AIBU to say our 14yo can't go to the football on his own?.

[wonkylegs]

Our 14yo thinks I'm the worlds worst mum for saying he can't go to the premiership football game this weekend on his own.
DH & DS1 have season tickets but DH is working this weekend so they can't go.
We tried to find someone else to take him but unfortunately there is no one else who can and I have to look after DS2.
He's a sensible lad but it's an hour away (he can get the train) and although the crowd are usually good natured it's 50,000 people and the drunk prays are usually on the train.
He can go to the next one.
AIBU?

I think yabu, especially if it is a 3pm KO. He will be home around 6pm. If he is familiar with the ground and procedures etc, he will be fine. Presumably there will be lots of police on hand. Have you ever been to a match at the ground? What does your DH think?

I would let him go alone at 14. I went a lot further when I was alot younger! It seems society as a whole is a lot more protective nowadays.

I agree with this.
Ive seen far worse behaviour at conference north games than I have at premier league games. The only bit of trouble I’ve ever seen at a PL game (drunk middle aged man giving a steward abuse) saw said drunk middle aged man ejected from the stadium by two huge police officers in less than 60 seconds

Can you get someone to look after DS2 and you go with him?

I’d get a friend of his to go but I’d take ds2 for an afternoon out in the city and travel on the train with them, meet them after to buy them a McDonald’s and travel back together.

Let him go. If you are that worried drop him and pick him up from the station. Football fans have a bad name but they don’t go around picking on 14 years olds who are themselves not looking for trouble

If they are season ticket holders, is he familiar with the ground, what happens at matches etc? I'd go on the train with both boys, let eldest go to the match, take youngest somewhere else for a bit and then meet up at the end. So next time your DH is working you are one step closer to DS being ready to go himself.

I would definitely let him go at 14. Can't he take a friend. Just tell him to wear a hoodie over his football top on the train stick his air pods in and he will be fine.

All go down by car together. Drop ds1 off and take ds2 somewhere nice, cinema etc

Is it Newcastle or Spurs?

Actually maybe not if it is Leeds.

Ds used to go alone all over the country to see his team from 14.

It won't be Leeds, their match has been postponed.

It's newcastle

My son (now 18) has been going to Arsenal on his own from our home on the Surrey / South London border for a good few years. Started off with daytime matches only but progressed to evening matches too. It’s been great for him, he can navigate the tube and is confident travelling on his own. He knows the rules around away fans etc - he’s very sensible. I did push back at first, but his dad persuaded me he could do it, and he could. If you’re not happy about it though, just say you’re not discussing it again

I think that 14 is ok. I’d be happier if he went with a sensible friend. Straight there and back. Phone switched on at all times etc etc. I’d say the same if it were rugby or cricket or a concert at that distance too.

14
nope

I think I'd let him go with a friend I trusted.

Newcastle stadium is right in the middle of the city, take him to the stadium, potter with ds2 for two hours, meet him after.

or perhaps ds2 would like to go with hum
and you get two hours peace.

Since they're at home to Bournemouth I can't think of a fixture where the away fans would pose less of a threat.

Newcastle? Hmm.
Wouldn't let ds2 (14) go to a spurs v Arsenal game on his own!

Against Bournemouth? Should be ok. With a peer friend.

DS2 is only 6 so he definitely has to stay with me and is not interested in football anyway.
I don't think I'm worried about the game itself so much as the getting to and from it.
He's encountered trouble on the train before with his dad and didn't like it. Not sure how he would deal with it on his own. He's a big lad and looks older, just doesn't have the experience or the common sense.
I'll consider driving up with him and mooching round newcastle with DS2 but I think I won't say I'm considering it til I'm a bit more sure.
Unfortunately most of his mates aren't NUFC fans and none that are around this weekend have interest in coming with him.

Where do you live in relation to Newcastle (you dont have to say exactly just North South etc) I could probably come up with somewhere for you and DS2 to go and somewhere for DS1 to get dropped off at a suitable metro stop etc

With a 6 year old, I'd go to the discovery museum for a couple of hours! Just round the corner, but only open til 4pm.