DD wants to spend £800 on concert ticket

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DD (17) has just inherited £1800 from the sale of her grandfathers car who recently passed away.
She is autistic, and has special interests which change after around a year or so.

At the moment it's Taylor Swift, which is the concert she wants to buy a ticket for next year. She reckons it will cost £800 for a 'pit' ticket, where you will (might) be close to the stage.

In a few years, she will need to buy a car, and also needs a laptop.

How would you feel if this was you?
She is quite right when she says it's her money, she can spend it how she likes, but I think it is such a waste of a lot of money.
AIBU?

I don't think it'll be that much, I'd say around the 200 mark possibly be 300 at a push

Tell her its such a stupid thing to do. Utter waste of money. Point out to her that she needs to pay her car expenses and where will she get the money from.

would you object if she spent it on a holiday? What I’m trying to get at is do you think she should only spend it on practical things? I think there is a difference between people who value experiences and people who value more tangible, long-lasting things. I’m an experience person and my husband is not.

I’d be ok with a small inheritance being spent in this way on the basis that 1) she has researched and would get a lot out of the experience 2) TS is renowned for putting on a brilliant show 3) it’s the sort of thing she wouldn’t have been able to do without the inheritance and will remember her grandad for it. But I’d want her to realise that once
its gone it’s gone and so on her head be it.

Hang on- if she has a diagnosis of ASD, could she be eligible for discounted/special access tickets?

£800 doesn't sound right even if it's close to the front. Sounds like a VIP pass with food and drinks and maybe a red carpet!

I think if she's willing to work to pay for a car etc, then it's fair to let her use the money she has available to her now for something that she would need to buy in the next few weeks

What tosh.
I didn't know £1500 could get her so far. A laptop, a car, the insurance? Think people are living in the 70's.
Tell her to have fun. She can work for the rest.

It doesn’t sound like she’s done any research what do every if she’s claiming the ticket will be £800 (it won’t be anywhere close) and equally unlikely to be TS’s last tour.

Why is she specifically telling you it will cost £800? Do you think she’s planning to do something with the rest of the money but doesn’t want to tell you what that is?

Will she agree to put the 1000 in a VERY safe place so has it to put towards a car down the road? Could she agree that her Christmas present and birthday present will be the ticket up to say 200 so she may not need to spend that much?

Why wouldn't she? Shes autistic not thick.

My mothers autistic and always loved being in the heart of the action - pits, theme park crowds, festivals etc... not all autistic people are the automatic 'stereotype' of someone in ear defenders than can't handle being touched, its a MASSIVE spectrum.

The album isn’t even out yet let alone tour dates being announced.

based on the Harry Styles pit prices it won’t be £800’but maybe a couple of hundred - I may start laying the groundwork to prepare her for the fact that these tickets will be VERY hard to get - Harry Styles went in seconds. My dd bought rear standings for this summers HS concert and next years one - they were £85.

I would be prepared to bet this won’t be the last album!

I inherited 10k when I was eighteen.

I frittered it all away (including a trip to California, a piano and loads of art from the local gallery).

I would let her buy the tickets. A hundred times over, and try not to comment on what a waste of money it is. Which I would find really hard!

The reason being, having that experience made me super frugal and save up to buy a house during university, rather than taking out overdrafts/loans like my coursemates.

Ymmv of course.

I agree it her money to do with what she wants and would love it.
But, these artists are taking the fucking piss out of fans charging so much. Fans should go on strike and refuse to buy tickets at that price.

Taylors Reputation tour. Definitely over £500 for VIP pit tickets. But there was the regular ones which were about £150. Not resale!

Look at the mental capacity act.

The point is does she understand the full consequences of her decision . I.e. once it’s gone it’s gone etc.

It is actually irrelevant legally whether or not you think it is the right decision or not, just whether she understands the full consequences. Good luck 🤞

Because most grandparents would like their inheritance to be used for something practical. Even if it’s not true it’s better than her wasting it on an overpriced concert ticket

I'm a swiftie. Tickets likely to be £300 or so, she can get a free carer ticket if she's on disability benefits.

There's also no tour announced and won't be for a while. So it's not even possible right now.

Her money, her choice. I've never spent that much on a ticket but have certainly spent as much or more if you include ticket, travel, overnight etc.

Of course not... half the people I know have ASD, ADHD or other varients of disabilities (I myself have cerebal palsy).

2.9 million people claim PIP and thats a fraction of people with diagnosises (most people I know dont get PIP) for disabilities, do you think we can all just get a free/discount ride through life?

Thats not how the world works, we can usually get a discount ticket for a varified carer if we have one but not just a cheap ticket for ourselves.

The ticket won’t be £800 - maybe £200 max. She will struggle to get one anyway. No tour dates have even been announced. It’s her money, and frittering it is an important life lesson.

Of all the things to worry about, I’m not sure this is it.

As for posters saying they won't be £800. Black Pink tickets were between £371 and £650 each.

Oh, and they're now sold out.

@MissingNashville wow that surprises me considering it was 4/5 years ago too!

I think the main issue will be trying to get them😬

It’s a memory that will live with her forever, £800 isn’t that much really and it’s her money so I wouldn’t try to prevent her.

You learn to budget and prioritise spends by doing it (including bad/questionable decisions), not being told by your mother.

'(Amazing how she can suddenly cope when she wants to…)'

🙄

Often a scheduled event that you know is going to be loud is more manageable than unstructured, low-grade painful experiences like commuting or shopping. Sometimes you can lose yourself in loud, familiar music and it works as a kind of sensory blocking in the same way that headphones do.

I would focus on making sure she gets there/back safely, and that she has a plan for if there's a last minute cancellation or she gets overwhelmed at the venue. You will never win an argument with a special interest and there are far more expensive/dangerous ones than TS.