Eating with a knife and fork in the wrong hands

[Getabloominmoveon]

Just sat in a cafe next to a whole family eating with their fork in the right hand and knife in the left. On the other side a young guy was struggling to chop up his food with just a fork. A few weeks ago an adult friend of mine admitted she didn’t know which way to set a table.This is In the UK btw.

When did this start? Have they never eaten with a table set with cutlery? Don’t people teach their kids how to eat properly any more?

At the risk of sounding like Hyacinth Bouquet AIBU to think that this is a basic life skill and people should eat with their cutlery in the right hands (unless left-handed, different cultures, Americans and all the other caveats of course).

Yep. Im right handed, I write right handed but do everything else left handed.

I hold the fork in my right hand.

School dinners (in the 70s) were full of dinner ladies swapping my knife and fork around for me, until my mum went down there and gave them a bollocking.

Both my son and dh are left handed .. they eat the correct way . I taught ds and he has sn so it's entirely possible .

Of course people can do what they want but it's not because they are left handed . Someone somewhen didn't teach them the ' correct ' way to eat .

I saw my food and I have the knife in my left hand

Why would you think you couldnt?

Wow, to have a life where it mattered what hands someone used for their cutlery. Just a thought - maybe we could sort out the dilapidated mess of our government, the NHS, environment, social care, cost of living crisis and war. Then come back to me.

Booorinnng!

Lets talk about fish knives instead!

DH is right handed, but his mum was left handed, when she taught him how to use a knife and fork as a child, she naturally taught him left handed. So he eats left handed.

Well you made me laugh at least!

But why is holding a knife in your right hand the correct way?

No one has answered this yet.

@MrsDooDaa because it's English etiquette.. not sure who made up the rules in the first place .. I was brought up in a middle class British family and it was deemed bad manners to eat with your knife and fork in your opposite hands ..

As I said I don't care what anyone does but it's a lazy excuse that it's because you are left handed . I taught my son the 'correct ' way and he has exceptional eating skills because I spent the time and effort trying to make him .

Many children with sn don't eat well and with their fingers and I personally didn't want that .

Each to their own though

Its not an 'excuse' and there is no 'correct' way

www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/style/miss-manners-forks-history-is-not-a-big-mystery/2011/09/01/gIQA0kYNaK_story.html

This thread is like my worst nightmare coming to fruition! I’m RH but eat ‘wrong’. As a child the whole extended family would tell me I was cackhanded (hate that phrase) and it’s really stayed with me, at restaurants I do find myself looking around In case anyone’s noticed - if I saw OP staring at me aghast I’d be devastated to be honest.

@buttons123456

But you can make the same argument for teaching all children to write with their right hand. We don't do that anymore.

If etiquette is the only reason then OPs Hyacinth Bucket comparison is correct, but it's not exactly someone to aspire to.

Most people will find it easier to hold the knife in their dominant hand if using a knife and fork together, and presumably if eating something that doesn’t require a knife, like risotto, it makes sense to then use the dominant hand for the fork, just as you would for a spoon for pudding or soup. Better coordination: less risk of spills. That is the logic for the convention.

The American way of doing things seems long winded but there’s nothing inherently unpleasant about it, and surely the only point of etiquette is so that you don’t disgust people you’re eating with?

Noisy chewing, talking with mouth full and dropping food everywhere would put me off eating with people. Which hand they hold their cutlery in unlikely to register.

And of course let’s all remember that the queen drank out of a finger bowl rather than embarrass a guest who made that mistake. A lesson there for some on this thread :-)

I eat with my knife in my right hand and see it as a blessing, the reason being that the insufferable bores of this world swiftly identify themselves via a pointed remark, or a raised eyebrow, and can be given a wide berth at all future gatherings.

You just have to realise that people like that have very very tiny minds, laugh at them. This thread is hilarious

Particularly the post which talked about her high falutin daughter being able to know what to do with soup.

I mean fork in my right hand!

Have you actually heard yourself 😂 'correct' way.. Jesus

Surely you haven't lived under a rock though .. it is the normal / correct whatever term you want to use to eat with your fork in your left hand and your knife in your right

I didn't make up the rules , I'm observing them 🤷‍♀️

I'm challenging them.

😂😂😂😂😂😂

Yes definitely the only reason he has "exceptional eating skills" is because he raises his fork to his mouth in his left hand.

If he swapped hands, and dared to use his right hand for the same task, he would almost certainly drop the fork half way up, scoop up his baked beans, fling them at the wall, gulp down his water, strip naked, gurn, deliver a loud grunt and run round the neighbourhood terrorising the pigeons.

More than half of the world eat with their hands.

I'm appalling. I never use a knife, why would I when I can turn my fork sideways for cutting.

Less washing up afterwards.

I lay it out the correct way at the table.... (if I bother to set it). But once I'm eating, I swap hands throughout the meal.

You can't cut some meats/foods with a fork side. Surely?

Like, steak?

@Peashoots

I'm not sure what it was in my post that provoked the cackling.

If people want to put their children in a position where they will be judged for not knowing how to handle cutlery or eat soup in different cultural settings, that's up to them, but they should realise that they might be holding their children back and ask themselves why they would do that.

The belief that the main thing is getting the food into your mouth, and none of the rest of it matters and can be ignored is akin to saying grammar doesn't matter, and cultural capital isn't for you.

Many children with sn don't eat well and with their fingers and I personally didn't want that .

Has it not occired to you that some children (and adults) with special needs can't use cutlery comfortably, or at all?