Fling has messaged again...what do I do?

[Hazeleyeslie75]

N/c
So awhile ago when me and dh were on a break had a fling with a childhood friend who I just got chatting to via social media.
He was very persistent, wanted more..didnt take no for an answer. After me and dh rekindled, he has messaged a couple of times
EACH time I have blown him off in somewhat polite and impolite ways (was not getting the message)
Last message sent at Christmas where I basically told him to get lost.

Last night got a message again and a friend request. So its been almost a year :(

What on earth do I do? I am afraid he will ruin things
Also, this is gettin beyond freaky now.

Be nice, polite & firm with your ‘goodbye, no more’ message and tell him you won’t be replying again.
Then ignore everything else he sends to you and stay strong. Be prepared for the messages to get worse and worse as he gets more desperate and tries everything. But do not ever reply to ANYTHING ever again ever.
He will get the message. Eventually. And this will stop.
(unless of course you don’t want it to).

What possible reason could there be not to tell husband? Especially if he told you. Why would the guy message your husband? To say what?

OP - you’ve come here for advice, but you can’t block the guy and you can’t tell your husband.

Not really sure what sort of advice you want us to rustle up, to be honest.

Or tell the whole story…

OP with the greatest of respect this is utterly absurd

HOW would you “out yourself” by simply describing the structural reason why DH “cannot know” about the other man?

As in,

“I knew the other man and had told DH I had become mates with him again. DH would feel betrayed as I hadn’t told him the whole truth”.

or

“DH met the other man as a new family friend. He would be livid as he started to like the bloke. He doesn’t know it became physical.”

or

“they weirdly work together so I can’t risk it or else it all blows up..”

i mean I could go on, but is any of that outing? Is it really?

I think you love drama @Hazeleyeslie75 , you seem to adore the frisson of mystery and could well enjoy the fact that your DH is vulnerable for having put his cards on the table with his flings, but you have your little secret to keep you feeling special…

Sorry if I’ve missed this info, but do you have children with DH?

I suspect that the OP does have a child, born about nine months after her fling, and if she tells her DH about it, there will be a question over the child’s paternity - possibly with good reason.

I'm confused, were you on a break or were you on a 'make or break' aka still together and trying to work things out?

@PorkPieAndAPickledOnion

Exactly my thoughts.

Thought exactly the same, hence the Q