To leave their dog at home?

[Rubywoo97]

DP and I have bought and renovated our first house-a gorgeous period property- it's finally finished and parents are visiting today for lunch. We have spent a great deal of time and money making it perfect and like it to be immaculate- we are childfree and have no pets. My parents have a large dog who we love to bits (think German Shepherd size) but he is extremely excitable and my parents never bothered to train him from when he was a puppy. This has resulted in jumping up, excessive scrounging at the table and barking if he's not fed from the table. He also barks loudly and climbs on furniture. I spoke to them on the phone yesterday and they announced they are bringing him. I said that this won't be possible but that we were looking forward to seeing them all. My dad got defensive and they basically persuaded me into letting them bring him saying they can't leave him alone for more than a few hours. I'm a little annoyed that they just assumed they could bring him and pushing for it when I said no. AIBU?

Yeah, what are you going to do about seeing them?

It would be much less stressful for everyone if they take him for a long walk to tire him out and leave him with a dog sitter.

Going forward maybe better to see them at their home? Dogs are lovely creatures ,but its your home and you are entitled to say who comes and goes! Perhaps today make it coffee and sandwiches and take doggy for a walk (If not raining) Otherwise Lunch out at a pub mid way in future .Doggy stays at home for an hour or two (perfectly fine)

If the dog doesn't come into the house then it doesn't matter if it gets muddy paws.

I wouldn't have a dog in my house either, you have every right to a dog-free home. If they can't cope with leaving the dog theyn meet up with them at a country pub instead.

There are consequences to choosing to have a large chaotic untrained pet. It's not your job to pretend that there isn't a problem.

I don't understand when people say dogs shouldn't be left alone for more than a few hours.. what do people with dog do when they go to work.
Mine is left for full days whilst I work

Dog walkers.
Daycare.
Dog comes to work with them.
Shift work so dogs aren't left for long.
They work from home.
Family help them out.

My dog comes to work with me - if that's not possible, my FIL looks after him during the day, or my mum will borrow him and take him out on a long walk.

Mine couldn't be left longer than an hour or two, let alone all day.

@mountainsunsets why can't he be left, genuine question, not being an arse

He has separation anxiety.

Can you go and get a stair gate and put it up to keep the dog in the kitchen?

@mountainsunsets 😔

Good idea

@1982mommaof4 You should be ashamed of yourself.

Totally entitled of them. We never take our dog anywhere unless she's invited.

No you are not BU. They sound v anti-social and lazy to have such an untrained dog (not blaming the dog!) Do they expect everywhere they go to put up with their dog's rude behaviour?

That said, I have a dog and a lovely home so the two are not mutually exclusive. I have some rooms that are off limits to the dog. To address your immediate problem, could you close off some rooms and contain the dog to the kitchen for eg.?

@1982mommaof4 he's an extreme case, bless him.

He's almost five and we can now leave him a couple of hours, but anything beyond that wouldn't be fair on him or the neighbours and my work doesn't always allow for me to pop back and get him so I can't just leave him home.

We're very lucky to have my in-laws, put it that way they can't walk him but I take him before he goes there and he mostly just follows FIL around and sleeps lol. He's a really good house dog as long as he has company and they love having him too.

How far away do they live? It’s good practice not to leave your dog alone for more than 4 hours or so. I have a dog and wouldn’t expect to take him to other peoples houses without checking BUT I can’t/won’t leave him more than 4hrs so I use a dog sitter. I have to book her weeks in advance so no last minute all day dog-free outings are possible. I always take dog with me to family / boyfriends house so if the rules changed about whether he could come along at the last minute I’d be a bit peeved and not be able to do a long visit as wouldn’t have a dog sitter sorted.

Why??

Ah I bet they love having the companionship without any of the responsibilities! ☺️

Pretty much!

The dog has his own bed there, a cupboard rammed full of treats and his own spot on the sofa

Sounds like my in laws with my 3 🤣

They love Grandma's.

Your poor dog.

He must be very bored and lonely all day.

@CaptaNoctem not at all, she has lots of toys to keep her entertained. Plays with my children all morning after her walk. She is a very happy dog

I adore my dog but I wouldn’t force her on anyone. She’s young and still bouncy. I would have taken for a long walk and tired her out then visited… depending on how far away you are?

Haha, it's such a nice relationship. I say to my dog "Are we going granddads?!" and he gets SO excited. He definitely knows and when we turn into my in-laws road he stands up and starts barking, lol.

YANBU especially as the dog sounds like a menace but they probably love their dog as much as you love your immaculate house, so you might have meet them at alternative venues in the future