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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Going home airport etiquette

54 replies

ReasonablySane · 25/10/2022 14:40

I recently flew overseas to meet a friend (short-haul city break) in her country. She met me at the hotel we were staying in and we had an overindulgent amazing first night (2am) and a very quiet second one (in bed by 10:30). We aren't as young as we once were.

Having had an early night, was it too much for me to expect that we would do something on the morning/lunch of the day I was due to fly home? She knew that my flight wasn't until the afternoon yet left straight after breakfast and made it home to her family by lunchtime. I know this because she texted me.

I made it home to my family at 7pm having spent most of the day on my own. Had I known this was her plan i would have booked an earlier flight. I can't help but feel miffed. AIBU?

OP posts:
RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 25/10/2022 14:43

YABU - you should have spoken to her/made plans.

thelobsterquadrille · 25/10/2022 14:43

I think leaving after breakfast is reasonable of her.

Whataretheodds · 25/10/2022 14:49

Did you discuss plans and flight times with her?

PuttingDownRoots · 25/10/2022 14:51

When visiting friends abroad, people often forget that their friend isn't on holiday. But instead having to carry on in normal life.

Back home to family... going back to family responsibility.

ClocksGoingBackwards · 25/10/2022 14:52

It’s not something you should expect, more something that should have been discussed when you were booking in case she had to get back for some reason. But saying that, if you were my friend flying in from abroad, I’d expect to ‘host’ until it was time for you to be back at the airport.

LIZS · 25/10/2022 14:52

Presumably you had to check out in the morning, so time to head off.

notanothertakeaway · 25/10/2022 14:52

I think that was a bit off, but lots of people would consider the weekend over once you checked out of your accommodation

IglesiasPiggl · 25/10/2022 14:53

It sounds more like a mis-communication. Did you suggest lunch beforehand when booking your flights? If not, then she probably assumed you were leaving earlier and had things to catch up on at home.

SheWoreYellow · 25/10/2022 14:55

You should have asked when she needed to be back by - and so which flight to get.

WaltzingWaters · 25/10/2022 14:59

I do think it was rude of her as you’d flown to another country to visit her unless she had said earlier (before you booked flights) she’d have to be home by x time.
Best to discuss it before booking the flights next time.

Tryinga · 25/10/2022 14:59

You flew internationally to see your friend, the least she could do is keep you company until you had to go to the airport. Very odd that she didn’t

AryaStarkWolf · 25/10/2022 15:00

Lack of communication when booking the flights really, although if she was driving and didn't have a bus to catch then she probably should have offered to wait around with you for a bit

luxxlisbon · 25/10/2022 15:01

Having had an early night, was it too much for me to expect that we would do something on the morning/lunch of the day I was due to fly home?

Did you not have breakfast together?
Did you tell her how much time you had before your flight?

maddiemookins16mum · 25/10/2022 15:03

I would have at least done a late breakfast/brunch and maybe shopping (but then waved you off to the airport).

BeautifulElephant · 25/10/2022 15:03

Did you tell her you wanted to spend the day with her? Did you suggest to her stuff to do that day?

thecatsthecats · 25/10/2022 15:09

Eh. What's her family in this context? Young children?

The older I get, the less I like staying til the bitter end of a trip. I have shit to do at home, and I like to unwind a bit from the trip. Back at lunchtime on Sunday would be ideal for me, and I wouldn't assume I was hanging out after breakfast unless it was prearranged.

PurplePixies · 25/10/2022 15:13

What did you discuss and agree or did you assume she was a mind reader?

Arayes · 25/10/2022 15:14

Were you just expecting her to make plans for you,when you didn't even mention it? Are you a child who can't speal or make arrangements for herself?

You were very silly not to discuss your plans and make arrangements.

Also, even if she left early, you could have taken yourself off to do something. What's wrong with being alone?

Bobbins36 · 25/10/2022 15:14

I always leave after breakfast to head home on a trip. Can’t stand travelling late and like to be early for any flights etc YABU

PinkyFlamingo · 25/10/2022 15:19

This could have been avoided if you had discussed it first!

Delatron · 25/10/2022 15:24

To echo others - this should have been discussed by both of you. You had spent money flying over to spend time with her so it was a bit rude to leave you to your own devices for the last day. But why, when booking the return flight, did you not check her plans?

I suspect she had loads to do at home and because you didn’t ask she just whizzed off.

Hobbesmanc · 25/10/2022 15:28

I'd be the friend shooting off after breakfast I'm afraid - I hate that hanging around thing. But I'd have been really clear when we were making plans that I wanted to be home for lunch time on the Sunday. I need that Sunday PM time to mentally prep for work, do washing and chores etc.

Sounds like overall you had a great trip so enjoy the memories

BeetFeet · 25/10/2022 15:32

You hung about by yourself without fitting anything fun in? Just because she left?

ChefsKiss · 25/10/2022 15:37

Classic miscommunication

She isn’t unreasonable, did she know when your flight was due back?

butterfliedtwo · 25/10/2022 15:50

YABU. It sounds fine, you presumably needed to check out of the hotel and get to the airport, and she probably had things to do on the Sunday. Stressed Sundays are the worst.

You had two days together, focus on that and remember to discuss expectations up front next time.

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