To think that people should consider paying for MH services?

[DoodlePug]

First of all, of course I think it is wrong that you can not access services on the NHS.

Secondly, yes I know there is a cost of living crisis and people have even less spare money than they used to.

However, we are where we are and I feel some people don't prioritise their mental health as much as their physical health. I know plenty of people who pay for private physio which they should be able to access on the NHS, and for hip/knee operations because the list is too long yet the same people are waiting months/years for assessment and treatment for MH conditions which invariably get worse.

Obviously if you can't pay you can't pay, but is 2 weeks in the sun really better for your health than 20 counselling sessions which could well help to alleviate your anxiety/depression?

If someone is choosing between treatment for their elbow and their anxiety why does the elbow always win?

Is it just a societal thing? Do we not value our MH as much as our physical health? Or is there still a stigma and you feel good for seeing a physio but bad for seeing a counsellor?

Genuinely perplexed why people who could afford it and have shown an inclination to spend on private physical care won't do the same when it's mental care. Would love to hear your thoughts.

And if anyone is looking for a counsellor the bacp register is a good place to start.

Therapy / Counselling should always be done in-conjunction with other things; social support networks being built up, exercise, nutrition, yoga, creative therapies etc. as well - a lot of these are not funded privately.

I estimate I’ve spent about £4K on therapy. It’s not cheap…worth every penny if you can afford it though.

Mental health services has always been seen seen as the cinderella services of the NHS it needs more and investment in specialist area ,s not less.

Don't be so stupid.

@DismantledKing

If I wanted power I would have remained working in services, except I didn’t I left. I agree though that there’s a lot of bad eggs working in the services. The good ones leave. Always. They get disillusioned with the lack of funds, the tick boxing and the endless campaigns that do nothing more than keep stigma fully intact within society. MH charities for a start NEED stigma, they sure as hell wouldn’t survive without it. A lot of people working in MH are also just in it to heal themselves and that also didn’t sit right with me.

One more point to consider, is that there isn't a set time frame for mental health services - you can go in thinking you need 12 sessions of EMDR (or whatever) and then realise you actually need to specialist trauma therapy, TF-CBT, Psychodynamic etc., these therapies can take years (talking from experience here).

A lot of people go to a mental health service thinking X is the problem and then they find out about Y and Z. I went in thinking I would be discharged within six months. This was 5+ years ago now.

If you break your elbow, you know there's a timeframe to that treatment say.

YABU. Two weeks in the sun isn’t going to cure my bipolar or EUPD. I’ve been fortunate enough to be well supported by the community mental health team and have been backwards and forwards to them for the last 6 years and am likely to end up back under them at some point. There’s no way I could afford the number of psychiatric assessments I’ve had let alone the specialist DBT and EDMR therapies I’ve had.

Well, it now seems unlikely that @DoodlePug is a troll, she's just a counsellor. Who wants people to pay for counselling. OMFG.

So years ago I had two friends who didnt want to get real jobs so they trained as counsellors; paid for it themselves. They constantly spoke about how much they despised their clients and how they fleeced them, they also had regular work from schools and NHS clinics - one called the young people she counselled "snivellers". They both took cash payments and then put a few paid sessions on their books to support their working tax credit claims etc.

So I think anyone who pays for private counselling also risks coming across people like these two, and, of course, those like @DoodlePug , probably exactly the same risk as NHS but seeing as @DoodlePug raised it, no, people shouldn't pay to see counsellors like you, they need decent NHS services.

I'm an NHS therapist. Lots of people do pay but a lot of people also have no money. It's not uncommon for people to have accessed therapy privately whilst waiting or before accessing nhs services, it's really quite expensive though. The thing is with holidays often people aren't just considering their own needs, so they might have had a holiday with their kids or partner but it would be difficult for them to feel they can sacrifice that for something for themselves. Ideally services would have much shorter waiting lists so wouldn't need to make difficult choices.

@HangerLaneGyratorySystem

Well that’s the problem with counselling I guess. I mean anyone can call themselves a counsellor. I know someone who is doing a completely unregulated course and is planning on seeing clients very soon after a few weeks. Absolutely absurd, and dangerous!! Of course now she thinks she’s an expert in relationship dynamics from all of the “my ex is a narcissist type posts on Facebook” It is honestly ridiculous …. People don’t check their credentials out through no fault of their own as it’s not an easy system to navigate. There was a parliamentary debate about the need for tighter regulations but they’re not interested as they want people to have “choice”. Although ethically they just don’t give a shit.

The few good counsellors I know had absolutely years of extensive post grad training (and also years of therapy themselves). They are absolute professionals but do work in the NHS and in private practice. It must be grating for them to hear of shoddy, unregulated practice.

I’m on a low income, can’t really afford private healthcare. But I have chosen to pay for private counsellors, when I wouldn’t consider paying private for physical health problems. Only because the waiting lists on the NHS for mental health support are ridiculous and usually it can’t wait. If I’m suicidal, I need urgent care, not 12 months later. So I would say I prioritise my mental over physical health… I think it just depends on the severity of the concern and how urgently it needs to be dealt with.

There are actually a few questions here.
The first is why people don't pay attention to their mental health. There are quite a few answers to that. Mental health issues can creep on you and become your normality. Depression and anxiety especially. This question is related to why people self medicate or believe a break from the stress of their day to day lives will effect a change.

The second question is why there aren't enough therapists and psychiatrists to cut into the long waiting lists. Having easy access to mental health treatment would ease the stigma of mental illness and would also result in more people having better quality of life, less addiction, less domestic violence, fewer children affected by adult problems, less disruption in schools, probably less crime. It makes no sense to not invest in mental health services.

The issue of whether people should pay hasn't relation to these problems. Paying isn't going to make any difference to accessibility.

I had 20 sessions of EMDR to help with PTSD after the traumatic loss of two pregnancies. I could not have afforded that type/length of treatment privately. I am very grateful that I could access that treatment when friends who had also suffered baby loss and had PTSD couldn’t access similar treatment due to their postcode.

Our son has anxiety and we’re paying privately for support with this as we could afford it and we wanted him to access help quickly. Had we not been able to afford it, we’d have gone on a waiting list. There are probably a lot of people who pay for private treatment/support but they may not be as comfortable to talk about it compared to a wonky elbow.

I’ve had NHS physio and also paid for a chiropractor, should I have paid privately for the physio too?

I had 8 emergency sessions a couple of years ago through work - without it I would have died.

many people are not choosing between a holiday and paying for mental health - they can’t afford either

As lots of other posters have said: plenty of people do go private! My teenager has been suffering with some mental health problems and I felt her need was fairly urgent so I didn’t even enquire down the NHS route as I assumed it would take a very long time. I am paying for her to see a counsellor weekly until such time as she feels she no longer needs it. I’m certainly feeling the financial impact and have had to make cutbacks elsewhere, but recognise I’m lucky that it’s possible at all as I know that a lot of people can’t just free up £60 a week.

I’ve been paying for my autistic daughter’s MH care since she was 13 and suicidal, she’s now 20. CAHMS and the GP didn’t seem to give a crap, GP actually said ‘well what do you want me to do about it?’ in front of her. Grudging referred me to CAHMS when I asked and they told me it was a 2 year wait for her to talk to someone. So I found help for her as the NHS wouldn’t. We are lucky enough to have the spare money, if you don’t then I dread to think what happens.

YABU. Very. People already pay if they can afford it. Fewer will now, obviously. Many can't afford it.

I'm wondering why you care about this? Not canvassing, are you?

Spot on

That's because you don't understand the concept

I have consistently paid for my dd's mental health support - those who don't probably can't afford it

When I was going through a chronic low spell I couldn't get help for months but looked up counselling on the BACP website only to find most of the private therapists that might have been able to help had full lists. Rock and hard Place.

@clovacloud I agree and experienced similar. Depressed and anxious teenager cutting and overdosing. GP sat opposite dd who had asked for help and said "oh CAMHS are useless, they won't do anything and you'll wait for ages."

I asked for a private referral. "Oh we don't do that, Google BACP and phone this charity and go on their waiting list.

Good job I had enough money to fund a a a consultant psychiatrist. DD had some counselling but was in too bad a place to benefit. Had propranolol and fluoxetine. It helped. Helped her to engage with counselling. She also had some day patient drama and art therapy. As she improved she articulated her true feelings and that something was innately wrong. She had ADHD. She needed to be medicated.

A CAMHS nurse, when I told her about the ADHD diagnosis (utter turning point) and there was a crisis between assessment and diagnosis, she said "well mum, she's too old to be diagnosed with that".

@DoodlePug I'm not telling you how much we spent. But how very dare assert people won't pay for MH care. For some it isn't a choice and my heart goes out to them.

OP it's also my experience that for the people who are close to me they are not prepared to pay privately for therapy for mental health issues. This is due to prioritising other spending that for me would be less of a priority - new cars, holidays, expensive days out etc. I find it odd too but we are all different.
The same people would not consider using private dentists either but as you say would pay for private physio.

What I find odd is that OP started this thread then went it didn't go her way just didn't bother to come back despite posting on other threads today.

Do very many people with mental health conditions needing medical help go off for two weeks in the sun?
an awful lot can’t find the energy to leave the house.