My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

AIBU?

You don’t need to be housebound if you’re off sick from work

194 replies

TeaAndBrie · 06/10/2022 12:49

I’ve been off work for 3 days with a bad cold (not covid). I’m used to being on the go and spend more time out of the house than in. The last two days have been spent in bed, today I’m feeling a little brighter but get tired and dizzy quickly so not well enough to go back to work. My concentration level is terrible and at work I need to make important decisions and have staff depending on me.
it’s a beautiful sunny day outside and I was considering going out for a walk and maybe get a coffee from a kiosk (not sit in Costa or anything). My DH was mortified and said if I’m ill I shouldn’t leave the house and if i can then I’m well enough to go to work.
interested to know what people think?

OP posts:
Report

Am I being unreasonable?

829 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
51%
You are NOT being unreasonable
49%
DameHelena · 06/10/2022 15:49

*Black

Report
Toddlerteaplease · 06/10/2022 15:50

Badger1970 · 06/10/2022 12:51

If you can go for a walk and sit in a coffee shop, you're well enough to be at work.

Not necessarily, I'm and nurse And have MS. When it flares up. I can't manage a 12 hour shift on my feet. But can get the bus or drive to a coffee shop. It's what keeps me sane when off.

Report
frigginfroid · 06/10/2022 15:51

I'm off work with longcovid at the moment. Yesterday, the GP made a point of telling me not to stay inside but to do short walks and 'nice things' for myself to help with any potential anxiety associated with longcovid. It aids wellbeing.

Social prescribing is a thing these days. Of course you should be able to sit in a cafe and relax.

I'm a social worker and there's just no way I could manage a stressful job like this at the moment with the necessary focus, memory and attention required for safeguarding vulnerable people 8 hours plus a day. I'd be utterly wiped out after the first 30 minutes.

Report
TeaAndBrie · 06/10/2022 15:51

DameHelena · 06/10/2022 15:48

These threads always bring out the competitive martyrs and the Monty Python Blakc Knight-alikes ('It's just a flesh wound!'). Get off your high horses, the lot of you, and give your heads a wobble.

OP, I hope you're going or have gone out. Fresh air and gentle exercise are good for you. And I totally agree with the get-off-the-sofa test; I once had a colleague whose mantra for herself and others was 'When you think you feel completely better, have another day off.'

That made me laugh (which brought on a coughing fit but it was worth it) 😂
’we’ll call it a draw’

OP posts:
Report
Judystilldreamsofhorses · 06/10/2022 15:52

I'm a lecturer. I've been off work sick in years past with really nasty colds, and gone for a walk in the park towards the end of the sick days. Totally different to standing in front of a group of students and delivering lessons. By that point I would also have logged on and done some marking/planning which I could do from the couch, and again is a different ballgame to what can feel like performing on a stage. I hope you have gone for your walk, OP.

Report
starfishmummy · 06/10/2022 15:53

I was considering a walk as more of a test to see how much I can cope with as it’s easy to feel better at home on the sofa.

With me there comes a point when going out for a gentle stroll helps me to get back to normal. But sometimes I've done it too soon and got about 20 yards before having to go home again - in that case I know I need to recover a bit more. Round the block and I knew I would cope back at work.

Report
steff13 · 06/10/2022 15:53

I probably wouldn't go out. I don't know why your husband would be embarrassed by it, though.

Report
DameHelena · 06/10/2022 15:56

TeaAndBrie · 06/10/2022 15:51

That made me laugh (which brought on a coughing fit but it was worth it) 😂
’we’ll call it a draw’

Sorry about the coughing fit Grin

Report
ddl1 · 06/10/2022 15:57

Depends what the job is. If it's something where poor concentration could have bad consequences, or where you would be constantly breathing your germs into vulnerable people's faces, YANBU. (E.g. most NHS jobs, on both counts.) Otherwise, maybe YABU.

Report
ChazsBrilliantAttitude · 06/10/2022 16:06

For all of those suggesting you shouldn’t go out when off sick etc. some of DH’s friends are bus drivers if one of them broke their fingers, an arm or a leg would they have to stay in the house until the fracture healed? You can’t drive a double decker bus with a broken arm but I think you can buy a coffee.

Report
BitOutOfPractice · 06/10/2022 16:06

My mom used to say "if you're well enough to play out, you're well enough to go to school" 😃

I think it depends on the job to be honest. If it's very physical / full on / stressful that's different from a desk job like mine.

Report
Xenia · 06/10/2022 16:15

There are two different issues - should someone really be in work if they manage a walk and separately even if not if you are seen out you might get scaked so may be best to stay in. Some employers lawfully employ investigators to film supposed sick people or accident victims merrily skipping around to catch out liars and skivers.

Report
Mybestyear · 06/10/2022 16:17

Badger1970 · 06/10/2022 12:51

If you can go for a walk and sit in a coffee shop, you're well enough to be at work.

Nonsense!! I was off for weeks with a broken are as health and safety / occ health wouldn't let me return but I was fine to get out and about.

Report
Soproudoflionesses · 06/10/2022 16:18

astrowars · 06/10/2022 12:54

There a huge difference between a gentle walk and picking up a take away coffee than working all day. There's absolutely nothing wrong with doing that as part of your recovery, the fresh air will definitely help.
Being not fit for work does not mean being under house arrest.

I agree with this.

Report
CaptainMyCaptain · 06/10/2022 16:32

Badger1970 · 06/10/2022 12:51

If you can go for a walk and sit in a coffee shop, you're well enough to be at work.

Rubbish. It's not remotely like, for example, being with a class of 30 kids all day, standing on your feet in a shop, working on a hospital ward. Not the same at all.

Report
TeaAndBrie · 06/10/2022 16:36

BitOutOfPractice · 06/10/2022 16:06

My mom used to say "if you're well enough to play out, you're well enough to go to school" 😃

I think it depends on the job to be honest. If it's very physical / full on / stressful that's different from a desk job like mine.

I grew up with the same rule, as did my daughter. However, it is something to be used with children to sound out how ill they actually are!
Surely this doesn’t apply to responsible grown ups

OP posts:
Report
Mommabear20 · 06/10/2022 16:45

Definitely depends on what you're off for, but for a cold, if you can get out of the house and go for a walk, then you're more than capable of going to work, even if you're less productive than usual.

Report
KateLumley · 06/10/2022 16:47

Your DH being embarrassed seems a weird reaction, is he worried you might be seen by someone?

Report
BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 06/10/2022 16:47

Mommabear20 · 06/10/2022 16:45

Definitely depends on what you're off for, but for a cold, if you can get out of the house and go for a walk, then you're more than capable of going to work, even if you're less productive than usual.

Some businesses would rather get cover in for a sick person than have someone in who was only on half power.

Waiting tables, cleaning etc - it's more hassle to have a member of staff on only do half their usual amount because they are ill, than it is to just ring in another fit and we'll person to cover.

Report
MsFogi · 06/10/2022 16:55

Badger1970 · 06/10/2022 12:51

If you can go for a walk and sit in a coffee shop, you're well enough to be at work.

This!

Report
ChazsBrilliantAttitude · 06/10/2022 17:02

MsFogi · 06/10/2022 16:55

This!

So, using my example above a bus driver with a broken arm should go to work because he or she is capable of walking to a cafe?

Report
TeaAndBrie · 06/10/2022 17:30

KateLumley · 06/10/2022 16:47

Your DH being embarrassed seems a weird reaction, is he worried you might be seen by someone?

A few people have said this but I can’t see where I said he was embarrassed? My brain is mush atm so it may have been a typo as he wasn’t embarrassed.
I did say he was mortified, which I meant to mean that he was surprised and indignant that I should stay in

OP posts:
Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

FrankTheThunderbird · 06/10/2022 17:33

TeaAndBrie · 06/10/2022 17:30

A few people have said this but I can’t see where I said he was embarrassed? My brain is mush atm so it may have been a typo as he wasn’t embarrassed.
I did say he was mortified, which I meant to mean that he was surprised and indignant that I should stay in

Mortified means embarrassed though doesn't it? It's certainly how I was taught to use it.

Report
steff13 · 06/10/2022 19:10

TeaAndBrie · 06/10/2022 17:30

A few people have said this but I can’t see where I said he was embarrassed? My brain is mush atm so it may have been a typo as he wasn’t embarrassed.
I did say he was mortified, which I meant to mean that he was surprised and indignant that I should stay in

Mortified means extremely embarrassed.

Report
CapMarvel · 06/10/2022 19:13

Badger1970 · 06/10/2022 12:51

If you can go for a walk and sit in a coffee shop, you're well enough to be at work.

Clearly nonsense.

Of course it's fine to go out for a walk, if anything getting out for some air and to clear your head will help get people back to their desks quicker.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.