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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Teachers on Facebook and night out

333 replies

GreenGreenGrassBlue · 03/09/2022 08:45

I’ve name changed for this, my friend was showing me photos of her children’s SLT (Dep Heads, other teachers) out on a night out in a City. She’s friends with one of the Teachers on Facebook.

There are photos of them enjoying a night out, doing shots etc and this Teacher is friends with a number of parents on Facebook.

AIBU to think it’s probably not appropriate to share these sort of photos on Facebook?

It is titled like a pre back to work night out with a number of parents commenting things like ‘are you ready?’.

Im not saying don’t go out but not sure how appropriate it is for teachers to be sharing like this on Facebook.

OP posts:
feckoffbrian · 03/09/2022 09:43

Mrsuntidy · 03/09/2022 09:36

Another teacher bashing thread. Yawn. Teachers have a life outside of school! I'm a teacher and do post photos of cocktails regularly. I don't have parents on FB but who knows - one day I may teach a child whose parent is a FB friend. Should I stop posting them?

This.

I do teach children of friends. As adults, we manage to still function and no one clutches at their pearls.

Two of them are also my drinking buddies

YABVVVU

ForTheLoveOfSleep · 03/09/2022 09:43

Did they take the pupils out with them? If no then you are being unreasonable. Teachers are allowed a social life. They are people too.

They also deserve not to have uptight parents stalking their social media so they can pick them apart even more than they already do concerning in school issues.

Vecnasnurse · 03/09/2022 09:44

Although saying that, it did feel weird running into dds teacher in Tesco. It can feel quite discombobulating seeing teachers out in the wild!

Original poster
GreenGreenGrassBlue · 03/09/2022 09:44

SoupDragon · 03/09/2022 09:36

Your "friend" was showing other people's private Facebook images to people without access to them. She is the one in the wrong, not the teachers.

have a think about whether you'd be happy with her sharing your private business with strangers.

Show quote history

Never thought about it like this! However I don’t post a lot on Facebook. I’m not a huge SM person. Except mumsnet and whatsapp. I use Facebook to access local selling/buying pages etc.

I don’t think my friend was being bitchy she was more like oh we want to go to this place Miss so and so from my kids school went with her team. She showed me photos of them eating, doing shots etc and I was like oh these are your teachers?!

OP posts:
DobbyHasASock · 03/09/2022 09:45

Being photographed next to a pole is not an offence.
I have a colleague who is a pole fitness instructor as well as teacher. Her last competition was filled with staff complimenting her, some of whom have children at the school.
Seeing her do amazing tricks actually encouraged one of the children to not quit gymnastics.

BungleandGeorge · 03/09/2022 09:45

I agree the problem isn’t the photos but the being fb friends with current parents

Marvellousmadness · 03/09/2022 09:46

@IthinkIsawahairbrushbackthere you'd be upset if a friend shared photos or details from things you put on social media? 🤣 do you really think that never happens? Of course it does. Even friends do that
Doesnt make them bad friends but it is just the reality of a social media profile.

SoupDragon · 03/09/2022 09:47

GreenGreenGrassBlue · 03/09/2022 09:44

Never thought about it like this! However I don’t post a lot on Facebook. I’m not a huge SM person. Except mumsnet and whatsapp. I use Facebook to access local selling/buying pages etc.

I don’t think my friend was being bitchy she was more like oh we want to go to this place Miss so and so from my kids school went with her team. She showed me photos of them eating, doing shots etc and I was like oh these are your teachers?!

Show quote history

Well, would you be happy with her sharing your WhatsApp conversations?

flyingant · 03/09/2022 09:47

Do you feel the same about parents sharing pictures of nights out? Because if it's influence you're worried about, parents have far more influence on their own children.

Original poster
GreenGreenGrassBlue · 03/09/2022 09:47

DobbyHasASock · 03/09/2022 09:45

Being photographed next to a pole is not an offence.
I have a colleague who is a pole fitness instructor as well as teacher. Her last competition was filled with staff complimenting her, some of whom have children at the school.
Seeing her do amazing tricks actually encouraged one of the children to not quit gymnastics.

I wasn’t aware of a pole in any of the photos!

OP posts:
Marvellousmadness · 03/09/2022 09:47

"Being photographed next to a pole is not an offence."
Not it isnt

But boy it is NOT school appropriate. Haha. Here kids watch miss smith do a pole trick. 😅

Maireas · 03/09/2022 09:47

Vecnasnurse · 03/09/2022 09:44

Although saying that, it did feel weird running into dds teacher in Tesco. It can feel quite discombobulating seeing teachers out in the wild!

Just approach us gently, keeping your hands visible. A small snack could be useful. No flash photography.

VickyEadieofThigh · 03/09/2022 09:48

Dadaya · 03/09/2022 08:49

It’s called maintaining a professional image. People like teachers, doctors, and other professionals are expected to keep their private life private. It’s a sackable offence if you don’t.

Retired headteacher here. Your statement is not correct.

Misconduct can be a sackable offence but having a night out and posting what sound like fairly innocuous photos on facebook is not misconduct. It's not advisable, but that's still not misconduct. As someone says, they could have been out and seen in person by parents - but teachers are allowed a life.

I can tell you some examples of things that do constitute misconduct, if you like...

MrsHamlet · 03/09/2022 09:48

I'm friends on social media with parents of current students. I was their friend in life before they had their children. Being friends on social media isn't the problem.

Russell19 · 03/09/2022 09:49

Dadaya · 03/09/2022 08:49

It’s called maintaining a professional image. People like teachers, doctors, and other professionals are expected to keep their private life private. It’s a sackable offence if you don’t.

It isn't

EleanorShellstrop28 · 03/09/2022 09:50

Dadaya · 03/09/2022 08:49

It’s called maintaining a professional image. People like teachers, doctors, and other professionals are expected to keep their private life private. It’s a sackable offence if you don’t.

Mental. As a teacher I can guarantee you I won’t be sacked if I share photos on my Facebook of me being a normal adult human and having the social life of a normal adult human 😂 having a shot and going on a night out in your free time is not sackable behaviour for goodness sake.

Or do you think that teachers should all have to stay inside all the time in case they accidentally bump into a parent or student outside of school and the parents/students are forced to confront the horrifying fact that the teachers also have personal lives?

It is not like they’re stripping on tables in clubs for goodness sake. They had a few drinks. Madness. Z

gardenooh · 03/09/2022 09:51

It's inappropriate to 'friend' teachers who probably felt they couldn't refuse and then police them!

RockingMyFiftiesNot · 03/09/2022 09:51

There's a huge difference between being friends with people you only know because they teach your child (can't imagine any teacher accepting a friend request on that basis) and someone who is a friend who happens to be a teacher.

Teachers are allowed to have a private life and to use social media. People who are friends with them should respect their privacy and not be showing other people.

Many professions, mine included, have social media and general behaviour policies that do include what you do outside of work, But that wouldn't include a few drinks and shots when out with friends. Posting that they had had 20 pints on a Sunday night then driving into work and being unlikely to be on top form might be a different matter.

Seriously, there's a shortage of teachers as it is. Asking people to sign up to never post pictures of enjoying themselves would be ridiculous.

Ithinkthatisenoughnowthanks · 03/09/2022 09:51

Unprofessional of a teacher having parents of students as friends on Facebook

You know teachers don't live in a vacuum and that they can have friends who have children, right?

DobbyHasASock · 03/09/2022 09:51

I was referring to another post.
But while I have your attention yabbvvvvu and judgemental.

Rosiethecat15 · 03/09/2022 09:55

MessyBunPersonified · 03/09/2022 08:49

What's inappropriate about a teacher having a night out?

Nothing at all, but then there is nothing at all wrong with facebook privacy settings either.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 03/09/2022 09:55

Wait … do teachers not live in the school and sleep in the teacher’s lounge?!

No, they sleep in the stationery cupboard Wink

And of course there's nothing wrong with a night out, but does everything really have to be plastered all over Facebook and the like, and too often without privacy settings?
My own ex, idiot though he was, wouldn't even shower at the gym in case a pupil was there and went home with a story about "I've seen Mr Puzzled's willy!!"
With some parents that really is all it would take ...

vroom321 · 03/09/2022 09:55

Who would want their kids teachers to be a friend? to see their profile? God I moaned about my kids non stop on there. I'd hate for a teacher to see that.

I know lots of teachers / nurses on Facebook they use their first and middle names only so they can't be traced via their surname.

Creameggs223 · 03/09/2022 09:56

They are human and allowed to have fun in whatever way they see fit aslong as its all legal, absolutely no way would I have any parent on my social media for this reason.

Russell19 · 03/09/2022 09:56

OP you'd have a heart attack if you saw my teaching team on a night out! And the head teacher is the worst! 🤣