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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Changing for PE

132 replies

Flymetothezoom · 09/09/2022 18:14

My 7 year old son used to wear his PE kit to school on PE days. Now the school has said they want children to change in the classroom again. Parents have complained that their kids don’t want to do this. The head has sent a letter saying that:

”I understand that some parents and children are a little worried about changing into their PE kits in front of their peers. As this is something that we regularly did prior to Covid, we would like to bring back this process as part of a normal school activity.”

Why should children have to get used to changing in front of each other and their teachers? This isn’t a life skill. It is archaic and weird. As an adult I have never had to change with 26 men and women, in a room with many uncovered windows. Would I be wrong to write to the head and complain about this?

YABU: kids should change in front of each other and the teacher
YANBU: it is odd that it was ever allowed even before covid.

OP posts:
Newrumpus · 09/09/2022 18:16

Can you think of any differences between children and adults when it comes to getting undressed?

TeaAndBiscuitsAndWine · 09/09/2022 18:17

At this age they are some of them starting to get self conscious and aware of body differences and I think the school should respect that.

titchy · 09/09/2022 18:17

Of course changing quickly is a life skill for small children. They're 7 - what exactly do you think is going to happen when they see each other's pants? Once they're a bit older the boys and girls will be separated which is entirely appropriate.

JustAWeirdoWithNoName · 09/09/2022 18:19

Can your DS articulate why he doesn't want to? Is he worried about the more technical aspect of getting changed (e.g. shoe laces or buttons) or is it the modesty aspect?
We all got changed in the classroom at school and I don't really remember worrying about the modesty aspect until I was at least Year 7 (by which time we were in sex-segregated changing rooms anyway) - it's not like they take their underwear off so no different than being in swimming costumes really.

FatAgainItsLettuceTime · 09/09/2022 18:19

They tried that towards the end of last year in DDs primary and everyone just ignored it and sent kids in PE kit.

DD is 8 now in yr4 and has expressed that she doesn't want the boys to see her in her underwear which I think is fair enough so she goes in on PE days wearing her Pe kit and will regardless of what the school say.

Krakinou · 09/09/2022 18:21

They’re young children and they’re not getting naked. Presumably they’re all wearing pants and a vest. It’d be better if the school had changing areas (separate for girls and boys) but I don’t think it’s such a big deal at their age. And better than sitting in smelly clothes all afternoon.

JustAWeirdoWithNoName · 09/09/2022 18:22

JustAWeirdoWithNoName · 09/09/2022 18:19

Can your DS articulate why he doesn't want to? Is he worried about the more technical aspect of getting changed (e.g. shoe laces or buttons) or is it the modesty aspect?
We all got changed in the classroom at school and I don't really remember worrying about the modesty aspect until I was at least Year 7 (by which time we were in sex-segregated changing rooms anyway) - it's not like they take their underwear off so no different than being in swimming costumes really.

Sorry not sure why I thought you said your DS didn't want to!

XtinaCaligulara · 09/09/2022 18:23

YABU

They're 7 ffs

This is normal and been going on since I was at primary school years ago

SpongeBob2022 · 09/09/2022 18:24

The 'wear your PE kit on PE day' rule was the best thing to come out of school lockdown!

Our school have kept it so far. Regardless of the modesty issue described above it makes complete sense to me. It's easier all round and saves time and things going missing.

I am a rule follower and wouldn't flout them but I agree yanbu.

bythere · 09/09/2022 18:25

"As an adult I have never had to change with 26 men and women"

Big difference between men and women together and young children together.

DreamingofItaly2023 · 09/09/2022 18:28

DS has struggled with this as the school rightly drummed the PANTS rule into all the children and now he feels confused. He feels that his pants are private and doesn’t like others seeing him in just his pants. He doesn’t want me to speak to the school however.

I was so disappointed about the change, I thought going in in your PE kit would be the one good thing to come out of COVID.

mac1974 · 09/09/2022 18:29

@SpongeBob2022 I agree it must save the teachers loads of hassle too.

nachoavocado · 09/09/2022 18:34

XtinaCaligulara · 09/09/2022 18:23

YABU

They're 7 ffs

This is normal and been going on since I was at primary school years ago

Doesn't mean it should be

ImSoMagical · 09/09/2022 18:34

I agree with wearing pe kit on pe days. It must save time and no faffing about changing clothes. Also, the amount of stuff that goes missing or goes into lost property must be massively reduced! As a mum I find it much easier to send them in pe kit.

Dippydinosaurus · 09/09/2022 18:35

It's a key skill in EYFS and due to covid they would have missed out. But having 30 PE kits in the class is something no teacher misses as well as wasting part of the PE lesson changing

RedHelenB · 09/09/2022 18:37

I just assumed things went back to normal after covid, mumsnet is do uptight about aone things

MissCatLady · 09/09/2022 18:37

I'm a year 1 teacher, we do PE twice a week and children are expected to change at school. I hate it, it wastes so much time and every week our lost property pile gets bigger with unnamed clothes and shoes. We then have to deal with annoyed parents when their kids are missing PE kit.

SkyLarkDescending · 09/09/2022 18:38

I agree that it is much easier for many teachers to have children come to school in kit. Plus lots of time saved which can be spent on more PE or other learning.

However, I think 'PE kit' can be interpreted loosely sometimes by parents and so you get lots of problems with children not in correct uniform. Some heads like to keep tight control over uniform and have children looking smarter in photos/for OFSTED etc.

Personally, I think children are comfier and more relaxed in PE kit and tend to play and learn better.

Thereisnolight · 09/09/2022 18:39

It’s very strange.
A massive waste of time which could be used to actually do PE.
And if even one child feels uncomfortable with it their view should be respected.

emergencyblimp · 09/09/2022 18:40

In my 20 y/o daughter’s primary school the rule was if the children forgot their PE kit (or, as we’re in a deprived area, couldn’t afford one) it was vest and knickers until year 6 — even for outdoor PE! I couldn’t image a child at 7 being concerned about their modesty, half of them surely spend their days out of school running about in knickers anyway.

I think that children should learn the art of quickly changing, after all they’ll get to secondary and will still have to change but won’t have had much practice at all.

mrsbitaly · 09/09/2022 18:41

My daughter used to hate getting changed in front of others when children had to go school in their PE kits she was much more comfortable. I can see no reason why they can't continue this as it cuts down on wasted lesson time having to change and prevents children feeling uncomfortable. If they reinstate having to change at school I will be ignoring this and sending her in PE. It's weird forcing children to change in front of others no need for it if they don't want to.

Goingforarun · 09/09/2022 18:42

Providing separate changing spaces sexualises children. Why would you do that?

Thereisnolight · 09/09/2022 18:42

emergencyblimp · 09/09/2022 18:40

In my 20 y/o daughter’s primary school the rule was if the children forgot their PE kit (or, as we’re in a deprived area, couldn’t afford one) it was vest and knickers until year 6 — even for outdoor PE! I couldn’t image a child at 7 being concerned about their modesty, half of them surely spend their days out of school running about in knickers anyway.

I think that children should learn the art of quickly changing, after all they’ll get to secondary and will still have to change but won’t have had much practice at all.

Just because you can’t imagine a 7 year old worrying about their modesty doesn’t mean some of them don’t.
Some of the views on this thread are strange.

Marblessolveeverything · 09/09/2022 18:43

This is a baffling in the age of child protection. I don't know of this practice anywhere in Ireland and amazingly we don't have generations of people unable to dress themselves. Surely the time could be better spent.

Thereisnolight · 09/09/2022 18:43

Never met a 7 year old running around in their knickers outside of their own home.

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