Snoring

[JohnnyMcGrathSaysFuckOff]

Am I being completely wet or does anyone else suffer like this?

DH has always snored a bit. We used to joke that I'd say "turn over" and he'd do it in his sleep, and that would stop him.

As we've got older, it's got worse. We are now mid 40s, 3 DC young primary age. I work FT in a senior mgt role and earn c 75% household income. He SAH 2 days and works 3 d in a very worthwhile but lower pressure job for a charity.

For about 8 mos now, the snoring has got so bad it wakes me up multiple times a night and I can't always get back to sleep. I had to function at work in senior strategy meetings on 3h sleep when everyone else was fit and rested.

After raising multiple times, I finally lost it in early Oct and told him he had to find a medical solution or I was going to rent somewhere else to sleep. He finally went to the GP who gave him a steroid spray that seemed to work. It was amazing and I had 3ish weeks of some sleep, if not always great.

Now we both have a bad cold and it's started again in spite of the meds, as he's so blocked up. I've ended up sleeping on a camping mattress in the living room as so desperate for rest.

I don't even know what I'm asking.... just can't believe I'm a 43yo woman with a good job and I am camping in my own living room.

I dream of having my own bedroom. Anyone else had a similar experience? So so tired.....

Has he tried nasal strips?

You mean, in addition to the medication? No. Unsure they would help where steroids wouldn't?

Tbh I just feel my sleep is screwed generally after years of babies/ children waking at 5am/ plus the snoring. I just want peace at night....

I sleep with my 2 year old cos of the same thing. I get better sleep with a toddler than my partner. His snoring is horrendous and getting worse. I’ve been nagging him for ages to do something about it, but it took our eldest being in tears both nights of a 2 night break away in a hotel cos of daddy’s snoring, for him to finally ring the doctors. Now he’s on a waiting list for something. Sleep apnoea test maybe. It gets me down, that we sleep separately but my sleep is too important to me! We are lucky in that we are moving to a 4 bed house soon and will have a room each. Not very romantic. I really feel for you if you don’t have space other than the living room and I would feel some resentment about that. Will he go back to the doctors?

I am in a similar situation op. Dh has sleep apnea and refuses to seek treatment. He sleeps in spare room and I can still hear him even if the door is closed .

Can you let me know the name of the steroid spray? I will try to convince him to ask go for it .

One of my friends and her child had a surgery for this not sure what it is called some nasal bone thing and that seems to help reduce her and her son's (8)snoring.

I moved out of our bedroom 11 years ago and it saved our marriage. My husband snores like a bull seal, thrashes about like a fish on a hook and goes to the bathroom twice a night. Move to a house where you can have your own room! My biggest issue now is when we go on holiday. I try to book self catering with 2 bedrooms, but when that's not possible I have earplugs and use soft headphones over the top, playing white noise. He's never done a single thing to address the issue.

I have had a similar problem. Due to a combination of me being easily woken in the early hours and his snoring I ended up sleeping on the sofa a lot and was struggling to get up in the morning for work.

I now wear wax earplugs every night and I take an antihistamine before bed which helps me sleep better. If he has a cold then we sleep separately (he goes on the sofa or has my ds bed). Will your dh sleep on the camping mattress so you can get a proper rest?

Same problem!! Feel for you OP. What is the name of the nasal spray?

Separate bedrooms. DH complains that I snore but so does he. With separate rooms we both get a good night's sleep.

As you are clearly working more hours, and doing a more responsible job, I would tell DH that HE sleeps on the camp bed until he finds a solution to the snoring. However, ultimately as others have said, the only answer is to have separate bedrooms. It doesn't have to spoil the romance, just spend the evening together, go to bed a bit earlier than normal for a cuddle if that's what you like to do, and then when you're ready to sleep, one of you goes to the other bedroom.

Separate rooms have restored my sanity. DH and I have been in separate rooms ever since we moved out our one bed flat 4 years ago. We've only been married 6 years. I now co sleep with my toddler and get a better night's rest that way. In his defense I also snore like a bear apparently, so if we ever have to share a bed again I think we'd both need to do something about it

My OH snored really bad from when I met him. I realised that he would stop sometimes for 30 seconds and then carry on and the twigged it was more than just snoring, it was sleep apnea.

Could this be with the case for your man?

We're the opposite in this house - I'm the terrible snorer & OH is a light sleeper! We were both miserable, him as he couldn't get to sleep/was woken by the noise & me, because I had a disturbed sleep with either him nudging me every 20mins or throwing himself about the bed frustrated at not being able to sleep.
I now have a soft gel mouthguard recommended by a dentist friend that I wear most nights which stops my jaw/tongue from dropping backwards and helps with the worst of the snoring. OH also wears gel earplugs to block out any noise I do make.
Generally all well and good & we both manage to sleep.
However, times like this week where I have the most horrendous head cold complete with hacking cough & blocked nose even the mouth guard isn't helping so we're taking it night about to sleep in our bed. When I'm in our bed he sleeps in the spare bed & when he's in our bed I sleep on the couch - way comfier than the spare bed!

DH and I would likely have broken up by now because of this. We were fighting in bed and hated each other the next day. He moved into the spare room and we got married last year! We have more sex as well as we don't hate each other any more.

Ha e no idea what your finances or jobs has to do with this! Lack of sleep is debilitating whether you are a high flying exes it a stay at home parent.
Separate bedrooms is the key. Do you have room? Maybe think about a bigger place.

And I think we both snore not just him

I tried lots of things for DH. Nasal strips etc and actually what worked were Bose sleep buds. Would not be without them EVER!

My husband is also like this. 37 and he snores like a warthog. He hasn't really done anything to sort it so I hope we can afford a house with a spare room one day. I have to ram ear plugs in so far they almost touch my brain.

@JohnnyMcGrathSaysFuckOff Take a look at laser treatment for snoring- I had a consult with a private clinic in London, and although not cheap, the reduction in loudness is significant and the procedure was also highlighted on Channel 4s ‘Embarrassing Bodies’ for producing great results . Also google the Sommenwell sleep guard, again not cheap but proven to reduce : eliminate snoring and teeth grinding.

My DP literally sounds like a walrus being strangled to death.

He sleeps in the spare room to prevent an actual homicide.

You have my sympathy, broken sleep is no fun.
I have two friends with this problem and both sleep in tiny little box rooms. I find it so selfish that the problem gets to stay in the comfy bed!

This made me laugh. My dream is a spare room one day!

My husband snores too. At the first hint of a snore i get out and go sleep in the top bunk of my daughters room. Husband gets annoyed and says i should just wake him up but then he falls asleep and starts again!! So I'm supposed to be repeatedly woken up just so i can kick him and tell him to roll over.

This made me laugh so loudly.

I have eggz earplugs and they're the best I've had. Not overly expensive but definitely worth a try.

YANBU.