To think that men SHOULD be encouraged to be on MumsNet

[BrokenLawnmower]

Obligatory: "man here" for anyone who would like to stop reading now 😆

I've been a member of MN (and other parenting forums where the members are, for whatever reason, mostly female) for about 15 years and I like to think that my exposure and involvement in these communities has given me valuable insight into women's issues.

If only in small ways, I truly believe it has made me a different (better?) man. I've had so many of my assumptions challenged and over time I have grown to accept that I am, without a doubt, part of the patriarchy that women are forced to cope with every day.

By and large, I also really like the people here.

Do the women of MN think that the men in their lives would also benefit from this experience?

YABU = They shouldn't be on MN
YANBU = They should be on MN

I don’t really care whether men think they learn anything or not by coming on here, what would make a difference would be men listening to and giving credit and respect to the women they know and encounter in RL. Those women have probably been saying all the stuff you read on here but men often don’t think it’s worth listening to

yes but it is not just men that piss off women here, it is other women too.You could apply what you just said towards women also.

The Op came on, stated he was a man and started a thread about what we think about men being on the website...We all proceed to discuss the premise of men on MN...Wtf? It speaks fir itself.

If he'd have come on and made a thread about odd socks we'd all be discussing odd socks. That's how it works.

This

Women aren't strange alien creatures. You could just try treating them like they are human?

I disagree, every interaction we have is a learning opportunity.

This.

I do confess though that I cannot stand ‘man here’.

You either have something helpful or interesting to say or you have not. I don’t need an announcement that heralds their arrival as if we should sit at their feet and listen.

YABU OP as I don't think men need encouragement to come here IMO. Some of men I know need encouragement to understand male/female relationships better and how to coexist in a more mutually positive way. A way that's perhaps less self satisfying. But you're not going to get that from MN necessarily.

I found MN about 20 years ago because having kids tends to consist of lots of info right up to the birth but then zilch. If MN was 'by mums for mums' and advertised as a female only space then I'd respect that and just lurk. But I've asked and received lots of great advice over the years and hopefully given some too. Over the years I've found it informative and entertaining.

Sadly we still live in times where women do the bulk of parenting, hence this is a female dominated site. But some of us love parenting and that never stops. Neither do the problems/questions!

Have you decided that for all of us?

Personally I think listening to anyone's thoughts and experiences can be a massive learning oportunity if you open your mind.

I agree. We centre the sock as it were
We're unaware that it's a male posting, unless they feel the need to tell us. In my experience of MN it immediately changes the focus. I come here as I generally assume its a female focused forum.
As others have said and also in my experience the whole flipping outside world is skewed on the male perspective side.

It's supposed to be for parents. The only reason it's not called parentsnet is it's not as catchy.

Your sex isn't an issue. The site was made for parents to support each other.

This.

Everytime women organise a woman’s space to discuss women’s issues like breastfeeding menopause etc, men turn up and start being bossy.

You aren’t welcome here according to the majority of replies to the poll on your post, and I don’t care if it’s made you a better man. Go read a self help book, or ask your mum how to behave.

Is this how your mum taught you to behave or were you just born nasty?

WTF? Women aren't some fucking experiment for you to learn about and be "exposed to".

I’ve been on here over a decade. Learnt a lot, contributed a bit.

I can be on a parenting site, and I’m not going to pay a huge about of attention to the minority telling me I’m not welcome. I’d never tell a woman she couldn’t be on a car site or a music site just because it was male dominated.

FloydPepper have you ever seen a woman post on a male dominated site with the central message that women should be encouraged to be on the site (and if you have were a lot of the responses creepy or sexualised)?

Yes I have, and yes to the creepy responses

Pleasant.

Fair enough though. The tone of the OP totally deserves that kind of response.

A woman didn’t write the OP

“Man here”, “nurse here” ,“solicitor here”.
Take these as a warning that you are about to read a load of bull.

Just what we all need, a man telling us how to do Mumsnet better.

Not sure that's right to be fair ...

So you’ve never had access to women in real life to listen to then?

If you think coming on here is like listening to womens’ private conversations then 1, it’s not, and 2, what kind of a man wants to listen in on womens’ private conversations?

you could have of course just read, without feeling the need to post and tell us what a great man you are because you listen to women. I sometimes read threads on ‘black mumsnetters’ to listen to the perspectives of black women that I might not normally be exposed to, I don’t feel the need to ‘what a wonderful white person I am for listening to you’ all over it.

The OP asked a question. I don't see where he was telling us to do anything? 🤷‍♀️

Not interersted in more opinions from men tbh. Especially with the usual disclaimer : man here.

I've had my fill of them