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AIBU?

What's your parental confession?

48 replies

ParentConfessionTime · 27/09/2022 13:33

NC here for obvious reasons. And no, not a journalist looking for a cheap story (fuck off Daily Fail and the like)

Met my NCT friends for lunch last week and led to an interesting conversation confessing things we've done as parents that before having kids we would have rolled our eyes at.

Obviously lighthearted. I'll start

When WFH my DH had one day a week with our toddler looking after him. He wanted us to all have lunch together but I used to set up a Teams meeting with my Hotmail account, bring up an old presentation then pretend I was on a very important call whenever he popped his head in, whilst I was really eating my lunch, shopping online or on Mumsnet
(Caveat, he is known for often taking a 30 min poo when childcare is involved so I didn't feel that guilty 😆)

I secretly eat snacks in random places so my toddler doesn't hear the rustling wrapper (nothing like a kit Kat while pretending to do laundry in the kitchen)

I hate the chaos of bathtime and water everywhere (now baby and toddler on the scene) so rarely give them baths unless dirty (teeth always brushed and face washed though). I particularly hate washing their hair as they kick up such a fuss.

Anyone else have any very unmummsy confessions?

OP posts:
Questions12 · 27/09/2022 14:04

He's started primary school and I'm already pissed off the amount of work I've got to do!

Funkyslippers · 04/01/2023 15:16

When DD was around 5/6 we'd go round dh's parents' house and if I wanted some rare time to myself I'd whisper to DD "why don't you ask grandma if you can stay for tea?" and she'd usually do it, with me praying she didn't say at the end "'cos mum told me to say it"!!!!

InMySpareTime · 04/01/2023 15:23

DS used to have megatantrums in the street, so I started taking a blanket to chuck on the pavement wherever he was thrashing about, and a book to read until he calmed down. After about half an hour he'd usually stop, but if I was mid-chapter I'd often leave him sniff-hiccuping until I finished the chapter.

Annoyingwurringnoise · 04/01/2023 15:40

I taught and made my DC do their own washing at the age of about 10, ostensibly because it’s a good life lesson, and also, because I got fed up of picking it up off the floor after asking them to put it in the basket for the 10th time, but really it was just because I couldn’t be arsed to do it for the next God knows how many years.

InMySpareTime · 04/01/2023 15:59

DS used to eat garden snails, and I used to let him.
Once I heard the shell crunch I knew I was never going to save the snail, I didn't fancy hooking slimy snail detritus out of his mouth, and he was so weird about food generally I figured there was probably some calcium and protein in a fresh snail.

Lndnmummy · 04/01/2023 16:03

Questions12 · 27/09/2022 14:04

He's started primary school and I'm already pissed off the amount of work I've got to do!

😂

Mybumlooksbig · 04/01/2023 23:19

My kids think we have to pre book slots for things still so if I can't be arsed doing the park.... sorry kids silly mummy forgot to book us in again

EscapeRoomToTheSun · 04/01/2023 23:22

InMySpareTime · 04/01/2023 15:59

DS used to eat garden snails, and I used to let him.
Once I heard the shell crunch I knew I was never going to save the snail, I didn't fancy hooking slimy snail detritus out of his mouth, and he was so weird about food generally I figured there was probably some calcium and protein in a fresh snail.

fresh snail

😂🐌👌

mackthepony · 04/01/2023 23:24

Whne DD was first born I watched Magic Mike XXL every day on Netflix.

mackthepony · 04/01/2023 23:24

Sorry about the bold!

EscapeRoomToTheSun · 04/01/2023 23:24

Today I pretended to have driven to the wrong place "by accident" because I couldn't be arsed to make sand sculptures.

Went for a nice refreshing cliff top walk instead. No regrets. Actually ds comforted me "don't worry mummy, I love trying out different places" Blush

SeenAndNot · 04/01/2023 23:26

I ate the Christmas smarties. They got given 4 giant tubes each. One won’t be missed surely?

Mañanarama · 04/01/2023 23:27

I keep all my best snacks in a muesli box in the cereal cupboard. They will never look in there.

SeenAndNot · 04/01/2023 23:29

Annoyingwurringnoise · 04/01/2023 15:40

I taught and made my DC do their own washing at the age of about 10, ostensibly because it’s a good life lesson, and also, because I got fed up of picking it up off the floor after asking them to put it in the basket for the 10th time, but really it was just because I couldn’t be arsed to do it for the next God knows how many years.

I’m stealing that one

WafflesOrIceCream · 04/01/2023 23:34

@Mañanarama I'm going to do exactly that!!

weewestie · 04/01/2023 23:44

SeenAndNot · 04/01/2023 23:26

I ate the Christmas smarties. They got given 4 giant tubes each. One won’t be missed surely?

Ate my sons last night. They don't taste the same anymore Sad

(He's 18, so I did ask first)

clpsmum · 04/01/2023 23:44

InMySpareTime · 04/01/2023 15:23

DS used to have megatantrums in the street, so I started taking a blanket to chuck on the pavement wherever he was thrashing about, and a book to read until he calmed down. After about half an hour he'd usually stop, but if I was mid-chapter I'd often leave him sniff-hiccuping until I finished the chapter.

You are my hero!

rickandmorts · 04/01/2023 23:46

I dropped my phone not once but twice on my pfbs head this morning when I was tired scrolling MN and bf😭

Sunset6 · 04/01/2023 23:55

When reading 4yo DD her bedtime story I often skip over sentences or whole sections just to get the thing over with quicker. She only looks at the pictures so will never pick me up on it…

Luredbyapomegranate · 04/01/2023 23:57

I used to stay on an extra night after work conferences before I went home (not shagging, just sleeping.)

But @InMySpareTime wins the thread, hands down.

DealOrNoelsDeal · 05/01/2023 00:04

AirPod and podcast in my ear during the inane “pushing on the swings” phases

BrutusMcDogface · 05/01/2023 00:07

InMySpareTime · 04/01/2023 15:59

DS used to eat garden snails, and I used to let him.
Once I heard the shell crunch I knew I was never going to save the snail, I didn't fancy hooking slimy snail detritus out of his mouth, and he was so weird about food generally I figured there was probably some calcium and protein in a fresh snail.

🤣🤣 Brilliant!

MaMisled · 05/01/2023 00:27

My ex left when DC were 3, 4 and 7. Bedtime was exhausting, it was a very upsetting, confusing period and they struggled to settle. I'd get them in PJs, push the two sofas together and tell them to "get in the boat and the carpet is water". We'd snuggle up and stay there all night. Every night. For 4 months.

misssunshine4040 · 05/01/2023 00:31

MaMisled · 05/01/2023 00:27

My ex left when DC were 3, 4 and 7. Bedtime was exhausting, it was a very upsetting, confusing period and they struggled to settle. I'd get them in PJs, push the two sofas together and tell them to "get in the boat and the carpet is water". We'd snuggle up and stay there all night. Every night. For 4 months.

This is lovely

pinkpotatoez · 05/01/2023 00:45

InMySpareTime · 04/01/2023 15:23

DS used to have megatantrums in the street, so I started taking a blanket to chuck on the pavement wherever he was thrashing about, and a book to read until he calmed down. After about half an hour he'd usually stop, but if I was mid-chapter I'd often leave him sniff-hiccuping until I finished the chapter.

I aspire to be this level of relaxed😂

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