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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is it "unreasonable" to be this tired at 7 months pregnant? What could you get done / not get done at 7 months?

30 replies

QS90 · 21/10/2022 22:25

Am posting here as am interested in the pol result, as figures speak truer than comments (although I am very interested in these too!).

I am 7 months pregnant, with a part time office job Mondays and Tuesdays and a gorgeous two year old I look after the rest of the time. I don't want to complain as I love my life, but atm I am just SO KNACKERED and am beginning to wonder if it's normal and what other women managed to do at this stage in pregnancy?? I'm lucky (and touch wood!) I haven't had any particular pregnancy illnesses, except borderline anaemic (taking iron pills) with an enormous bump measuring 5 weeks ahead (GTT was fine).

Today was a pretty average day. Other than the usual feeding / changing of toddler, I did some painting with him and bathed him afterwards. I did three loads of laundry (just wash machine and tumble dry, nothing strenuous), cleared kitchen, went for a big shop and put it away, cleared kitchen, made dinner, cleaned out rabbits, hoovered through downstairs, cleared up painty messes. But am just so tired I had to stop for a cry midafternoon (away from toddler obviously), which I know is ridiculous. It feels like every, single time I have to move it's such a massive effort I don't know whether I'll manage it. I just feel so guilty and shitty about all the endless stuff that isn't getting done at hom, as well as toddler having more screen time than I would like, when I feel he deserves a "proper" main carer with all the energy and enthusiasm in the world to give him. I just can't seem to muster any more energy for doing a single other thing and am wondering if it's time to worry - will check with midwife too when I see her next week but interested in other women's experiences.

So please let me know from your experience;

YABU - You're doing a normal amount of stuff and shouldn't be feeling so tired (the tiredness is unusual)

YANBU - It's normal to feel this tired later in pregnancy, there's nothing to worry about (the tiredness is normal)

OP posts:
OctopusBreath · 21/10/2022 22:30

I'm sort of glad you posted this OP, not because I want you to be struggling but because it makes me feel less alone! I'm 6 months gone and have 2 very well behaved teens, I work mainly from home in a job I love, and I'm so blessed... But bloody hell I'm tired. If I go anywhere, I have to sit down for a while afterwards. I'm out of breath and I get emotional over nothing. I feel like all the pregnant women I see are climbing mountains or looking like models or do three hours of yoga, hold down a full time job and keep an immaculate home! There isn't much representation of the pregnant and knackered is there?!

Cw112 · 21/10/2022 22:38

I'm about 8 months pregnant now and honestly everything exhausts me so I think you're a bad ass for doing it with a toddler because all I can think about is thank goodness I don't have a toddler bombing about! I was convinced my iron test would come back anaemic but it was normal, for me third tri tiredness has hit harder than first trimester. Toddler won't remember all the extra screen time, they'll remember you painting with them etc so just let that guilt go you're doing a fab job and making a whole new person! Can your other half step in and give you a hand or would you have family that could take the toddler some afternoons for a few hours to give you a rest?

Cw112 · 21/10/2022 22:40

Cw112 · 21/10/2022 22:38

I'm about 8 months pregnant now and honestly everything exhausts me so I think you're a bad ass for doing it with a toddler because all I can think about is thank goodness I don't have a toddler bombing about! I was convinced my iron test would come back anaemic but it was normal, for me third tri tiredness has hit harder than first trimester. Toddler won't remember all the extra screen time, they'll remember you painting with them etc so just let that guilt go you're doing a fab job and making a whole new person! Can your other half step in and give you a hand or would you have family that could take the toddler some afternoons for a few hours to give you a rest?

To make you feel better I made a 25 min dinner sitting down tonight because I couldn't be arsed standing over the cooker.

BattenburgDonkey · 21/10/2022 22:41

Have they done a scan to check why you are measuring 5 weeks ahead?

Discovereads · 21/10/2022 22:47

I only voted YABU because I was never that knackered at 7 months along for my four pregnancies, even with the difficult pregnancy that involved fainting.

I would rather vote YABU to encourage you to call your midwife or OB and get assessed as to the fatigue and the measuring 5wks ahead should be investigated with a scan as well.

It is probably nothing, and you could just be fatigued or dehydrated- but I’d get checked out to be sure.

LadybirdsAreNeverHappy · 21/10/2022 22:49

There is no normal amount of stuff you can do or how tired you should be. Every person is different and every pregnancy is different. There is a horrible attitude that I came across when I was pregnant that you can’t complain about being tired or should just get on with things because other women do. It is total bs and should be ignored.

PersianStar · 21/10/2022 22:49

YANBU. I have 3 dc with gaps of exactly 2 years and then 13 months, it’s hard being pregnant looking after another one!
I didn’t realise how much I bent down or pick my children up until I was pregnant again.
it will also be your hormones kicking in and ‘mum guilt’ when I was that pregnant With my 2nd I didn’t understand how I could possibly love another baby as much as my first because she was my world. And I also felt guilty I was going to turn her life upside down with a new baby when she wasn’t really old enough to understand.
its all perfectly normal, try and get some rest when you can, which I know is easier said than done!

EvAlSa · 21/10/2022 22:56

I worked full time on building sites until my due date day with both of my babies.

I was exhausted. I was totally and utterly fucked. However, I wanted as much time PP with babies and was able to take a year off with both.

Thankfully both of mine were overdue so I got a couple of days "rest".

I was 100% fine 🤷🏽‍♀️ I walked around London for 3 days straight at 36 weeks pregnant in June. I think I cope well with pregnancy.

My best friend (pregnant at the same time) - was pretty much in bed from conception, God love her 😂

addler · 21/10/2022 23:01

I've had very different experiences. First pregnancy I felt great right up until giving birth at 40+11. I had lots of energy, was bounding around with full mobility.

This time around I'm absolutely fucking knackered. Can nap for three hours and then still feel like I could do another three. Sometimes I nap twice in a day, it's ridiculous. I feel useless and incapable of normal activities.

endofthelinefinally · 21/10/2022 23:07

What is your haemoglobin? I remember being absolutely exhausted at around 7 months and I had my routine blood tests and was almost at the point of needing an infusion. It really does make you feel dreadful.

MsCactus · 21/10/2022 23:07

I'm eight months pregnant (also on iron tablets as was anemic in second trimester) and honestly, I'm still working but it's got to the point where I can't get ready quick enough in the morning to go into the office because it's too exhausting. I WFH mainly but I sometimes go in for odd meetings and every time I do something like stand for 15mins in the shower, I have to go sit down to catch my breath because I get so dizzy.

Last week I tried to get ready quickly, got a taxi into work in the morning, then taxi driver had to pull over as I got heart palpitations and passed out. I don't have any heart issues (hosp have checked me) it was just from exhaustion from rushing around.

I'm managing though - my mum was bedresting from 28 weeks (we're both very petite height and frame) so I don't think pregnancy is super easy for either of us.

CaitoftheCantii · 21/10/2022 23:09

First pregnancy - felt fine, lots of energy (20’s)

Second pregnancy - permanent nausea, no energy, could never get enough sleep despite sleeping in excess of 10 hours every night (40’s)

MsCactus · 21/10/2022 23:10

Also, all this is from a low risk, normal pregnancy

Meatshake · 21/10/2022 23:16

From 7-8 months onwards in my second pregnancy I mostly spent my mornings doing whatever activities with my 20 month old, had lunch with her, a bit of housework and then had an afternoon nap at the same time as her.

It's physically exhausting. I definitely slept on the sofa while she pottered around the (childproofed!) living room quite a lot towards the end of pregnancy too. Lucky for me she was an easy toddler though.

NoodieRoodie · 21/10/2022 23:18

First pregnancy glowed, bloomed, was a magnificent specimen of a pregnant woman. Second pregnancy (due 10 days before DC1 turned 2) wanted to vomit every second of every day from conception to labour! I learnt to lie on the sofa with my eyes shut and still manage to switch on to the next episode of Bob the Builder by touch alone😂

QS90 · 22/10/2022 07:45

Thank-you all for the kind replies. It's really reassuring to hear what a range of things you all felt / were able to do. I think it's a shock to me, as was fine until theis last couple of weeks.

@OctopusBreath Yes - and cook every super nutritious meal from scratch, are perfect mothers to their existing children... I simultaneously feel like I'm doing nowhere near enough, but am over-stretched to the limit.

@Cw112 I hope so, re the screen time and painting! My OH is really very supportive and does what he can with housework and childcare. This used to be more, as we was self employed and worked from home. Due to the cost of living crisis, he's had to change job and is now out of the house 7am to 6:30pm Mon - Fri (as I know lots of people do, it's not just us). On Saturdays he does his old job 9am until 3pm. I feel bad burdening him with too much other stuff when he is in. His parents are very good with childcare, but do this Mon and Tues when I am at work. My family live hours away. Mum and dad were planning on helping if I got pregnant again, but have their own worries back home atm. Again, I don't want to burden them as they have a lot on their plate.

OP posts:
QS90 · 22/10/2022 07:54

As for size of bump / health things, they did test my for gestational diabetes and do a growth scan too. No diabetes, and new baby growing well (I know that's the most important thing). He's 60th centile. Sonographer / midwives just said some people grow bigger bumps, same as some have brown eyes or are short.

Had iron taken a couple of weeks ago - it's 108, and the threshold for amenia is 105. Not sure about the units. Will defo mention on my appointment on Thursday though, especially as have been having pains in my bump and feeling nauseous last few days. Worse this morning. Baby still moving plenty though.

OP posts:
QS90 · 22/10/2022 07:58

@NoodieRoodie and @Meatshake I wish I could nap on the sofa!! Did try it yesterday with Pirates Ahoy on (program of choice atm). My toddler just screams "MUUUUUUUUUUM!!!!" in my napping face, or uses me as a climbing frame with some complimentary (accidental) headbuts thrown in. Sure it will seem funny in a few years 😑

OP posts:
BattenburgDonkey · 22/10/2022 08:12

Just checking they had done a scan OP. I had polyhydramnios in one of of my pregnancies and carrying all the excess fluid around made me far more exhausted. But they’d have picked that up at the scan

Hello12345678910 · 22/10/2022 10:18

Haven't read the full thread so apologies if you've already covered what I'm about to right!

I was BLOODY exhausted the majority of my pregnancy. I finished work at 36 weeks (after that I could barely move!) I worked as a supervisor in an incredibly busy retail shop, on my feet literally 40 hours a week. By 7 months I'd pretty much stopped doing anything at home because I was bloody knackered - my other half changed the bed sheets, did the laundry, did the cooking, literally everything. I hated being pregnant (not that it would stop me doing it again!) But I was constantly exhausted!
I was absolutely amazed how different I felt immediately after having him!

On another note tho, will you be having another GTT? I didnt gain weight in pregnancy, I measured 1 week ahead. I rarely saw the same midwife twice so was sent for a late GTT (the midwife sent me based on my BMI alone) which I passed, admittedly by only 0.1 under "the cut off"
Baby arrived on due date - 1oz under 9lbs - alarms range because of issues breathing (was stabilised very quickly), however, his blood sugars were so low they couldn't get a reading. He spent a week on NICU, with a long line in his belly button administratering glucose.. it was awful, i couldnt hold him for 4 days of his first week :(
I wished I'd pushed for a second GTT...

Hello12345678910 · 22/10/2022 10:24

Bloody autocorrect.
I obviously meant write and rang

jjeoreo · 23/10/2022 08:35

OK so cut off for iron supps may be 108 where you are but in some parts of the country its 110. We are all different - when my HB was 110 I couldn't walk 20 seconds without wanting to cry (its normally 135). I would suggest speaking to GP about starting iron supplements or get your midwife to get in touch with them to do so.

TwoShades1 · 23/10/2022 08:46

Every pregnancy is different. I was loving it at 7 months! My hyperemesis had cleared up, pelvic pain hadn’t really started yet and I had a nice cute bump. So I don’t remember being tired.

jammydodgersforever · 23/10/2022 08:59

I was still working full time; getting on 4 tubes a day in rush hour and felt great. Not because I'm a superhero just the hand I was dealt - very lucky. Everyone is different, and there is no right or wrong.

QS90 · 23/10/2022 10:04

Thank-you @BattenburgDonkey and @Hello12345678910 - I will ask about both of these things on Thursday. It seems from this thread I'm far from alone, but doesn't hurt to check these things. The thing with poor baby going into NICU sounds awful, what a worry! Hope he is okay now?

@jjeoreo That's really useful to know about the iron too - I am taking Active Iron on top of my Pregnacare, but will ask about taking a higher dose and how safe it is. I've been making a point of eating more red meat too, but think I just do get anaemic easily.

OP posts: