To hate voicenotes?

[Bluemiddy]

Just that really.
I have this one friend that only communicates in voicenotes. Which is fine.
However, she only talks about herself. If I reply with anything that's happened to me or remotely relevant to me or my life she ignores it completely.
She also talks to her kids whilst on voicenotes so half of the recording is her saying "what's that darling" "yes you can have a biscuit" etc etc.
I've started just keeping the voicenotes short and sweet and not mentioning me anymore to see if she gets the hint but she doesn't.
Her voicenotes can be up to 20 mins long.
I don't know how to approach it without upsetting her. We've been mates for 15 plus years but it's starting to make me dislike her as a person.
It's starting to get to the place where I dread it when I see her name pop up

Don’t like them🤢 if you want to actually speak to me then phone. Or fire round. Fuck off with the voice notes

I exchange very long voice notes with a friend who lives in a time zone 11 hours behind me. She records them while walking the dog in the morning, and I listen to them when I can while cooking or walking. I love hearing her voice.

For people in my time zone or for quick messages with other friends, I just write but I don't mind if they respond with a VN. If they are walking and need to respond, VN are much easier. I can't walk and type

YANBU voice notes are hideous

I'm in a class group chat and one mum sends them... for up to 5 minutes... no one cares you are in the middle drying your hair / eating biscuits! No way she would bother with all the pointless irrelevant info if she had to write it out... she actually complained there was a word limit on a message the other day though so clearly isn't getting the hint that she's over sharing!!

I don't think my iphone is set up to get them? I've only heard of them because of MN. I have voicemail.

There's a button to do it on FB messenger and on WhatsApp. Little microphone that you hold down to talk, if you are looking.

YANBU find them really really annoying and totally pointless 🤨

Oh, I don't allow apps to access the microphone so .i'm guessing no one on Whatsapp could send them if they tried.

I only have Whatsapp for one group and they wouldn't do anything nuts like that. I got worried in case it was going to become a standard feature of phones.

The app permissions thing only applies to your phone. Someone else could still send you one.

Although thankfully it sounds like your friends are too sensible to do so!

Oh darn it! Sounded like there was a way then to prevent someone from sending you one.

I voted with a lighthearted YABU because I can't believe you even listen to them, I wouldn't, and haven't told your friend to stop sending them.

Oh, okay. I will watch out for that. But only being in one WA group helps!

I despise voice notes, my friends sometimes send them because it's more convenient for them to speak into their phones rather than type it out, but for me.. I'm usually around people/at work etc so if I want to listen to a voice note I'd have to connect my phone to headphones etc, it's just an inconvenience, also sometimes they're so long I forget what they said at the start whereas if it was a written message I'd be able to read it back.. I pretty much just don't listen when friends send voice notes to be honest because if I can't listen straight away then I forget

DH’s ex-wife only ever uses them and it feels so intrusive into our life. It just brings up all the hurt she’s caused in our lives having to hear her awful voice in our home, which I consider our safe space.

I delete them before listening to them and then return the persons call.

Oh I so hate them too, 20 minutes is very long, I struggle with 5 minutes of one. There's a couple of people I know who use them all the time, another person who swaps between texting and voice notes and another who whispers when leaving one 🤔 those and face timers should be banned from contacting me.

Ha I find it funny how much Mumsnet hate voice notes. I mean I wouldn't appreciate one off my boss but off my friends I really enjoy them.

Easy to make arrangements and good for when you're doing jobs around the house makes it much more interesting! I listen to my friends ones as im driving and can record ones back while I'm putting washing away or getting ready etc etc.

Don't send them to everyone as I know the hate is out there but I love a good voice note session but then I like people and find my friends interesting.

I only use them with my OH so if I'm out walking the dog and can't text I'll send a quick one if needed. He's useless at picking up the phone and I know wouldn't listen to a voicemail. And I can tell if he's received it. I don't do it with anyone else

They are beyond rude and self-indulgent. Call me or text me.

OP - just ignore and delete. Then when she follows up, just breezily say you don’t have time to listen to long (don’t give a time length) voice notes, so if she needs to get hold of you, either call or text.

There’s absolutely nothing rude in that, and she will know that the opining voice notes are simply disappearing into the ether.

I intensely dislike them for all the reasons mentioned above. I have one friend who uses them who used to text while driving, so I suppose this is an improvement.