To be very pissed off with school

[AlbertaAnnie]

First day back at school today - school is round the corner from my house. My son is year 6 and walks to school himself ( he’s done this all last year no issues). He went to school as normal this morning and at 9.30 I revived this text from the school.
“ CHILD1 has not turned up at school today, please could you call the school immediately to update us.”
This immediate made me panic and think the worst! He’s very responsible and wouldn’t skip school so all the worst case scenario’s we’re going through my head!
Rang school in a panic shoes on ready to run over! They asked me to hold while the called his class and he was there all along but had been missed off the register! They said he must have “snuck” in past the teacher! He didn’t sneak we just went to school as normal!
anyway I know people are human and errors can happen but surely they should check before causing such alarm! I’m shocked that this isn’t standard procedure and more shocked that if he had actually been missing it would have taken them 30 mins to inform me. Spoke to head teacher and she was awful and so insincere in her apology and just came across very defensive! I want to take it further as I’m unhappy about the whole situation.
AINU to feel so angry with the school or am I being ott? Thanks!

Personally I think you're being OTT about it. Sneaking past the teacher is just a turn of phrase, no one is implying your child did it intentionally.

And if something had happened and nobody had rung you to check?

It's a bit of a non event really. Your child was in class and didn't answer his name? Or his name isn't on the register? If the latter, how did they even know to think he was absent?

If this is an isolated incident then just leave it. I appreciate it was bad of them and v stressful for you but if it’s not the kind of thing that’s happened before, put it down to a first day of school confusion and muddle, and no harm done.

I guess the office staff check the registers and then text parents? Hence the delay? As opposed to the class teacher finishing the register and then texting parents themselves? So I can see how the error happened.
You say he didn't sneak in but you don't actually know if he walked behind someone else as the teacher was distracted and thus got missed. Do they not do call out register any more?
Jack, yes Miss
Josh, here Miss
Jules. Jules. No Jules? He's here Miss. Jules pay attention please!

Who do you want to complain about? The teacher filling the register in wrong? The office trusting the register? The head teacher for not being apologetic enough?

I totally get why you were upset and worried but I think the adrenaline is making you unreasonable.

What do you expect them to do, it was a mistake, they apologised, get over it

I wouldn’t get upset about this. He’s there, all good. Better to be safe than sorry!

You want them to personally check every absentee, but take less than 30 mins to let parents know?

Its mildly annoying, but mistakes happen.

I'd be annoyed in your shoes but not to the point of angry and making complaints

This was the process when I was at school, so seems to be the norm for parents to be contacted before clarification is gained from the classroom

Which is weird but hey ho

Human error. You had a bit of a worry for a few minutes, it's over. All is well. I'm not sure what you want from the school, you have had an apology, and they may have been defensive if you pursued it beyond what might have been reasonable.

The register is "the check", they don't check the check with a second register.

I often used to get these if the school bus was late or they were on a trip.

Being OTT had several of these texts which are often automated if register done online. Every time called school who have double checked and dc is sitting in class like an angel. Yes worries you especially 1st time but I wouldn't get too upset about it.

Nothing wrong with being pissed off at the momentary heart stop till you found out all was ok, but completely unreasonable to keep it going!
used to happen at my kids’ school regularly, you do stop panicking when it’s happened for the 47th time!

I’m shocked that this isn’t standard procedure and more shocked that if he had actually been missing it would have taken them 30 mins to inform me

Shocked that what isn't standard procedure? The assumption would be that he wasn't there as he was unwell and you had forgotten to let school know. School aren't going to call the parents of every absent child as soon as the day starts just in case they've been in an accident/kidnapped. I think 30 minutes is fine to account for children just being a bit late or parents forgetting to call

He was fine, stop making such a fuss. If you're that concerned then walk him to school yourself

The worst that happened here was you were worried for a few minutes. They followed all their procedures to contact parents if child didn’t show up and your child was never actually at risk. Why would office staff go and double check a child was absent before phoning parents - it’s quite reasonable to rely on the register. And it’s quite human and normal for your child’s teacher to make a small mistake.

I’d chalk it up to “shit happens” and move on. But if you really want to take it further then follow the school complaints process. It’s unlikely to generate more than another apology though.

My child is y6 doesn’t walk to school yet by himself. He does coming home but I just don’t trust the school to let me know if he hasn’t turned up.
i know that might sound crazy but they are so disorganised and I can imagine the message not getting through to me until break! Just not worth my worry or the risk.
He doesn’t have a phone yet but will feel happier once he does and tracking is switched on!

I'd be cross too and I'm the one that makes the calls. The register is a legal document and has to be accurate but...... mistakes happen and your son is OK
If it happened again I'd moan but a one off is just that
Bloody panic inducing for everyone though
When it works , it works well

I've had it where a kid has gone to the toilet (without asking) and been ages so has missed the register. Worse is it I accidentally mark someone in because someone else has said yes to the wrong name in the register but thankfully always noticed - that one could have actual ramifications if a child was marked present but had slipped school etc

I wouldn't be impressed, personally.. just glad for you that all is ok.
My youngest came back with the rest of his class a few years ago, from a school trip. He'd fallen asleep on the coach, no-one missed him, & he ended up back at the coach's garage.
One of the men there had to run him home. He was 5 or 6 & has ASD. Everyone seemed to think it was hilarious. I did NOT.

You're being OTT

9:30 is pretty good going to be notified. If you need to be notified earlier then I think you might need to still walk him to school. Wait until secondary....
it is much better they notify and then check as it gave you the chance to say he should be there. If they check all the absences first before notifying then you wouldn't have known until much later.

They called the register, for some reason your ds was missed off - was in the loo, not listening, teacher error etc. It happens.

Standard procedure is to return registers to office, check against incoming sick-day calls, then text parents. Which is what happened.

Why the outrage?

tnh I see this as a sign of systems working more than anything to complain about.

Being OTT. Calm down. There is error in every system- because,there are humans in every system.

This happened to me in year 7. After the initial panic we knew it was a mistake. I would rather they where overcautious and have this happen then only find out a child is missing at hometime.

I think this is a lot worse, especially because the child is much younger and was out of school in the school’s care. Wouldn’t have found that funny either!