Dd threw her cup at me

[Dogscratchingaway]

Dd has just turned 4, she’s been having some troubles with being ill recently, constipation etc and isn’t always herself when having tummy aches etc. She’s become angrier, for example, if she can’t do something, she gets frustrated really easily, she’s always been hitting if she gets cross, she never even did that when she was younger.
This morning, she had a paper cup and filled it with water. I hadn’t noticed and just saw a cup on the side, so poured the water out, she got upset, then threw the cup at me, it still had bits of water in it and it all went all over me. I was so shocked and so angry.
Is this normal behaviour? What would you do about this?

I'd be upset with her behaviour I agree with OP, I would give her time out.
I think this is why a lot of teenagers end up not listening to their parents because today's parenting is made of making excuses for their children's behaviour.
I would take her to the drs too to check for any health issues. X

I'd push for investigation of her pain.

It might sound out of the blue, but is she very flexible/bendy? Does she also complain that her legs hurt or is reluctant to walk or sit up/still? When she's walking, if you look at her from behind, do her ankles roll in at all? The reason I'm asking is that there are connective tissue disease that are very tiring, cause pain and are also commonly associated with constipation.

There's also the possibility of food intolerances or autoimmune issues triggered by food. And they often present with connective tissue diseases (the joys of genetics).
She could also have some rotten headaches that she can't articulate due to being 4, which can be related to any or all of the above.

Even if she doesn't have something like hEDS/Celiac/Lactose intolerance/whatever, if she's in pain a lot of the time, like anybody else, she's not going to be as amenable and accepting of things anymore than an adult would be when they're feeling awful 30% of the time, OK for 10 and generally rough for another 60%. She's not got the ability at her age to rationalise it, insist on help or rip the head off somebody at the local council over non collection of a green bin like a grown up could.

So I think make a GP appointment and request referral/further investigation.

She's just turned 4 and ill.

Say no more.

I'm not a big fan of parenting until they get to about 5 and a half and this is why!

@NeverDropYourMooncup What is the connective tissue disease called?

Sounds annoying and frustrating for you but she's 4, she's ill so feeling horrible and if she's just turned 4 probably had lots of changes going on with friends leaving to start school and she's left behind.
Kids have bad days too and is cross and frustrated and doesn't really know why. It so hard for you when you're in the middle of it to be reasonable and patient (I have definitely experienced that).
Lactulose is great for constipation so maybe start with that and some hugs. Verbalise her feelings and hope it gets better soon.

Mine? EDS. Also got psoriasis, psoriatic arthritis, celiac disease, MCAS and lactose intolerance. There's a cluster of shared symptoms that fall under the umbrella of 'feeling like shit from an early age'. But the thing that got me referred for investigation aged about 4/5 before the diagnoses started racking up and being refined over the years was constipation.

I think I would have been shocked by the cup throwing and I would have told my children that was unacceptable. But I think you were seeing it as an escalation after the hitting and kicking. Hitting and kicking are not okay and it’s that you need to address, you need a consistent conversation and consequence worked out for then.

you sound lovely and caring, you’ll be fine x

She’s 4. She’s adjusting and growing up. She’ll be experiencing different frustrations and not necessarily have the vocabulary to explain it in the right context.

you need to help her.

it’ll be a journey you’re in for many years ! So don’t think you can fix it in a week.

she sounds a bright and interesting person who will have lots to do and say and just needs the support (not saying you aren’t supportive, just your tack needs to change with her).

Take her for a scheduled poo daily. My son can be similarly short tempered when he's not realised he needs a poo. He's nearly 8.