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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Hotel gate - couple refused to pay their Wedding Bill shamed on Social Media

251 replies

StrawberryRed · 29/09/2022 22:57

A hotel in my area 'The Townhouse Durham' was ripped off by a couple. The couple are trying to avoid paying there bill by complaining.

www.google.com/amp/s/www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-11257679/amp/Battle-Buffet-Town-House-Durham-shames-newlyweds-bill-dispute.html

There is a huge backlash against the couple with people sharing their own problems they've had with the couple - they seem like a pair of scammers.

HOWEVER

I'm finding the Hotel a BU now, they seem to be really enjoying the drama and stirring the pot with updates on social media in a vendetta against the couple, it looks cheap IMO. If their is a complaint in place, perhaps libelous and a breach of confidentiality?

Thoughts?

OP posts:
AuntSalli · 02/10/2022 12:50

BoxcarMilly · 02/10/2022 12:33

I may have been asleep at the wheel here but the simplest course of action would be for the hotel to take them to the Small Claims Court.

However, I have read that the hotel didn't have an address for this couple, which, if true is absolutely ridiculous. If the hotel can't create a paper-trail for each customer and follow it through then maybe they deserve all they get?

They don’t have an address otherwise I’m sure that is what they would’ve done but as I said earlier up in the thread getting a CCJ against somebody who doesn’t care whether they have a CCJ or not does not recover your money.

BoxcarMilly · 02/10/2022 12:53

@AuntSalli "They don’t have an address otherwise I’m sure that is what they would’ve done but as I said earlier up in the thread getting a CCJ against somebody who doesn’t care whether they have a CCJ or not does not recover your money."

No, but it can sure as hell screw up their finances in the future....

AuntSalli · 02/10/2022 12:58

BoxcarMilly · 02/10/2022 12:53

@AuntSalli "They don’t have an address otherwise I’m sure that is what they would’ve done but as I said earlier up in the thread getting a CCJ against somebody who doesn’t care whether they have a CCJ or not does not recover your money."

No, but it can sure as hell screw up their finances in the future....

It’s immaterial because they don’t have an address or they didn’t have, hopefully they have now.

LilyPAnderson · 02/10/2022 13:06

Yes the whole Karen thing is from the USA. I noticed people seem a lot more angry with each other in the USA than Europe, particularly between men and women. I've seen some USA men with youtube channels who do nothing else but spend all day making videos where they're obviously extremely aggressive about about women, and they do it in a way to twist facts and be more abusive. Such as they make videos against feminists, but use a few examples of videos of women talking nonsense, to say that's any woman who speak against abusive men like them.
Or I've seen some USA women say they think men are disgusting if they haven't been circised. I thought, wow they say there's a lot of pressure of women to stay thin, but expecting men to have all had that done seems more of a pressure to me.
Maybe it's because they think they're the only country with free speech, so should shoot their mouth off at each other for the sake of it to annoy each other, and then the men and women blame each other, when they're really just being Americans. Although their disturbing culture influences some vulnerable people in other nations.

Mesoavocado · 02/10/2022 14:07

A story in daily mail. I won’t click on the link but can assume it’s all bullshit given the “paper” it’s reported by

LilyPAnderson · 02/10/2022 14:15

I just keep thinking, but why couldn't the hotel have made the mini burgers? How difficult would that have been?

Doingprettywellthanks · 02/10/2022 14:16

Hooray Henry
Don’t be a “Dick”
”Becky” a white woman unaware of her privilege
”Jack” of all trades master of none
“alright Jack” mentality ie if I’m ok, no problem
John - slang for toilet
Jonny - slang for condom

I could go on

AsAnyFuleKno · 02/10/2022 14:26

Doingprettywellthanks · 02/10/2022 14:16

Hooray Henry
Don’t be a “Dick”
”Becky” a white woman unaware of her privilege
”Jack” of all trades master of none
“alright Jack” mentality ie if I’m ok, no problem
John - slang for toilet
Jonny - slang for condom

I could go on

'Henry' needs a 'Hooray' added to be an insult. You don't call someone a 'Henry' as an insult.
'Jack of all trades' is a compliment, it's 'master of none' that is an insult, and again, you don't insult someone by calling them a 'Jack'.
'Becky' - not heard of this but would consider it as bad as 'Karen' - notably, it's the only female one you have listed and notably it's the only one that doesn't have a descriptor.
'Allright Jack' - someone is speaking to Jack, and it's the speaker who has the bad attitude, not 'Jack'.
John as slang for toilet is American - not used here and like 'Jonny' slang for condom, again, you don't insult someone by calling them a Jonny or, indeed, a condom.

Doingprettywellthanks · 02/10/2022 14:45

But it’s the associations!

MarkHemmings · 02/10/2022 15:09

You can't spell ...

Libre55 · 02/10/2022 17:36

If Netflix make this into a film Christopher Biggins will be in it.

Doingprettywellthanks · 02/10/2022 18:17

The funniest part of any film would be the scenes showing the obsessed mumsnet posters getting over excited about it all

Harmonypuss · 02/10/2022 19:51

I simply can't be bothered to read the whole thread but surely, in the case of a big event like a wedding, don't ask venues secure full payment BEFORE the event? If they didn't then I'm afraid they left themselves wide open to be defrauded. I'm not saying it's right, it's not, the bride and groom need to pay their bill but hopefully the venue will learn a valuable lesson from this.

J0y · 02/10/2022 20:58

mam0918 · 02/10/2022 10:17

eh?

The hotel was the victim, the people didnt complain until after the hotel tried to get their payment which they where scammed out of.

You cant eat a meal (or in this case 50) then just decide not to pay, thats not how the law works.

Eh?

I said "chancers aside" and then went on to address the third part of OP's point.
If you"d read her OP and my post properly you'd have understood. Well, maybe.

ThereIbledit · 02/10/2022 21:52

Reading the daily fail article (sorry I gave them the clicks) hotel staff went to their address to... confirm it was their address? So perhaps they had sent letters and they'd been returned claiming not at this address, (or just not replied to) and were seeking confirmation...?

mam0918 · 03/10/2022 10:19

BerriesOnTop · 02/10/2022 10:18

It started in America where they have the male equivilant 'a Kyle' just because you dont use that one doesnt mean its sexist

People upthread claiming its male equivalent is Ken or Kevin. Come on, there’s no real male equivalent but yeah, people are trying very hard to make it happen (it’s not happening).

I dont know where people got Ken of Kevin from its always been Kyle, its been a thing since I was a teen long before Karen became mainstream use... the bro/bro hoe/douchbag movement.

Famously the 'bro' iconic for monster energy, fox clothing, dirt bikes and his 'hoe' the famous 'karen' hair, 3/4 jeans, vests and flip flops.

www.google.com/search?q=Kyle+memes&tbm=isch&ved=2ahUKEwiCguTZ3MP6AhUNWhoKHSQ0Ap4Q2-cCegQIABAA&oq=Kyle+memes&gs_lcp=CgNpbWcQAzIECAAQQzIFCAAQgAQyBQgAEIAEMgUIABCABDIFCAAQgAQyBQgAEIAEMgUIABCABDIFCAAQgAQyBQgAEIAEMgUIABCABDoICAAQsQMQgwE6CAgAEIAEELEDOgcIABCxAxBDUOgFWL0VYI8YaABwAHgAgAH2AYgBxgiSAQUxLjUuMZgBAKABAaoBC2d3cy13aXotaW1nwAEB&sclient=img&ei=WKg6Y4J2jbRppOiI8Ak&bih=643&biw=1366&client=firefox-b-d

Maverickess · 03/10/2022 13:32

Reading the daily fail article (sorry I gave them the clicks) hotel staff went to their address to... confirm it was their address? So perhaps they had sent letters and they'd been returned claiming not at this address, (or just not replied to) and were seeking confirmation...?

This is what I thought when I read it too, people do give false details or just ignore communication, especially when they owe money.
As part of my job I chase payment owed (before the event) and the amount of people who ignore all communication, who's email address bounces back, who ignore letters, who's phones never get answered and then rock up the day before wanting it all sorted there and then and to go ahead and get very shitty when you can't oblige and say the event is cancelled, who think you owe them something because they might have chosen to spend money there, people want customer service but they don't want to have to put themselves out to tell you what they want, when and pay for it. They're busy and haven't got time.

Who get arsey when you chase for payment because 'cost of living' (like hospitality staff are somehow exempt from it, you know, one of the lower paid industries out there)

So I can imagine it's only worse if you're chasing actual money owed. The hotel were trying to help people out, and keep cash flow going for themselves in difficult times and to do that sometimes you need to bend a little, that's what they did, and I doubt they'll do it again, because they've been stung, not to mention the human element of needing to be seen as bending over backwards to accommodate anything people decide they want, be it possible, viable or fair or not because otherwise it's 'poor customer service'.

Giving good customer service and going above and beyond leaves you vulnerable to stuff like this, and then you get people saying it's your own fault for doing it. No win situation.

And when it all comes out like this, or on a review on social media, many people don't care about the paperwork or proof that the hotel have, they don't care if there's evidence (such as CCTV proving that the buffet was out for longer than the couple said - one of the reasons for the dispute in the first place) that the complaint is fabricated, in fact we've seen here that refuting claims like that by the hotel can be seen as distasteful. You're never supposed to show that a customer is wrong, being untruthful or out of order because that's poor customer service.

I'm glad this has gone the other way tbh because the amount of places that get trashed by scamming or just simply entitled people that have been in the wrong but can't possibly accept it is not on, there needs to be some balance back and people start realising they're not owed the universe because they have or they might be a customer.

ReallyTryingTo · 03/10/2022 17:56

I agree OP.
I'm all for naming and shaming them, but if you look at The Townhouse Facebook page, I actually find the status' they've put up very distasteful and pathetic really.
They're turning it into a soap opera.

However, I do hope they get paid by those scabby buggers.

N1no · 03/10/2022 20:38

Maverickess · 29/09/2022 23:23

People are pulling this kind of crap more and more, I work in hospitality and it's become quite common for people to refuse to pay over some over inflated issue, create one that's untrue or decide to take issue with something they've already agreed to, say they didn't agree and then claim they've been treated unfairly and therefore shouldn't have to pay.
I don't totally agree with all of the actions of the hotel over the online stuff if I'm honest, but I do think that if it's ok to name and shame a business and individuals that work in it (I've been publicly trashed on SM, by name, through my job) then it's ok to name and shame guests who behave like this.
People are encouraged and take pleasure almost in trashing businesses online to get something free, or for attention, this is the other side of the coin.
At the end of the day if they'd paid their bill there wouldn't be a situation at all.

The problem of unpaid bills is not limited to the hospitality industry. I make bespoke samples and always take at least 50% deposit. I would be £15k better off if everything would pay. It costs a lot of time to get those outstanding invoices paid …

sue20 · 04/10/2022 08:14

My thoughts are don’t ever concern yourself or read the Daily Mail.

Oldbutwiser · 08/10/2022 20:30

The couple deserve all they get. From what's been said they have ripped off loads of people. Then they've lied about the hotel rather than just pay up. They've brought it all on themselves. No sympathy from me.

PeppaPigsBonnet · 09/10/2022 09:19

@ReallyTryingTo I actually find the status' they've put up very distasteful and pathetic really.
They're turning it into a soap opera.

This is one of the principles of business - turning a negative into a positive !

I doubt they'll get paid now, but they're taking more hits on their FB page than on Federer's racquet. This can only be good news commercially.

BloodAndFire · 09/10/2022 20:22

PeppaPigsBonnet · 09/10/2022 09:19

@ReallyTryingTo I actually find the status' they've put up very distasteful and pathetic really.
They're turning it into a soap opera.

This is one of the principles of business - turning a negative into a positive !

I doubt they'll get paid now, but they're taking more hits on their FB page than on Federer's racquet. This can only be good news commercially.

I think Gerald Ratner proved conclusively that not all publicity is good publicity.

Personally having seen the Facebook posts and comments, and never having visited Durham, it gives me a pretty negative impression not only of the hotel but of the whole area.

Which I'm sure is unfair, but it's def made me less, not more, likely to want to go there.

SophieJo · 09/10/2022 20:26

BloodAndFire · 09/10/2022 20:22

I think Gerald Ratner proved conclusively that not all publicity is good publicity.

Personally having seen the Facebook posts and comments, and never having visited Durham, it gives me a pretty negative impression not only of the hotel but of the whole area.

Which I'm sure is unfair, but it's def made me less, not more, likely to want to go there.

How ridiculous to say it’s made you less likely to want to go there!
It’s a wonderful place for a holiday. You can’t go judging it on one the basis of one hotel.

BloodAndFire · 09/10/2022 20:38

SophieJo · 09/10/2022 20:26

How ridiculous to say it’s made you less likely to want to go there!
It’s a wonderful place for a holiday. You can’t go judging it on one the basis of one hotel.

I acknowledged in my post that it was probably unfair, but I was responding to the poster who said all publicity is good publicity. It's not.

I wouldn't visit the hotel based on this debacle, and the misogynist, homophobic and aggressive comments on the Facebook thread don't give a great impression either.

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