To be annoyed at the social media phenomenon of self-diagnosis and resulting explosion in self-diagnostic videos

[daretodenim]

If you don't have these videos popping up in your social media feeds, then I'd advise not to go looking for them! There's a never-ending supply.

AIBU to be fed up of the self-diagnosis trend on social media. Right now there's a massive push on "ADHD" (very, very loosely the real thing) - I even had a mental health professional's post appear today (with relief at finally some sense!) that "losing your keys" is not a diagnosis of ADHD. But there's ASD, PTSD and the one I think it's most horrific of all to do this with, DID (dissociative identity disorder) that people are doing this with.

I'm all for increasing awareness of things like ADHD and the autism spectrum in women in particular. In fact of anything! But surely - surely - if you think you have a condition by watching a 30 second clip of something, or even reading a few websites, then what you should do next is try to get a diagnosis. Not self-diagnose yourself!

I know that there are waiting lists. I get that. But if you're convinced, to the point of telling the world, then what about "I have suspected X" until you get one?

Because - and this is what gets my goat - is that all these people proclaiming to have X, identify as having X or whatever, with no actual diagnosis, and then offering advice as though they know what they're talking about, are making it harder for people who 100% do have the condition and got that diagnosis because they were having serious problems. Not because they felt like a wee label to brandish about. In the case of DID I'm actually out of words about it. Anyway, people see all these "5 signs you could have X" videos and either think "Ooh, that sounds like me" or "WTF, everybody has a diagnosis these days, they should just pull themselves together. We all lose our car keys." Then the next time they meet someone who says they have X, or hear of someone who does, they eye roll, quite understandably.

Just as an aside, what do you do if you can’t provide proof from childhood?

One of my parents is dead, the other has dementia and couldn’t tell you his own name. No other family. Certainly no school reports knocking around and in my 40s, I doubt my schools would have any records, it was all handwritten anyway.

Just curious really.

Yes I’ve thought this too. It used to be that everyone thought they had OCD, then it was anxiety, and now it is ADHD.

Disclaimer: I know these are real conditions and some people do have them.

I think the problem is the tendency to label and pathologise everything when in reality most things are a sliding scale and a very low % of people fall into a serious clinical diagnosis that affects their day to day lives to the point of not being able to work/function.

yanbu these videos are extreme in their message. I think better psycho-education all round would be much better.

I don't think that having a label should only be restricted to those who are so severe.

I have ADHD. I also have a job. But I am grateful for the label because I can seek out treatments and other individuals like me. There are a lot of things in life that I've struggled with, even though I appear fairly functional on paper.

Yes there are those who are affected more severely than I am, but I struggle too and don't think that I am any less worthy of the label than another.

It’s your choice to watch TikTok 🤷🏽‍♀️

Yes I’ve thought this too. It used to be that everyone thought they had OCD, then it was anxiety, and now it is ADHD.

Disclaimer: I know these are real conditions and some people do have them.

Yes, but people who do have them, like myself, started off by wondering if they did.

It was an article shared on here about ADHD in women 4 years ago then made me realise it. Up until then I thought ADHD was the typical climbing up walls and bouncing in your chair type of condition.

Being able to talk to other people in the same boat is what eventually led to me getting a diagnosis.

How do you think people come to seek help for themselves without the questioning? You don't just wake up one day and feel a change

It's a hard one. Ds has possible mild adhd, undiagnosed. Or is he just scatty? It feels a bit like less than ideal personality traits are now pathologised. How do you know if he's a kid who just needs to work a bit harder on the skill of focusing, or if he genuinely can't help himself?

I'm obviously not saying that's the case for many people who have very real neurodiversities.

I was told by the centre I'm on waiting list for that in that case it would be a working diagnosis rather than a full diagnosis.
I believe it's easier to get a private diagnosis under those conditions than on the NHS. I've seen lots of people who went private say they didn't need any evidence or family accounts from childhood.

You seem overly angry about this. It is irritating, don't use SM platforms like Tik Tok/Instagram andy don't be in Facebook groups where people do this and you might feel better.

I think it's the general cult of personality and 'identifying' as something you are not. It seems part of the general assumption that it's more important and interesting to have a label (undiagnosed) than just being yourself. The rise of filters, botox, body modification etc, influences has all fed into this utter clap trap. I have a seriously debilitating condition, diagnosed and it is tiresome when people go on about identifying as having it. I just see it as an indication of their lack of awareness though. Not on any SM so don't get the stream into my eyeballs daily.

I have ADHD, diagnosed by a psychiatrist.
It pisses me off that all the flakey people say they have it and can just self diagnose.
You can't say 'oh I've got weight gain, must be my thyroid' and bam there you go that's official.

@PorridgewithQuark
I'm constantly posting that the feelings people are experiencing are normal because what they're doing is simply hard. A lot of people don't want to hear that though - they seem to be more comforted by the idea that they have a syndrome or disorder and this will be solved by therapy and medication.

It's almost about seeking permission to ask someone else to fix difficult feelings rather than accept they're normal and either sit them out or look for more ordinary solutions, like going to language classes, joining a sports or hobby class or indeed meet up groups and trying to build a circle of aquaintences and get out doing things I think.

yes totally agree. There’s almost some sort of relief and a lack of responsibility from having a label imposed on us when someone says ‘this is what it is’.

We all have quirks, challenges, trauma (just being born is trauma - it’s a reality of being alive), crosses to bear. All our feelings and difficulties are valid based on our experiences and early programming and DNA. We all have a responsibility to learn our internal landscapes and work out how we can best be in the world.

I think self/over-diagnosis it’s a sign of how emotionally bereft we are as a society. Very few of us have had truly attentive parents who listen to our feelings and help us make sense of them.

I think people are waking up to this now and have got to a point where we’re unable to carry on as we are, so more people than ever are taking how they feel more seriously and looking to get to know themselves better in order to cope better and enjoy life more. that’s a good thing, but that emotional work gets muddled up with the western medical model.

I was told by the NHS psychiatrist that he couldn't give me an ADHD formal diagnosis because of the lack of childhood information. He is also prepared to start me on ADHD meds if he can find one that is safe for me to take with my other medical conditions.

I have suspected my DH might be ND for several years. I heard a radio programme talking about adults with ADHD and how that affected them, and it was a light bulb moment , almost describing a lot of DHs behaviours. I've since read about executive function (on MN) and it makes me sure he does have ADHD. He is not really sure and doesn't want to research ( he is dyslexic and finds reading difficult)

Selfishly, in a way it would help me as a partner make sense of some of the behaviours and patterns and probably feel less resentful. I've spent 20 years thinking perhaps I'm boring and not worth paying attention to (when he walks away in the middle of a conversation) but when I read about ADHD impacting listening skills it makes sense.

However because it is not me, then I have discussed with one close friend in confidence and anonymously on here.

Very interesting