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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think when people say 'Should of' instead of 'Should HAVE' - it makes them look incredibly thick

204 replies

Vajizzle · 03/10/2022 11:08

Honestly I do not understand how people can continue making this mistake

I know people who are very clever and have professional jobs, that continue to do this

It makes me fkin scream inside

OP posts:
SnowyPetals · 03/10/2022 13:35

I notice it, wouldn't employ someone on my comms team who habitually did it, but otherwise I carry on with my day.

LizzieW1969 · 03/10/2022 13:36

WhenDovesFly · 03/10/2022 12:04

It irks me, but I don't think "it makes people look incredibly thick". Not everyone has access to the same education, so be grateful for what you have had yourself.

Incidentally, people don't say Should Of, they usually say Should've, which is short for Should Have. If you're going to be critical about what people SAY, then at least get it right and say that it (in your opinion) makes them SOUND thick, not LOOK thick.

Yes, this is it. It’s what’s known as a ‘contraction’, which we do a lot of in English. It’s the same as ‘don’t’ for ‘do not’.

It does sound like ‘should of’, but it really isn’t that. It’s a verb whereas ‘of’ is a preposition.

I wouldn’t say that it makes a poster sound stupid, but it does nevertheless grate on me, I have to admit. But I wouldn’t jump into a thread to correct a poster, that’s just rude. And it often derails very interesting threads.

PearlLennox · 03/10/2022 13:36

I feel this way about “alot”. I don’t understand. How can anyone possibly think that alot is a word!!

CulturePigeon · 03/10/2022 13:37

It makes me think that perhaps they don't read very much. I think if you read books or newspapers (online or in print) you'll soon get the message that 'would of' isn't a thing. But I guess nowadays that's true of many people - perhaps they read texts etc, and see their own usages reinforced, but don't bother with longer, perhaps more grammatically-correct, reading matter.

When I was a teacher i used to go into battle against 'would of'!! It's a hard one to crack, because the correct version (would've) sounds the same to most people. I confess I say it myself as a joke - it's a very teenage-sounding usage - because it used to bug me.

No, it doesn't bother me but I do wonder how some people got where they are not knowing the correct form. As OP says, some professionals make this mistake.

Totalityloss · 03/10/2022 13:39

AlwaysLatte · 03/10/2022 13:20

You should of put this in the Pedants section.

Yeah OP, it’s not THAT difficult to have got that right.

Just makes you look a bit thick to not be able to correctly use the site.

Grin
Shortjanet · 03/10/2022 13:40

I can see that 've sounds like of which explains how it happens. What I don't get is why it only happens when preceded by could, should or would. In speech I'd be far more likely to say "I've got a new bike" than "I have got a new bike", yet I've never seen "I of" used in a similar way.

Ulrikakakaka · 03/10/2022 13:40

Oh god, the wolves are circling and turned it in to something else and a personal attack

I bet some of you are the same people who have 'be kind' plastered all over your facebook

IcedPurple · 03/10/2022 13:41

I'm not a grammar snob but 'could of' makes my toes curl and puts me off reading anything else the writer has to say.

BuzzingFridge · 03/10/2022 13:44

Sorry to be unpopular but yes it makes me cringe for people who write 'Could of' in a work place environment so no YANBU

The only unreasonable thing I see is the way people are launching personal attacks

CulturePigeon · 03/10/2022 13:58

Ulrikakakaka · Today 13:40
Oh god, the wolves are circling and turned it in to something else and a personal attack
I bet some of you are the same people who have 'be kind' plastered all over your facebook

Yes - agree!

Is it as worse sin to be irritated by a grammatical error, or to be a spiteful keyboard bully?

Willing to bet lots of these people also have their irrational pet hates - but that's different, no doubt.

poweredbysteam · 03/10/2022 14:00

Ulrikakakaka · 03/10/2022 13:40

Oh god, the wolves are circling and turned it in to something else and a personal attack

I bet some of you are the same people who have 'be kind' plastered all over your facebook

It was OP who called people thick.

rachelvbwho · 03/10/2022 14:03

Anyone who is so pedantic about language and grammar is a snob and has too much time on their hands IMO.

Language is there for us to communicate.... If you understand what the person is saying/writing then the communication has been successful and there is no need to comment further. Doing so belittles the individual and is completely unnecessary.

Not to mention the impact that commenting has on people with additional learning needs, disabilities and speech issues.

OoooohMatron · 03/10/2022 14:04

No because saying Should've, which is grammatically correct sounds like should of when spoken out loud doesn't it? Either way it's weird to get so annoyed with how other people speak.

PAFMO · 03/10/2022 14:04

Vajizzle · 03/10/2022 13:32

@PAFMO No unspoken rule.

Although repeating yourself can become a little tedious for those you are corresponding with.

My post was addressed to the poster who was supporting your POV. Not you. Unless, of course....

Ulrikakakaka · 03/10/2022 14:06

This reply has been deleted

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sóh₂wl̥ · 03/10/2022 14:06

It makes me think that perhaps they don't read very much. I think if you read books or newspapers (online or in print) you'll soon get the message that 'would of' isn't a thing.

Since I got passed initial reading problems - I've always read a lot. My teachers told my parents that spelling and grammar improve as a result. It didn't happen - in early 20s at University I was finally diagnosed with dyslexia.

I don't know if it is the dyslexia, or other conditions I have, but I've always worked best with explicit teaching.

I do think this was one reason grammar teaching wasn't done - as people who just pick up spelling and rules without much thought or practise assumed everyone was like them and it would just happen. Seen similar with our kids and spelling - never correct then surprise they never picked up it was wrong till we stepped in at home with comprehensive spelling program.

I think what's actually happened is entire generation - even well educated people like DH and I - post graduate qualifications - have educational gaps filled in ad hoc making it even harder to pass on correct grammar to next generation.

shipwreckedonhighseas · 03/10/2022 14:10

It says something about their education. I'm not stupid or snobbish enough to think it says anything about their intelligence.

Original poster
Vajizzle · 03/10/2022 14:10

@PAFMO

The sky is blue.

OP posts:
Snoopsnoggysnog · 03/10/2022 14:11

It makes me cringe.

I also agree that people who read even a tiny amount should be aware that that “would of” isn’t correct. Unless they just choose to ignore it and treat it like an accepted abbreviation.

poweredbysteam · 03/10/2022 14:15

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Are you OP?

I haven't attacked anyone.

Minimalme · 03/10/2022 14:16

It doesn't bother me at all. Our language is ever-changing. In fact, the only consistent thing about it is change.

Can you explain why it bothers you so much op?

GreenManalishi · 03/10/2022 14:20

There are lots of reasons people veer from "correct" grammar, if you don't have any of them to deal with then try and let it slide, rather than letting it make you fkin scream inside.

We don't all have the same experience of education, and there are far worse things to grind your teeth over.

LeFeu · 03/10/2022 14:21

Bit of an unnecessary reaction OP! Although my current grammatical pet peeve is people using “bare” instead of “bear” (such as “I can’t bare it”) which is really beginning to grate and also seems to making its way into generally accepted usage….

Hoppinggreen · 03/10/2022 14:23

Saying it is fine
Writing it is awful and does make people look like they don’t actually know that it should be HAVE rather than OF

Hoppinggreen · 03/10/2022 14:23

LeFeu · 03/10/2022 14:21

Bit of an unnecessary reaction OP! Although my current grammatical pet peeve is people using “bare” instead of “bear” (such as “I can’t bare it”) which is really beginning to grate and also seems to making its way into generally accepted usage….

Bare with me makes me giggle as it suggests some sort of communal nudity