AIBU?
To expect her to pay?
Lavender14 · 08/09/2022 08:40
So a woman on my street who I've previously got on really well with has hit my car and caused a bit of damage. She was annoyed at the time but she backed into my car and there were witnesses so she couldn't really deny blame. Initially she said she would pay for it and said she had a relative who could do the work, however the relative hasn't shown up after weeks of back and forth and now I'm starting to doubt the relative exists. I took the car to get a quote and told her the cost and now she's not replying. How long do I give her to come up with the money? The last thing I want is to make it awkward with someone I live a few doors down from and I know money is probably tight for her especially at the minute so want to be fair, but at the same time I would like the car fixed. Its not off the road with the damage or anything but just has a big dent at the front and green paint scrapes all over it. What would you do?
Am I being unreasonable?
AIBUYou have one vote. All votes are anonymous.
Christmasiscominghohoho · 08/09/2022 08:41
If she doesn’t have the money she’s not going to pay. So just go via insurance.
CheshireCats · 08/09/2022 08:42
That's what sh has insurance for...
Go through your insurance.
Ommommomm · 08/09/2022 08:43
You should remind her that she should have notified her insurance company as soon as the accident occurred.
Are you able to get a statement from the witnesses?
MyDogandClowns · 08/09/2022 08:46
My husband reversed into our neighbour's car and he left a note and it went through my husband's insurance. As it should.
A minor dent cost £450 to put right.
You will need to notify your insurance company so they can set the ball rolling to contact your neighbour's ins. co.
nachoavocado · 08/09/2022 08:46
Say you need your car fixed so are going to go through insurance now
Lavender14 · 08/09/2022 08:50
So she asked specifically not to go through the insurance at the start, and because we've been friendly I didn't doubt for a second that she'd pay but now it's been a few weeks- could I get in trouble for not having told my insurance at the time? As I said it's not a super urgent job and with the quote given, if it were me I'd just pay it instead of having a claim on my insurance and my premium going up. So that's why I want to be reasonable because she's not said she won't pay just hasn't committed to paying either. Question im stuck on is how long would you give her to come up with the money?
luckylavender · 08/09/2022 08:52
Lavender14 · 08/09/2022 08:50
So she asked specifically not to go through the insurance at the start, and because we've been friendly I didn't doubt for a second that she'd pay but now it's been a few weeks- could I get in trouble for not having told my insurance at the time? As I said it's not a super urgent job and with the quote given, if it were me I'd just pay it instead of having a claim on my insurance and my premium going up. So that's why I want to be reasonable because she's not said she won't pay just hasn't committed to paying either. Question im stuck on is how long would you give her to come up with the money?
Just go to your insurance.
RealBecca · 08/09/2022 08:53
3 options really.
1Chase her, accepting she wont pay.
2 report to insurance, accepting they will raise your premiums.
3 suck up the cost.
None are nice for you. But lesson learnt.
justaladyLOL · 08/09/2022 08:55
INSURANCE
I would send a note saying if she does not agree to pay within24 hours you will instruct your insurance company
DrinkFeckArseBrick · 08/09/2022 08:57
You could tell her you need it fixed soon because you're worried about rust or something and just ask for the money at the weekend or you'll be putting in a claim on Monday
nachoavocado · 08/09/2022 08:59
Lavender14 · 08/09/2022 08:50
So she asked specifically not to go through the insurance at the start, and because we've been friendly I didn't doubt for a second that she'd pay but now it's been a few weeks- could I get in trouble for not having told my insurance at the time? As I said it's not a super urgent job and with the quote given, if it were me I'd just pay it instead of having a claim on my insurance and my premium going up. So that's why I want to be reasonable because she's not said she won't pay just hasn't committed to paying either. Question im stuck on is how long would you give her to come up with the money?
Yes that's all well and good but she hasn't sorted it. If you want to do it in a friendly a way as possible I'd say look I really need my car fixed so I'm going to have to go through insurance now as its been too long.
SpiderinaWingMirror · 08/09/2022 09:03
Just call your insurer and explain. Get the names/contact details of the witnesses just in case.
Your insurer can check if she has insurance. If you want to be neighbourly, tell her you are putting it in the hands of the insurers.
Tbf, people just don't realise how much cars cost to repair properly.
PurpleDaisies · 08/09/2022 09:05
I wouldn’t give her any time. Go through insurance. It’s the only sensible plan of action.
deeperthanallroses · 08/09/2022 09:09
just go to your insurance, message her and say I need my car fixed, I haven’t heard from you so have had to pass it onto my insurance after all, they will be in touch.
MyneighbourisTotoro · 08/09/2022 09:10
Send her a message saying if she can’t afford it to cover the damage then you are going to have to put it through your insurance, if she doesn’t reply within 24 hours call your insurance company or cover the cost yourself.
Auntieobem · 08/09/2022 09:10
Don't give her any time. Go through your insurance. I had similar experience (though was hit by a stranger). Gave them a few days to pay up, then when I went to my insurer discovered they'd submitted a claim against me!! Luckily I had lots of photos, texts from them admitting liability etc. Always go through insurance.
SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 08/09/2022 09:11
Write to her, outline the event and the dates (date it happened, date of conversations, date relative was meant to come round, date you had the quote etc) and all witnesses.
Tell her that you feel you are left with no choice but to go through insurance and she has until x date to arrange payment.
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