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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be utterly broken

32 replies

SpudleyLass · 27/09/2022 10:45

I'm sure I've had my phone stolen this morning on the school run. It hasn't been turned into the school and I retraced my steps back home on the off chance that I had indeed dropped it, but I'm certain I had it with me at the school gates. My husband will check the police station at lunch time.

To cut a long story short, my DD4, is ASD Level 3, so has significant needs. The school she is currently attending is a mainstream one and I'm currently locked in battle with the LA to try to get specialist provision as literally all professionals involved with her care agree with us that she should really be in specialist provision. She has also a chromosomal disorder which affects the way she processes information, especially new information. She is predominantly non verbal and has a tendency to bite herself, others or get on all fours and headbutt walls and doors when distressed.

I'm telling you this so as to get a clear picture of our day to day life. Its a stressful one and I was already very much at the point, this morning, of feeling like we never get a ''win''.

We had to wait a few minutes at the gate this morning, surrounded by quite a few people and so this was a catalyst for a meltdown. As this happened, I moved from behind her buggy to the front and tried to give her a drink, stroke her back and generally comfort and distract her for 5 minutes.

My handbag was on an attachment to the buggy and the phone would have been visible but my priority at that point was to my daughter. I was distracted for a minute or two. When I circled back around to check the time, it was gone. I'`ve checked everywhere and it is still missing.

As I was realising this, my duaghter was still in distress and I myself burst into tears.

AIBU to utterly fed up with everything and for thinking my phone was stolen

OP posts:
GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 27/09/2022 10:48

I don’t know what to say but that all sounds so hard. What a horrible thing to happen.

JenniferBarkley · 27/09/2022 10:49

YANBU. You poor thing. The phone is of course a fixable problem, but it's not about the phone is it. Sounds like you're doing a great job with your DD. If someone pounced on your phone while you were comforting her, then they are the absolute lowest of the low.

Please cut yourself some slack and if you can, try get a bit of downtime today for a coffee and some cake. Flowers

Mamamia7962 · 27/09/2022 10:53

How annoying and upsetting for you. Do you have a local Facebook page, it might be worth checking on there. There's still time for someone to hand it in to the school. Has your husband tried ringing it?

Bundlesofchocforme · 27/09/2022 10:54

I’m so sorry, you deserve better than this. I really hope you get the support you deserve and need to access the appropriate education for your dd.

keeping everything crossed you find your phone too x

SleepingStandingUp · 27/09/2022 10:55

I'm so sorry OP. Just send hugs and empathy

Original poster
SpudleyLass · 27/09/2022 10:59

Mamamia7962 · 27/09/2022 10:53

How annoying and upsetting for you. Do you have a local Facebook page, it might be worth checking on there. There's still time for someone to hand it in to the school. Has your husband tried ringing it?

Thank you, yes I've posted to the local FB page and keeping my fingers crossed.

I'`d rather not believe somebody took advantage of us but unfortunately, I think this is exactly what has happened 😔

OP posts:
MacarenaMacarena · 27/09/2022 10:59

Life sounds really tough right now OP, and your phone going missing must feel like the last straw. Inconvenient, expensive and frustrating at the best of times. But there is a chance it will turn up - maybe a child took it and the parent will discover it soon and drop it into the school. Maybe ring school again and ask if it can be mentioned on school website/newsletter/message board at gate. Put a few posters up.
It sounds like you have bigger issues to deal with - very best wishes for finding a happy and fulfilling school placement for your DC.

MrPoppysParka · 27/09/2022 11:02

Is it an iPhone? Do you have find my phone on it that you can use? What a horrible situation.

Kissingfrogs25 · 27/09/2022 11:22

You sound worn out, and this was the final straw. I would be taking a day off to recuperate, recharge and get some self care into your day.

missbipolar · 27/09/2022 11:27

Is it an iPhone or if Android are you logged into your Google account?

scissorsandsellotape · 27/09/2022 11:28

Oh shit op
I am sorry to hear this
And other way of looking at it (which may be a stretch today) is that the person who stole it is not in a good place either

MugginsOverEre · 27/09/2022 11:53

I hope things beget better soon for you. It sounds like you're having the shittest of days. Have you got find iPhone, life 360, Google maps etc? Phones are expensive these days and if it's one worth nicking (I'm assuming yours isn't a crappy old flip phone) most have some sort of tracking or at the very least disabling technology on it. If a child nicked it, it'll be showing as in school and you can organise something with the school to help find it. They won't want their pupils getting away with theft on school property.

Clarinet1 · 27/09/2022 11:57

Oh OP, I’m so sorry. It sounds as though you’ve got a lot on your plate at the moment. I’m sending a handhold and a unmumsnetty hug! Try and think in small steps - DH is going to contact the police. DC is at school. I second the idea of cake!

JustDanceAddict · 27/09/2022 11:59

Sorry to hear all this. Re the phone, try and track it and then lock it down if you can’t (Google how to do it on your specific model).

FayeGovan · 27/09/2022 12:25

Im sorry to read this op, that sounds crap and so unfair. Im sending you a wee hug.🥰

HangOnToYourself · 27/09/2022 12:29

It sounds like the phone was the last straw and you are incredibly overwhelmed at the moment. I dont have much advice but wanted to offer some sympathy 💐
Do you have any gadget or contents insurance you could put in a claim for if you cant find your phone at least?

HangOnToYourself · 27/09/2022 12:31

This is a good song for days like this

VampiresWife · 27/09/2022 12:43

Oh OP, what a pile of shit. I'm sorry you're having such a crap time, as a PP said it sounds like the phone has just tipped you over the edge. I've no advice to offer unfortunately but just wanted to say I sympathise 💐

MrPoppysParka · 27/09/2022 12:44

scissorsandsellotape · 27/09/2022 11:28

Oh shit op
I am sorry to hear this
And other way of looking at it (which may be a stretch today) is that the person who stole it is not in a good place either

Lol. Poor them, with their new stolen phone. My heart bleeds.

HangOnToYourself · 27/09/2022 12:51

MrPoppysParka · 27/09/2022 12:44

Lol. Poor them, with their new stolen phone. My heart bleeds.

Show quote history

Yeah I'm a bit sick of this virtue signalling nonsense at the moment that everyone who steals must be doing it to feed a starving family 🙄thieving little scroates have been around since the dawn of time, not just since our heating Bill's went up

FlounderingFruitcake · 27/09/2022 12:51

Can’t you track it with Find my Iphone or Android equivalent? If it has indeed been stolen you’ll definitely want to use that function to brick it but hopefully it’s just misplaced like maybe it got knocked out and fell out of your eye-line and/or someone took it in to the school reception. Sympathies for a shit morning though.

Frazzledmummy123 · 27/09/2022 12:58

I am so sorry this happened 💕. I hope you get it back somehow. Report it stolen to the police and you just never know.

Is there a chance if it was visible in ur bag it could have fallen out your bag on your way to the school? Maybe it will be handed in, there is still hope. If it was stolen, whoever would do that is the lowest of the low.

I hope things get better soon all round, and you get your phone back.

Ofcourseshecan · 27/09/2022 13:05

Sending love and sympathy to you xx

Always4Brenner · 27/09/2022 13:08

Hugs loads of them I hope your phone is returned you’ve enough to deal with without this as well. If it has been stolen I hope karma hits the lowlife big time, I hope their sterile so they can’t pass their genes on.

feellikeanalien · 27/09/2022 13:09

It's really shit isn't it OP. I had my phone stolen when I was in hospital recovering from emergency surgery after DD was born prematurely. Some people are just totally amoral.

I sympathise with you about the SEN provision. I had similar with DD and they were trying to push me into sending her to mainstream. I had a very supportive SENCO and head at her primary school which really helped. Have you tried IPSEA? They support parents who are fighting to get proper provision for their children. A friend of mine went to them and said they were very good.

It's really shit isn't it when you have to struggle all the time and something like this can be just the last straw.

Sending you 💐

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