To think these comments left by my gp were rude

[Ispy9]

This isn’t really relevant anymore as I am in a much better place now than I was but I’m still quite annoyed about it. A year ago I was suffering quite badly with anxiety and depression so I went and saw my GP about it.

I recently downloaded the NHS App and I thought I’d have a look through my notes. I saw that on the appointment about my mental health my GP had wrote these notes.

‘Examination: Not sleeping, not looking after herself. Unkempt, looking down, shoulders hunched, not wearing a bra, hair not brushed’

aibu to think these comments on my file are quite rude?

I realise OP, that seeing a description of yourself at your lowest would feel shocking and invasive. This, however, is part of a regular mental health assessment.

Is the person clean and tidy, or disheveled, filthy and smell? Are there bruises or signs of abuse? Are they wearing weather appropriate clothing? Wearing a T-shirt,shorts and shoeless in the middle of heavy snow for example? These are all subtle clues that clinicians use to check on a patients welfare and mental wellbeing.

Were the observations true from that time? If not- speak to your GP.

I'm glad your mental health has improved and you are in a better place.

They aren't subjective though. Unbrushed hair is not subjective it's a fact. Not wearing a bra is a fact. The OP has gone to the Gp about her low mood. Presumably the GP is using the notes to explain their diagnosis, and essentially justify their treatment. Of course appearance is part of that.

I'm really interested in how he knew you weren't wearing a bra?

What gender are you ??? Because any woman knows the answer to this.

op don’t answer this.

I can always tell when my friend is struggling with her mental health because she stops shaving her armpits. Personally, I never shave mine but she always does when she’s well so it’s a reasonable indicator. It would seem like a strange thing to show up it medical notes, but could also be useful clinically.

I can see all the notes made by my GP on the app, even answers I gave word for word. Just depends on how much information the GP has chosen to write I think. Other entries are just coded and illegible to me.

I mask struggling a huge amount - five minutes before giving birth to my second child I had to ask if anyone was on hand as I needed to push (I am serious) - they didn't believe me as I wasn't screaming and shouting, I just don't. Not presenting in a 'normal' way is a problem. I appreciate this is for a mental health assessment, so a little different, but it's made me think about a lot of times I've had a judgement or assessment made (without my knowledge of the impact until later). Only you know if they were accurate to give that as a picture of your mental health state at that time though (with our without the weird bra thing), but I have felt judged on the 'normal woman' scale without knowing it.

Oh for goodness sake, I have heard it all now.

The GP isn't judging her for not wearing a bra, or being unkempt, you utter pilchard. The GP is concerned that these are outward signs of poor mental health. This is an important part of a mental health examination. Do you really think that everyone suffering from poor mental health gives a perfect description of their symptoms, and that all that doctors have to do to make a diagnosis is to listen to a convenient list of symptoms that the patient recites? You really do not have a clue.

People with severe mental illness may not be able to articulate what is happening, or may be too frightened to do so. They may have delusions that they are being controlled by external forces, or that they will be punished by demons if they disclose what is happening to them (I'm not suggesting that this was the case with the OP, but it certainly is with some mentally ill patients). Any conscientious HCP will pay attention to body language, demeanour, clothing etc. Otherwise you can miss serious, and potentially dangerous, illness.

I thought the same, bra comment is unacceptable, rest merely judgemental but possibly informative.

The GP isn't judging her for not wearing a bra, or being unkempt, you utter pilchard

well said. Some of the stuff posted is batshit.

My hair looks unbrushed 5 minutes after I brush it. I don’t wear bras and for the record I also don’t shave and I mainly wear comfy lounge style clothes. I’m not depressed. I just don’t give a flying fuck about conforming to how men think I should look!

Unfortunately it IS important they note these factual observations because the medical profession doesn’t seem to think a person can be severely mentally unwell unless they turn up at appointments with dirty unbrushed hair, trackies/T-shirt covered in pot noodle (or other easy to make food of your choice) and smelling unwashed.

This is due to stereotyping typing about what mental illness ‘looks like’ and looking clean and brushed for an appointment even if you haven’t showered in weeks but dragged yourself to do so, just to be able to leave the house for the appointment, will prejudice how unwell they think you are.

I speak from experience.

Although it must be upsetting to read such observations it will have helped your GP form a picture of you clearly not seeming ‘well’ (according to thier expectations of what depressed ‘looks like’ ) and to take how you told them you were feeling seriously.

Same.

My GP wrote ‘on examination, she is a pale, thin woman’ on my referral for fertility investigations. I asked my friend who is a GP what that had to do with anything as she said it was code for ‘too thin to conceive!’

This is weird and I’m complain about that comment.

the rest of it symptoms of your mental health fine

I see why they might note this.

However the worse I feel the tidier my house is and the more effort I make with my appearance to try to hang on a bit of control, and from previous comments it seems I’m not alone.

Rubbish. You just have a very narrow minded idea of how women should present and behave. Nice name calling, hope you don't work with ill people, you sound like a bully.

The bra thing is stupid considering about 70% of young women I know don’t wear one but the rest is fair enough, it’s part of them assessing your mental state

Wtf us a gender ?
If you mean biological sex.....my SEX is female.

As for my question about the bra,it remains the same.
Also , it's not compulsory for women to wear a bra !

Likewise. When I was suffering severe enough depression that I had just come out of hospital, but still very unwell, I washed and blow-dried my hair and put on a full face of makeup to go and commit suicide. I wouldn’t have fitted the unkempt stereotype of the depressed person at all.

The bra comment is absolutely ridiculous. Many many women choose not to wear a bra for all sorts of reasons I don't understand how the doctor came to that conclusion and I would be questioning it to he honest

Not my experience at all. I've had a severe MH crisis before deciding what bridge I would jump off later. I didn't tell that to a soul and I turned up for my appointment wearing clean, ironed and matching clothes, my hair done and makeup on. My usual look, I like to look put together. My GP got what was wrong with my immediately and almost had me sectioned until I promised I'd be supervised at home and the MH team could visit me there to check on me.

Your GP was presenting a visual picture of how you appear. It wasn't rude. YourGP felt that your appearance reflected your mental health.

If I went to my GP about my mental health , they would need evidence to corroborate any drug regimen or further intervention. This would include my appearance.
If I arrived for my appointment with isosceles eyebrows, gel nails, a Mulberry handbag, in Lycra/active wear and sporting a tan then it would appear that I was taking care of my appearance. That's a huge marker.

If, however,I turned up to an appointment with jagged, bitten nails, unwashed hair, in wide baggy slacks and stained tunic sporting a carrier bag , then that's also an indicator.

Surely you understand that?

@StickywithSuncream I do hope you are feeling better now. I also made tremendous efforts to look 'feminine' and pretty when I was young, and very low. Now I am better and on an even keel I accept myself and make less effort, because I like myself as I am.

Everyone questioning the bra comment. Patients who are seen by psychiatry will all have "seen on ICU sitting up in bed wearing a hospital gown". Of course they are, all the patients on the unit will be wearing gowns, doesn't mean anything at all.