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AIBU?

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Original poster

Taking 10yo out of school swimming lessons

109 replies

Pho11me · 28/10/2022 15:36

Hi all,

I don't want my 10yo DD to take part in school swimming lessons, however the school are insisting she should do it. Due to moving school she's not had lessons before and when we tried to teach her younger she gained a phobia for being in the water so we stopped.

The reason we don't want her to take part is she talked about how embarrassed she'll be as the only child wearing swim armbands in the school lessons. We've said to school we'll take her swimming independently for her to learn as I'm aware how important a life skill it is, but she and I don't want that embarrassment on front of her peers.

So should I be allowing school to take her to the swimming lessons, knowing that she'll be the only one in armbands and as she'll not get individual attention she'll have they'll for numerous lessons, or should I double down and insist she doesn't take part?

OP posts:
Treaclemine · 28/10/2022 19:25

Armbands on small children get the arms too high in the water, so difficult to get a good stroke downwards - perhaps in the high school that wouldn't be a problem. They would also exacerbate the legs going down.
Our pool had a bunch of aids which helped - there were small floaty flying saucers which the children could move along by blowing them. That could be done in the pools where there is no really shallow water, and the children have their feet down.
Being in groups opened up some other possibilities, but one thing could be done with mum in the deeper water. Mum crouches down so her shoulders are level with the water. Child puts hands on mum's shoulders and swims with their legs. Mum can put her hands under the stomach for extra support, and walks backwards as the child pushes her.

LindseyHoyleSpeaks · 28/10/2022 19:47

You can’t opt out. It’s a national curriculum requirement (those in year 6/leaving primary have to be able
to swim at least a length). You should have done an intensive course this half term. That’s what most people round here have done given the mess Covid left everyone in. There are very few who now can’t swim at all.

Original poster
Pho11me · 28/10/2022 20:07

Treaclemine · 28/10/2022 19:25

Armbands on small children get the arms too high in the water, so difficult to get a good stroke downwards - perhaps in the high school that wouldn't be a problem. They would also exacerbate the legs going down.
Our pool had a bunch of aids which helped - there were small floaty flying saucers which the children could move along by blowing them. That could be done in the pools where there is no really shallow water, and the children have their feet down.
Being in groups opened up some other possibilities, but one thing could be done with mum in the deeper water. Mum crouches down so her shoulders are level with the water. Child puts hands on mum's shoulders and swims with their legs. Mum can put her hands under the stomach for extra support, and walks backwards as the child pushes her.

DH is taking her tomorrow and he might just put her in the pool without armbands and just keep hold of her at all times, this would be a big step for her as we've barely moved off the sides, so not sure she'll get that far before the lessons

OP posts:
Jumpinjackkflash · 28/10/2022 20:07

We had a similar scenario this year with Bikeability at school. Our DD9 really didn't like learning to ride a bike and would get quite distressed so we didn't force it. Then came the problem of the bike lessons on road safety they do at school. On the day there were 5 of them that couldn't ride a bike. The Bikeability people were amazing. Got 4 of them out of the 5 riding bikes within an hour. She's asked for a bike for Christmas and riding an old second hand one in the meantime to keep her confidence. Put your trust in these people she will not be the only beginner

Barbie222 · 28/10/2022 20:09

Like pps have said it's not something you can withdraw from if you're school educating.

notmyrealmoniker · 28/10/2022 20:25

Send her. She won't be wearing arm bands as she'll stay down the shallow end. Being with her peers she will just follow the crowd and get on with it. Only consider taking her out if a genuine phobia develops. Pandering to her now just increases her anxieties

Unseelie · 28/10/2022 20:40

Oblomov22 · 28/10/2022 15:59

YABVVU
She is exactly the child these lessons are for. She can't swim. You should've made sure she could but you haven't. This strategic thing put into place, is to catch those that can't. This is what it is doing.

This.

Sorry OP but if you were going to get her taught outside school, she’d already be a swimmer. She’s ten.

Vgbeat · 28/10/2022 21:17

It is part of the national curriculum that children should be able to swim before leaving primary school. When I went last time there were a few who couldn't swim and by the end they were all able to.

user29 · 28/10/2022 21:21

It is very unusual for a 10 year old not to be able to swim.

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