Chuggers/fundraisers should take your first "no" for an answer

[Parkingmoan1]

I've just been walking through the town centre on my way to catch a bus and was caught by one of those fundraising groups who accost you in the street.

As soon as she started talking to me I politely said no thank you, I don't have the time to talk and carried on walking. Instead of taking that as my final answer she chose to walk alongside me saying "I'm a fast talker" and continued her speech.

I felt a bit intimidated to be honest, she was quite loud and bolshie whereas I don't like confrontation and hate things like this.

I said I don't have any spare money, she said if I didn't want to make the one off payment to the cause (£25 bloody quid) the magazine they're selling is "only" £5.

I ended up buying the magazine just so that she'd leave me alone.

AIBU to think they should have to take your first "no" as an answer and leave you be?

Was it "Inside Success"? They're not a charity but are a social enterprise / CIC that raises awareness and funds for people affected by knife crime. I've seen lots of very positive tweets about them and also lots of very negative ones. They are now on my radar as a thing to learn more about.

I think they might be subject to different fundraising rules from those that govern 'chuggers' (charity 'muggers'). Maybe worth letting the council know if their staff are intimidating people though.

While a firm 'no' and keeping walking should lose them it's not always that easy. As others suggest it can be useful to have a few prepared polite-but-firm phrases / objections to hand: - that you don't do direct debit, that you'd need to do your due diligence on the breakdown of how they use their funds, that you're recovering from an illness and want to keep moving, that your hearing / tinnitus [etc] is really bad at the moment, that you'd need to check with partner / parents / sibling / financial advisor before considering making any payments, that you're late for a train or meeting, you have no wish to have a conversation now etc etc.

Personally I quite like "I'm not at liberty to discuss the matter" ;)

Did you pay with cash or card for the magazine?

Jo

I ended up buying the magazine just so that she'd leave me alone.

Well her technique worked, didn't it? Because you bought. You just keep saying no. Do not engage. Ignore.

I just say no thank you and carry on walking. The odd few have tried to follow me but I just ignore them and they give up. I've already said no.

I hate chuggers too OP and I know you said you don't like confrontation but think of this sort of scenario as the type of place to practice standing up for yourself. No need to buy the magazine if you don't want it, just a firm but polite no thank you and carry on walking ignoring her. You don't know her, will never see her again so perfect place to practice those boundaries.

F* me I can't believe the charity 'trains' them to do that, that's appalling!

I agree- but you shouldn’t have bought the magazine. You’ve validated her approach now, it’s worked, so she’ll do it again.

This ^

Yes, it would be nice if they took your first 'no' as meaning no, but they are desperate (as in they need to get paid, and no-one would choose cold selling as a job, would they?) and will do what works.

Chuggers get you in the street; the ones that come to your house are churglars

Yes thats the one, inside success.

It's the first I've heard of their organisation as I usually go out of my way to avoid anybody standing around asking for donations. They're always easily identifiable but I dropped the ball today.

I paid for the magazine with my bank card, contactless. I double checked that they were only debiting £5.

When I reluctantly agreed to buy the magazine she then tried to strong arm me into buying two for £10. I promptly found my backbone. The cheek.

After years of walking through gangs of these on my commute (3 on each side of the road) I now just say "NOPE." and march through. They pester me less in my 40s - in my 20s I would have to stomp on their feet to get them out of my way. They would be dancing in front of me singing stupid songs and making cutesy faces.

I hate them. They are relentless and aggressive.

Don't go to town much anymore though but I feel the ones knocking on doors have subsequently increased. I said no thank you, and closed the door straightaway the other day - he shouted through my window "how rude"!

And yet (some) people on MN mock anyone who refuses to answer the door to people they don't know/haven't invited/aren't clearly there for a legitimate business purpose.

Out on the street, it's more difficult, but at least then you can keep walking and get away from them that way! People aggressively trying to part me from my hard-earned money anger me, which makes it easier to not give a crap if I'm rude for ignoring them, or saying "Not today!" and leaving it at that.

Also when they are stationed in shops/ petrol stations that you want to use so you have to get by them.

It baffles me as to why shops agree to this. I don't know if they think it makes them look kind and community-minded, or if they just get browbeaten by the charities refusing to take No for an answer. I don't mind somebody standing to the side, waiting to be approached by interested people; but that's never how it happens. Somebody will rattle a tin under your nose and say something like "Help children with cancer?" and know that most people will feel to ashamed to ignore them.

Our local Co-op used to have a different charity every week - sometimes they would approach me whilst I was clearly actively shopping (looking at goods and comparing prices). It really put me off using that shop and I would often go elsewhere in preference.

I also hate it when you get local groups - Guides, Scouts or whatever - who immediately start packing your bags without asking, clearly for a donation. I'm fussy about how I pack and I don't want a child throwing tins on top of eggs or salad. I don't object to supporting them with a quid (still feels a bit pressured, though), but I'll pack my own shopping, thanks!

Best suggestion I can think of, once they've deliberately ignored your declension, is to sing 2 Unlimited at them loudly, without stopping. "No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no thank you!" That song is irritating enough just as a song, so hopefully they'll get the message. If not, ramp up the volume with a "Techno, techno, techno nonsense!" If nothing else, they'll assume you're crazy and steer well clear

Somebody should develop a simple website - something like CharityCollectorDueDilligenceCheck.com - with questions that you can require them to complete before you will look at their form:
What is the charity number?
How long have they been working for the charity?
How much do they personally give to the charity each month?
What first attracted them to the charity and its causes?
Can you guarantee that any money I give/agree to give today will be handed straight to the charity, without any commission?
If no, and they are expecting to take commission, why wouldn't I be better giving directly to the charity, so that they get all of it directly?
Note: I will not accept 'we take our commission out of the gift aid, so all of your giving goes straight to the charity' - as that gift aid is also my taxes that I can choose to reallocate to the charity on top of my giving, so that they get the maximum amount.

If they won't fill in your form, how could they possibly expect you to fill in theirs? Get THEM having to keep saying No (or just go away, preferably).

It still worked though didnt it?

You paid her.

Don't even look at them. If they speak, hold up a hand and keep going. Not difficult. They prey on politeness.

Churglers!!
I'm going to use that from now on

Well her tactic worked as you bought something! Just keep walking next time!

I had one the other day just as I was getting home from the school run, trying to get my 5 year old and toddler in the house, lugging the pram up 3 steps to get into the house containing a red faced angry screaming baby who needed feeding. He saw all of this and still decided now might be a good time to give me his whole charity spiel. When I said now is not a good time sorry he said ‘oh don’t you care about children then?!’ Um think I need to look after my actual children instead of standing here listening to you. It makes me so mad that they often try to make you feel guilty for not donating to them when they probably don’t even care about the charity themselves.

I do agree, though, that - like badly behaved children who are routinely ignored by their parents - they see any attention as positive.

They know you aren't going to welcome them, or leave them with a warm glow in your heart because of how much they're brightened up their day, so they probably see that they've got nothing to lose: annoy you and get nothing or annoy you until you buy a magazine off them, to get rid of them. Like wasps at a picnic once they smell your delicious sweet lemonade.

The best is not slowing down at all.
" No thanks".

And just keep on walking.

It worked yes because I felt intimidated.

It should be illegal to bully/harass somebody into giving you money. There are people more vulnerable than me that may well have paid the £25 and not just the £5 for the magazine. Its wrong.

If i get sucked in then I apologise and say "so sorry for wasting your time but that I already give £x to that charity every month and I really can't afford to increase it' they seem to find it hard to argue through that.

Also I'm sure the rules changed.

I thought they weren't allowed to approach people any more, or chase them down the road?

Many years ago, as a student I got a holiday job working in a call centre doing charity fundraising. I only lasted a few weeks. We were calling on behalf of various national charities, we weren't paid commission but if we didn't hit our targets in terms of number of people called and number of donations received we'd be let go.

We had a very rigid script that we had to stick to and a key part of that was making sure we asked for donations three times every call - first a monthly donation, then a lower or less frequent regular donation and then a one-off donation. We were told in training that asking 3 times has been shown to get the most donations.

I'm sure that's true, I'm also sure it pisses a lot of people off and intimidates others and I'm not sure how much good it does the charities' reputations in the long term. That said this was more than 15 years ago and the fundraising agencies are obviously still taking the same approach.

Ooooof chuggers make my blood boil. When I was a student, a much larger male chugger walked alongside me for a bit after I said no thanks, I don't have time, I'm going for the bus - then waved his hand in front of my face going "Hellooooooooo!". I nearly had a panic attack right there.

You lot are aware that these are actual human beings you are talking about? They wouldn’t be doing it for the fun of it, they just have bills to pay and mouths to feed like the rest of us. Some of you sound really self righteous and not very nice!