To go to away for a long weekend with the girls whilst DH has the children?

[Sfuandtired]

I have the chance to go away with the girls for a long weekend to New York, DH has said to go for it and he’ll look after the kids ( 2 DS aged 11 and 16), we’d be using a travel voucher we got during Covid and I have some spending money already saved, we also have a family holiday booked together for a few months later.
It sounds like a no brainier but I feel incredibly guilty about it and as though I shouldn’t be doing it, I’m the primary carer for the boys and a very involved ( possibly too much so) parent and much as I’d love to go it feels wrong, in my position what would you do? AIBU if I go?

i can’t roll my eyes enough

Go

Go, they are 11 & 16 not toddlers.

Do you like martyring yourself ?

"I’m the primary carer for the boys and a very involved ( possibly too much so) parent"

That's EXACTLY WHY you should go.

The 16 year old could practically move out and live alone and I'm sure they will both cope without you - seeing as they have their other parent.

I really expected to open this and you say you had a baby and a toddler. Even then you could go if you felt able but I could see it being trickier.

Just go. Before you know it they will have moved out and you'll need to have those friendships.

I'd have my bags packed already!! Go and enjoy it. You deserve to be you as well as wife and mummy. They are more than old enough.

Bloody hell. Wrong on so many levels to ask this.

Go. Go. Go.

I did the same more than once, and mine were younger. They were fine.

11 and 16 years? And you can afford it?
Get going!!

I went for a long weekend with a mate to the US when mine were 3 & 1.

The fact that you’re feeling guilty is bizarre to me.

I thought your kids were little at first! Don't be mad, obviously go.

Why on earth are you asking OP?!

I've been going on weekends away without my kids since I stopped breastfeeding!

Thanks for all your replies, I was genuinely expecting everyone to say I was BU so this really puts my mind at rest, thank you

So if everyone said don't go, you wouldn't? 😂

FFS, just go! Your kids don't even need that much "looking after" at their ages.

Cripes you’re children aren’t far off leaving home.

something has gone a bit haywire if your thinking like this

😆😆

Omg go. Enjoy yourself!!

Hate to break it to you, they won’t notice you’re gone. And I mean that nicely. 😃

Have fun.

You wouldn't be unreasonable at all. It's a hell of a long way to go though just for a long weekend?!

I'm just amazed that your DCs have got to these ages and you haven't done it before.

Go and enjoy yourself FGS. You are an individual as well as a mother.

BlueRidge · Today 18:54
"I’m the primary carer for the boys and a very involved ( possibly too much so) parent"

That's EXACTLY WHY you should go.

This!!!!

They’re big kids, they’ll plan a brilliant boys weekend with DH and not miss you for a second!

Going back to you… Your eldest could be off in a couple of years to university or working and leaving home / travelling etc. In a nice way, I think you need to start letting the boys grow up and think about how you will cope without them at home. It will mean you have a better relationship when they’re adults and show them when they themselves are fathers, mums can jet off for adventures because dad’s are full parents too.