To be frustrated at my childminders comments on my sons food?

[Giraffle]

For context we’ve had this childminder since my first son was 18 months old, he’s now three and she also has my 10 month old since he was 6 months. She has been amazing and has also been a rock for me through PND this year. However…

my 10 month old I have been sending with a puree pouch, some snacky foods from Ella’s kitchen and a yogurt for his lunch. He didn’t take well to baby led weaning at all despite having 6 teeth from 6 months old and so we decided to ease him into finger foods and others through this way.

childminder mentioned she would like us to send a banana with him as she felt he was having a lot of processed foods. I was happy to do this but did explain he has home cooked meals of an evening. No issue though and started to send him with one.

Now the last few weeks he hasn’t eaten it, it’s not been opened. So it’s just going back and forth for show. (Not the same banana haha) he won’t eat other soft fruits like berries at all, and hasn’t been keen on banana either. So last week we didn’t send him with one. And she made a comment to “remind us” to send it and he needs to not eat so much processed foods.

i feel judged, despite explaining he has home cooked at home. She’s making it sound like we’re sending him with a bottle of coke and watsits!! Im also frustrated at the fact he’s my son and if that’s what I want to feed him, I will do so. Though I understand she has to give advice, being so judgey has just really made me annoyed.

She is also doing an MLM company job on the side which she has tried weekly to get me to join or buy products from and although I’m all for supporting friends and family I will not do it through that method.

anyway, AIBU to think this is unprofessional?

She is massively overstepping here in saying you can't provide something ready made. Tell her to shut up, do her fucking job and give him the lunch you have provided. What an absolute cheek.

At the weekends, I'm often out and about, so when my twins were about that age, I used to bring a thermos with their lunch. It stayed warm.
Now they're 2.5, I still bring a thermos of homemade bolognese or something, if I know we'll be out over lunchtime.

Dear Childminder, thank you for your concern over my child’s diet and as you requested I’ve added a banana to his lunch box. I’ve noticed it comes back each time..he is 10 months old, do you expect him to peel

*It himself.

Does she childmind several children? Maybe other children want the pouches and pots of food like you send with your son and she can't afford to supply them all with expensive snacks like that?
Freshly prepared fruit is much better. Can she try him with a microwaved, mashed apple or similar?

At that age all of mine liked a stick of cucumber to suck on - can you do that?

I would pour the pouch into a plastic pot - it’s not her business to judge the contents and if she’s so worried about her reputation just add a sticker with his name to the pot and job done. Ffs, she would infuriate me with the banana as well. You have your reasons for feeding him what you are, she should keep her beak out.

YOUR CHILD YOUR RULES. This applies to much in life and child rearing. Send want you believe your child will eat and what you want to pack in his lunch. Ignore any notes or questions from child minder. Another good thought for moms is …feed them when they are eating well and don’t worry when they aren’t. My cocoa rice crispy cereal chocolate pudding chocolate ice cream eating child is now a 21 yr old cooking protein and vegetable based meals for himself and drinking only water in his crappy “trash castle” college apartment.

does it have to be fruit? my dc never liked fruit but would eat veg ..if not banana (orrible things) . what about satsuma segments? send peeled in a tub....? apple slices? cut grapes :) watermelon? pineapple..??

I wouldn't feel offended she's just probably doing her job so she can say she has given advice for healthy options ect and to say she has adviced to follow government health visitors guidelines rubbish on foods ect !
As now adays health professions say children at specific ages should be eating having xyz and unfortunately childcarers have to like follow guide lines to.

If she'd hot physically forcing your child then I wouldn't worry even though it is probably frustrating having to buy something that's being wasted.
I think if it was me I would maybe give her the extra £2 or something for her to get them for him so you haven't got to take them to n throw.