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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Should I send DS to nursery with a cough ?

30 replies

pinkpotty · 04/10/2022 08:06

My DS doesn't really get bad coughs. He usually gets fevers that knock him out and make him quite unwell, so I always keep him home when he's feeling like that.

He's got a nasty cough since yesterday and had a short fever the night before last. I kept him off yesterday.

He's completely happy and normal and no fever, just the fever the night before last ( for which I didn't give medicine, I just took some layers off him and it went down straight away ).

But the cough doesn't sound great. It's the type of cough that I hear all the time when I pick him up at nursery or when we go to softplay. All the kids seem to have it at the moment.

Sounds a bit wet, not dry.

If I send him in, will that make it worse ? I might be being OTT, but like I said, all the kids have this cough. So I think parents tend to send their kids in with it.

I just don't want him to run around and get sweaty and then go outside and then get more ill.

OTT or reasonable ?

He's two and a half.

OP posts:
chatterbug22 · 04/10/2022 08:13

If you can keep him home, I would. If only to be more fair on the staff too x

ChilliBandit · 04/10/2022 08:16

I would probably keep him at home for one more day but then send him in. My DC has had a cough for 2 weeks (it’s nearly gone), he’d never be at nursery if I kept him home for the duration of every cough.

pinkpotty · 04/10/2022 08:18

chatterbug22 · 04/10/2022 08:13

If you can keep him home, I would. If only to be more fair on the staff too x

None of the other parents seem to care. Why should I ?

OP posts:
TigerRag · 04/10/2022 08:23

pinkpotty · 04/10/2022 08:18

None of the other parents seem to care. Why should I ?

Until their child passes it on to someone with asthma or a similar health problem and for them, the cough is serious.

maryberryslayers · 04/10/2022 08:25

Going to nursery won't make him worse. The wet cough young children often have is usually post-nasal drip, they cough as opposed to clearing their throat as an adult would.
Of course people send kids in with coughs, most people can't take time off work every time dc have a cold, they'd lose their jobs.

pinkpotty · 04/10/2022 08:26

@TigerRag everyone does it though. My child also has problems. It's the risk you take if you send your child to nursery unfortunately. I would rather all parents keep their kids home when they're sick, but no one does.

OP posts:
misskatamari · 04/10/2022 08:27

If you can I’d probably keep him home for another day too. It doesn’t matter what other parents do, if you’re concerned that it might not be in his best interests to be in when he’s poorly, then who gives a fig if other kids are in with a cough. If you think he will be fine and manage the day, then by all means send him in, as unfortunately at that age kids just cycle lurgy like this, and coughs tend to linger, so you can’t keep them off for the duration.

pinkpotty · 04/10/2022 08:29

misskatamari · 04/10/2022 08:27

If you can I’d probably keep him home for another day too. It doesn’t matter what other parents do, if you’re concerned that it might not be in his best interests to be in when he’s poorly, then who gives a fig if other kids are in with a cough. If you think he will be fine and manage the day, then by all means send him in, as unfortunately at that age kids just cycle lurgy like this, and coughs tend to linger, so you can’t keep them off for the duration.

Yeah the only reason I would keep him off is for him, not for anyone else's benefit.

The cough is not great sounding, but strangely, it's not there in the night ! Thankfully. I think another day might be the right way to go.

OP posts:
maryberryslayers · 04/10/2022 08:31

@TigerRag surely someone who would become this poorly from a common cough/cold wouldn't be in a nursery setting?

ForTheLoveOfSleep · 04/10/2022 08:31

pinkpotty · 04/10/2022 08:26

@TigerRag everyone does it though. My child also has problems. It's the risk you take if you send your child to nursery unfortunately. I would rather all parents keep their kids home when they're sick, but no one does.

So why are you asking then? You've clearly made up your mind 🙄

pinkpotty · 04/10/2022 08:32

@ForTheLoveOfSleep I was asking for the benefit of MY child, whether it's likely he will get more sick. If anyone has experience at that scenario, rather than worrying about staff and other kids.

OP posts:
TigerRag · 04/10/2022 08:32

maryberryslayers · 04/10/2022 08:31

@TigerRag surely someone who would become this poorly from a common cough/cold wouldn't be in a nursery setting?

I'm talking about the other people they come into contact with.

"everyone does it" doesn't make it ok.

pinkpotty · 04/10/2022 08:35

@TigerRag it's your own responsibility to avoid sick people if you don't want to get sick. I've been in that position and know how it feels. Life can't stop unfortunately. Everyone is responsible for themselves if they want to avoid illness.

OP posts:
Cativy · 04/10/2022 08:45

I'd sent him in! It's just a cough and like you say they all have these coughs at nursery. He probably got it from another kid at nursery to begin with. You can't take time off work every time your child at nursery has a sniffle or cough as you'd never be at work. It's part of life and getting these coughs etc is building their immune system up.

ChilliBandit · 04/10/2022 12:40

You can’t keep children in a sterile vacuum. I wouldn’t send my child to nursery if they had something like chicken pox or measles but a bit of a runny nose/ residual cough and otherwise well, yes I would. If you kept your child off for every minor ailment you’d might as well not work.

Would be interesting to know whether children who are exposed to mild viruses at nursery level have stronger immune systems when they start school.

ParadiseLaundry · 04/10/2022 12:53

I would send mine in in these circumstances.

I'd keep them off with a fever (as you did) but would send them in with a cough or runny nose if they were otherwise well in the self

ParadiseLaundry · 04/10/2022 12:55

Sorry, meant to also say that if they were otherwise ok I wouldn't expect a day at nursery to make them more poorly.

PinkButtercups · 04/10/2022 12:58

So you've asked a question you've already made your mind up about the answer so what's your point?

Spudina · 04/10/2022 12:59

I would COVID test him and potentially send if negative. Does he seem well enough to be away from you all day? If he feels poorly he probably just wants you right?
If everyone sends their kids in without a COVID test, the staff will all end up being off.

Tillsforthrills · 04/10/2022 13:02

pinkpotty · 04/10/2022 08:32

@ForTheLoveOfSleep I was asking for the benefit of MY child, whether it's likely he will get more sick. If anyone has experience at that scenario, rather than worrying about staff and other kids.

Wow.

Tiani4 · 04/10/2022 17:55

Don't know if you sent him in today or not- he had a fever Sunday night , you kept him off yesterday and are thinking of sending him back in today but he has a new wet cough that doesn't sound great - so should you send him info nursery or keep off at home for a second day?

I'd have wanted to keep him home

Usually with a fever, you keep them off 48 hours returned to normal. At least that was nursery and school advice before covid pandemic

With a new cough and recent fever i would have wanted him off at home today to see how he went and make sure he has a good rest . Coughs after rotten for toddlers & I would be worried he'd go downhill whilst at nursery (& pass it on to others).

Sometimes that extra day tucked up in a blanket on sofa is a saving in the long run as they can get better so much quicker.

But then you know your own son. Two of my DCs would/could go downhill quickly and the other one would shake any illness off quickly...

Moonopoly · 04/10/2022 18:02

@Spudina how are you meant to covid test when there is no testing available?

ChilliBandit · 04/10/2022 18:30

Tillsforthrills · 04/10/2022 13:02

Wow.

Wow indeed…

pinkpotty · 04/10/2022 18:34

Tiani4 · 04/10/2022 17:55

Don't know if you sent him in today or not- he had a fever Sunday night , you kept him off yesterday and are thinking of sending him back in today but he has a new wet cough that doesn't sound great - so should you send him info nursery or keep off at home for a second day?

I'd have wanted to keep him home

Usually with a fever, you keep them off 48 hours returned to normal. At least that was nursery and school advice before covid pandemic

With a new cough and recent fever i would have wanted him off at home today to see how he went and make sure he has a good rest . Coughs after rotten for toddlers & I would be worried he'd go downhill whilst at nursery (& pass it on to others).

Sometimes that extra day tucked up in a blanket on sofa is a saving in the long run as they can get better so much quicker.

But then you know your own son. Two of my DCs would/could go downhill quickly and the other one would shake any illness off quickly...

Thanks for responding to my question. Very useful insight!

OP posts:
Ineedsleepandcoffee · 04/10/2022 18:45

maryberryslayers · 04/10/2022 08:31

@TigerRag surely someone who would become this poorly from a common cough/cold wouldn't be in a nursery setting?

Of course there are children with asthma and other medical conditions at nursery. You have to weigh up the risks with the benefits.

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