you left if locked and you lost your key, how long until you could reach them again?

How long do you spend at the door, waiting for DC to get shoes on etc and walk back?

You can leave a child in the next room with the door open so you can hear and get to them quick but imo, leaving the house, out of sight and earshot, is not worth the risk.

Slv199 · 16/11/2022 02:54

What if something happened to you? It’s not unheard of for cars to mount the pavement and hit someone. You are now unconscious so can’t tell anyone the kids are left alone. What happens to them in the length of time it takes you to regain consciousness, tell someone and someone to get to them. Then you have to explain leaving them alone.

Autumn61 · 16/11/2022 02:56

Ffs ! Are you deliberately trying to wind everyone up? If social services were aware of you leaving your very young at home alone then it wouldn’t be an issue anymore as they would be removed . Why wouldn’t the childminder drop him off ?

sashh · 16/11/2022 03:48

HerRoyalNotness · 14/11/2022 16:24

How old is Dc1? Is there a sight line to your house? Can childminder send him to you on his own?

I was thinking that.

My neighbour at the bottom of the cul-de-sac I'm living on had grandchildren at the road the cul-de-sac is off and they used to walk down hand in hand, mum watching from one end and gran from the other.

It is a quiet road though.

Bebethany · 16/11/2022 06:11

@Wiluli, your mindset takes some beating? ‘It’s up to you hun’ 😳😳

OldMam · 16/11/2022 06:57

Do you leave the little ones when you go to the loo, or take them with you?

vdbfamily · 16/11/2022 07:03

Slv199 · 16/11/2022 02:54

What if something happened to you? It’s not unheard of for cars to mount the pavement and hit someone. You are now unconscious so can’t tell anyone the kids are left alone. What happens to them in the length of time it takes you to regain consciousness, tell someone and someone to get to them. Then you have to explain leaving them alone.

Every time there is a debate like this someone comes up with this argument about something awful happening to you whilst you are out. Yes, this is a risk.... but this is more of an argument to leave the kids at home surely. If you are hit by a car mounting the pavement, what chance do your children have of survival if they are with you? If you were to collapse unconscious, surely that could happen anytime, even when you are in the house with the kids and no one would know it had happened.
I would say, at that time of day, it would be better to just take them with you but if it was nap time and they were both safely in cots and settled, I would not wake them both to collect a sibling from 5 doors away.

Slv199 · 16/11/2022 07:18

vdbfamily · 16/11/2022 07:03

Every time there is a debate like this someone comes up with this argument about something awful happening to you whilst you are out. Yes, this is a risk.... but this is more of an argument to leave the kids at home surely. If you are hit by a car mounting the pavement, what chance do your children have of survival if they are with you? If you were to collapse unconscious, surely that could happen anytime, even when you are in the house with the kids and no one would know it had happened.
I would say, at that time of day, it would be better to just take them with you but if it was nap time and they were both safely in cots and settled, I would not wake them both to collect a sibling from 5 doors away.

Show quote history

How would it look if something did happen to you and you’d left the kids home alone? Wouldn’t you end up with social services involved?

sue20 · 16/11/2022 08:51

Endwalker · 14/11/2022 16:26

Five doors up? Surely you can see the childminders house from yours and could just stand on the doorstep while DC runs down to you, wave to the childminder so she knows you have him, then each go back inside your respective houses?

This! Don’t leave babies just not worth even a slender risk

sue20 · 16/11/2022 08:56

vdbfamily · 16/11/2022 07:03

Every time there is a debate like this someone comes up with this argument about something awful happening to you whilst you are out. Yes, this is a risk.... but this is more of an argument to leave the kids at home surely. If you are hit by a car mounting the pavement, what chance do your children have of survival if they are with you? If you were to collapse unconscious, surely that could happen anytime, even when you are in the house with the kids and no one would know it had happened.
I would say, at that time of day, it would be better to just take them with you but if it was nap time and they were both safely in cots and settled, I would not wake them both to collect a sibling from 5 doors away.

Show quote history

Also this post is totally about any possible danger leaving two unattended children, it’s not somebody happening to bring it up in an incidental way it’s the whole question and the whole request for an answer to that question.

sue20 · 16/11/2022 09:07

Wiluli · 15/11/2022 22:34

Well said , common sense needs to prevail . I have friends who live in london also with twins and she cannot physically carry the buggy and both the twins so needs to bring the buggy while leaving them safely 2 minutes to then get them . I’m sure lots of people here would say that was wrong . But it’s common sense that as you do we all leave out babies unattended at stages as a shower or loo .

Show quote history

when my child was about two I walked away from her as she was tantruming
we lived in a two level flat with a lower street door and an exit on the first floor. I went upstairs to leave her to calm down. The next thing I knew about 5 minutes later was a policeman at the door holding her hand. She had dragged something to the door climbed up and opened the Yale and let herself out. The policeman found her about 5 houses away standing on the corner of two very busy roads. Whole incident 10 mins. It’s all very well saying it’s over the top to be careful but when you consider the possible worse outcome…..?

Wiluli · 16/11/2022 10:25

Bebethany · 16/11/2022 06:11

@Wiluli, your mindset takes some beating? ‘It’s up to you hun’ 😳😳

Why because I think common sense is needed ? I literally leave mine longer to get the mail or get an Amazon order . Despite not leaving my house grounds , you do realise some love in farms , or bigger places . I’m willing to bet some leva e their kids longer to go to the loo or get their stuff in the car while getting ready if they live in flats or have no drives .
common sense is needed

Wiluli · 16/11/2022 10:26

sue20 · 16/11/2022 09:07

when my child was about two I walked away from her as she was tantruming
we lived in a two level flat with a lower street door and an exit on the first floor. I went upstairs to leave her to calm down. The next thing I knew about 5 minutes later was a policeman at the door holding her hand. She had dragged something to the door climbed up and opened the Yale and let herself out. The policeman found her about 5 houses away standing on the corner of two very busy roads. Whole incident 10 mins. It’s all very well saying it’s over the top to be careful but when you consider the possible worse outcome…..?

Show quote history

completely different issue here . Why would you walk away from your child and leave her in a tantrum ?