Have decided after years of misery married to an on off addict and history of physical and emotional abuse that I need to get out. It’s been a long road. His addictions led to physical abuse on multiple occasions. He’s drinking daily again and goes out coming home early hours of the morning. I’ve voiced the pain this causes me and pleaded with him to get professional help but he thinks I’m a party pooper ruining his fun. He’s never really taken responsibility for this family and when he gets like this he withdraws financial support and leaves me to foot the bill for everything on very little income as I work part time so I can be available for the school run.
I’ve had enough and can’t do this anymore. It’s awful for the children to witness and I’m miserable. We’ve both decided he won’t change (he refuses to acknowledge his problems). Problem is he owns the house and another house. Money he received after a compensation pay out for an accident that happened before we got together. Meant to be loss of earnings but he works full time. He got the money once we got together. He bought the family home for us to live in. We’ve got multiple children together now. Married for 7 years together 10.
ive just calmly sat him down and said that we need ti be amicable for the children and come to arrangements over where we will live, what assets will go where etc. He says his compensation is strictly his in the eyes of the law. He has just angrily got right in my face again and shouted I’m a money grabber showing my true colours because I said marital assets are split 50/50 to start and then go from there. I would do the lions share of the childcare. I assume he’d have them on alternate weekends and half the holidays. I think he’ll be ok with that. He has lots of family local. I have no family local so would most likely move nearer to family about an hour away. He says he will sell the family home and I would buy a house to live in while the children grow up then he’d get it all back again afterwards. I personally feel I’m entitled to something but wonder am I being totally unreasonable? Does the law support me to be left with something as I won’t be able to afford to buy something myself whilst I’m raising our children? I realise I need to get solicitor advice. He says I don’t need ti because he already knows I’ll get nothing. He’s also refusing to move out while we go through the divorce. I honestly feel uncomfortable living with him during this process due to the history. If anyone could offer me some advice or reassurance. The future looks bleak really and he’s such a selfish angry person.