Feeling so guilty over not being able to afford Christmas

[elm26]

My DH and I have prioritised paying off our debt for the past 11 months.

We have about another 6 months of paying it off to go and we are due our first baby in May.

We also need to move to a 2 bedroom as we have no room for any additional stuff such as a cot or a pram.

My family go all out at Christmas, even for the adults and I have done this too since I started working at 16.

We simply cannot justify buying everyone presents this year and will just be buying for the children (18 and under) in the family.

We are volunteering for the vulnerable and elderly with some friends this year so won't be with any family for Christmas Day but I still feel so guilty and sad not getting everyone a gift. I know next year will be the same with a 7 month told.

Does anyone have any ideas of what I could do? I was thinking of making festive shortbread in batches for the adults and putting it in a nice gift wrap etc.

Suggest a secret santa, it's what the adults do in our family. Saves a fortune.

The best thing you can do in this situation is change the narrative around Christmas. Just because it's always been done one way doesn't mean it always should be.
Contact your family and explain that Christmas as you've always done it is too expensive and you will be doing things differently. Shortbread sounds like a lovely gift, I'd honestly be thrilled if someone baked me something!
Do you even need to buy for other people's kids? Those kids are presumably going to get lots already from Father Christmas/their parents/their grandparents.
In my family, the kids get presents from Father Christmas, the adults all get one present which is done as a secret santa, and we all make an effort with that so no one gets a rubbish last-minute gift. Then our focus is on spending time together, as that's what is important to us all. None of us need more "stuff".

The shortbread is a lovely idea! I'd also much rather any family of mine get out of debt and make ready for their baby.

The adults in our family have already had the 'this is going to be a low key Christmas' with heating etc getting so bad, and it will be little nice and simple things just like your shortbread.

Honestly there is enough tat in the world. Shortbread sounds great with afternoon tea on Boxing Day.

Feel no guilt. Indeed as you are volunteering over Christmas seems even more of a reason not to spend a lot, you are thinking of those less fortunate.

Let others know now, perhaps ask them to make a charity donation instead of giving you presents.

I'd love the shortbread!
On another note, we do Secret Santa between all the adults. Saves everyone getting a cheap rubbish gift and/ or spending a fortune. We set an amount and it goes very well. May be worth a thought.

Home made short bread is fabulous I used to make it years ago lovely present I’d love it if I got home made anything.

We haven’t bought for adults for years because it just wasn’t viable money wise. It’s fine and making shortbread sounds like a lovely idea.