The swishy blonde ponytail mums and others

[Doeshethinkhesinpeakyblinders]

Just started school run for the first time with my dc, interesting to observe the different mums.
The type of mum I want to be the most is one of the bouncy, swishy blonde ponytails ones wearing gym gear. I also saw the well put together, professional ones in the suits…perfect make up and jewellery..reeking of class and top organisational skills.
Then we have the mums with more than one, usually juggling the bags with the tiny baby or errant toddler, slightly stressy looking or just gone-completely dead tired.
As it happens I’m the fairly inconspicuous one who shuffles past-jeans and converse, never really late but almost always just about to be…one dc but still fairly stressy, not bouncy, not well polished…but off home to clean up dog poo.

Which are you?

I agree with PPs saying don’t put women into boxes and types. We don’t do it nearly so much with men.

However, I was interested in your type of “Mum of more than one juggling the baby etc” - I think you may have not spotted that many of the people your are mums of more than one, with older children. These are probably the people you think have it all together because they’ve been at it for a while. They may also be the ones not giving a shit for any of the “politics”.

Kind of this.

I am all of the above, well paid professional job, many bags and always slightly stressed/ sleep deprived looking, plus most days in gym gear as I do my job from home.

Don't put yourself or others in boxes.

Thanks for an interesting and fun thread. Brings back memories although my DSs have both graduated from university. The groups of mothers I remember were completely different. We had the academics working at Cambridge university as lecturers or in labs etc. No power dressing but they tended to take their children's progress very seriously. Then we had the PTA types. They seemed to love the school, were blind to its faults (and all schools have them) and were occasionally scathing if some of us chose not to participate in the PTA, to which they devoted a great deal of time and energy. Then there were the political mums. Socialising was important to them. A lot of undercurrents with that group. Finally, the rest of us. We just took our children and collected them. Hope you enjoy the school run and become a pony tail swisher. Don't be upset by some of the responses you've had.

I'm the scruffy one working at home and dread being called out at pick up cos I look like shite. Luckily DD comes home alone

Awwww thanks.

I was a nerd at school and cared to the point of stress-anxiety about what people thought of me, while trying also to be invisible. Then I came out the other side and couldn't give a shiny shit most days. About what people think of me, or indeed what other people are doing or are dressed as. I think 96% of us are doing the best we can on any given day (the other 4% are the narcissists, the judgy-pants, and other sociopaths) and we should celebrate getting the kids to school on time to be there to see other parents doing the same.

Ha What dad's?

I'm sure op doesn't want to be stereotyped as a dad though!

You can't be ugly, as you're the agony aunt who makes kids laugh - which means you have to be approachable on the outside, with an inner calm and beauty that won't fade with age.

Pretty is all fine and well (and I understand the principles of pretty-privilege), but it's a luck of genetics or money and a good surgeon and not an actual accomplishment. Getting kids to laugh, now that is a skill.

No doubt. My job started and finished early so I picked them up. I think we were regarded as inadequate weirdos. Or maybe just - gasp - unemployed , as one of the mums assumed I was.

But that was a few years back. Attitudes may have changed.

I’m the aggressive looking one. Like I’m going to punch anyone that speaks to me.

Im not, it’s just my Botox has run out and I can’t afford more right now and an aggressive looking frown has taken up permanent residence on my face.