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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to manage the afternoons a bit better?

56 replies

Needmilk · 02/09/2022 17:17

On the days I work, I’m generally home with DS by 4/430. He goes up for his bath at 630, so we have around two hours to fill.

He is generally a bit grumpy and tired after nursery (he is 2 in November) so actual structured activities are out, but he’s hard work at this time … how do others manage it?

OP posts:
Howeverdoyouneedme · 02/09/2022 17:20

I would go round the supermarket with him in the pushchair then get CBeebies on for a bit if he won’t play.

Tomorrowisalatterday · 02/09/2022 17:22

I find the afternoons are difficult. I would consider picking him up a bit later to be honest - might give you a bit of time to yourself as well

willowtree00 · 02/09/2022 17:23

Whizz over to the nearest park with a ball or something for a kick about and a wander? I found myself doing that this afternoon as a bit of a time filler with my 20MO

itsgettingweird · 02/09/2022 17:25

I'd do dinner, some tv and then bathtime.

If you do dinner at 5 and then watched tv until 6 whilst you tidy up it gives you time when he's in bed to sit down!

Original poster
Needmilk · 02/09/2022 17:27

He has his dinner at nursery Smile

We can go to the park sometimes but soon it will be getting dark and the weather isn’t always great.

trying to avoid screen time!

OP posts:
A580Hojas · 02/09/2022 17:33

He has his last meal of the day before 4? That doesn't sound right?

JuneOsborne · 02/09/2022 17:35

What time is his nursery dinner if you're home with him from 4??

NoSquirrels · 02/09/2022 17:38

If you’re home between 4-4.30, he can’t be having his full dinner at nursery, he’ll need a snack/supper, won’t he? I’d definitely think about picking him up later e.g. 5pm. I always found the rushing out of work on the dot stressful and being able to have another 45 minutes to set up for the next day would be so valuable. Or even - shocker! - time to go for gym or swim? I’d have loved that, and if he’s not FT nursery you get whole days with him so no guilt.

HandbagAtDawn · 02/09/2022 17:39

Does he have dinner at nursery or high tea? Our nursery used to give the kids mini sandwiches and some fruit around 4pm with the expectation that they would be eating a proper dinner at home.

They had to send an email to parents clarifying this because they were getting complaints that the kids were waking up hungry in the middle of the night!

ThreeRingCircus · 02/09/2022 17:40

Mine have dinner at home, granted a "light" meal as they get fed at 3.30pm at nursery (or a little later at after school club.) But as an example my 3 year old had a toasted teacake for tea at nursery at 3.30pm and is currently eating some toast and fruit before her bath. There is no way they could have their tea at nursery and then stretch until bedtime, are you sure they're not hungry?!

In all honesty they're usually tired out after nursery/school/after school club so they come home and watch some TV as they need downtime then a quick and easy meal, drink of milk, read a story and bath and bedtime.

Original poster
Needmilk · 02/09/2022 17:40

Nursery dinner (they call it tea) is at 330. They seem to have their main meal at lunch time. So today he had sausage, mash and peas followed by yoghurt, then beans on toast for tea.

I don’t really want to pick him up any later, it’s quite a long day as it is.

OP posts:
Original poster
Needmilk · 02/09/2022 17:41

He does have snacks before bed, but there’s no way he’d want a full meal.

OP posts:
BertieBotts · 02/09/2022 17:42

Afternoons after nursery are pure wind down nothing time here. We get home approx 4:30 - 5ish.

Snack as soon as you get in.

TV and/or easy, predictably popular toys - Brio train track is a hit here or all the buses/cars.

Make an easy/quick/snacky dinner

Maybe a bit of dancing/tidy up song before bath.

Original poster
Needmilk · 02/09/2022 17:44

I’m really trying to avoid the TV. I suppose I was wondering if there were any low key activities anyone has any ideas for? I mean, even if we get home at 430, that’s still two hours of television before bed, which isn’t ideal really.

OP posts:
BertieBotts · 02/09/2022 17:44

There is no harm in screentime as downtime. It's when it's replacing other activities it's an issue.

Anon50000 · 02/09/2022 17:45

I'd just go down the snack,TV, play with toys route. Perhaps a play in the garden if the weathers ok.

midgetastic · 02/09/2022 17:49

Read a book
Colour a picture
Help mammy tidy up

IceStationZebra · 02/09/2022 17:50

BertieBotts · 02/09/2022 17:44

There is no harm in screentime as downtime. It's when it's replacing other activities it's an issue.

This. My DC is only a few months older than yours but a bit of screen time is fine for them to wind down. Jigsaws and Brio/cars available too so there wasn’t a fixation on the screen, but it allowed me to get on with dinner prep for all of us (I pick up at 5-5.30 though)

The two hours can drag a bit - they don’t call it the witching hour for nothing - but they don’t need over-stimulating.

Tomorrowisalatterday · 02/09/2022 17:53

Longer bath? Potentially more bath toys might help? Mine can spend aaaages in the bath

Moominmammacat · 02/09/2022 17:56

Music ... something familiar to put the dolls to bed with.

ShirleyPhallus · 02/09/2022 17:59

We often sit in the playroom and read stories on a big beanbag for a while then play with blocks / trains etc or go straight in to the garden

but I’d agree with the others, pick up a bit later and give him 30/45 mins of ceebeebies

Undermearmour · 02/09/2022 18:00

When my kids were younger, it usually was a case of get some toys out to have a play, have tea around 5pm and then have a bit of telly on in the background. Sometimes we would do a walk for some fresh air or like others have said, bring bath time forwards a bit and make play time out it.

It sounds like everyone is knackered after a long day at nursery and work. Don't make it harder on yourself trying to be Mary Poppins. Accept your child is happy spending time with you regardless of how mundane it is and just relax and enjoy it for what it is.

Original poster
Needmilk · 02/09/2022 18:00

Two hours is too much though @BertieBotts , and he wouldn’t engage with it for that length of time anyway.

It is hard, as obviously books for this age group aren’t two hours of a job! But I really don’t want to be in the habit of two hours of TV three days a week!

OP posts:
BertieBotts · 02/09/2022 18:03

We just kind of have the TV on as background and I find they tend to potter and play with their cars/trains/other things with it in the background.

Sometimes if DH is home and has energy he will lie on the floor and let them climb on him.

You don't have to do TV of course but I find it just helps and I don't feel guilty about it.

LASandOtto · 02/09/2022 18:05

Similar pick up time and we usually also have 2 hours or so before bedtime.

No screen time here (yet), DD is almost 2.

We usually walk home, then we typically read or look at several books together. I recently got gifted an Animals 'jigsaw' (for toddlers) which we piece together. Sometime we just put music on, sing songs and have a little dance. Other options are playing lego or we get her crayons out and she colours stuff in on white paper or in drawing books.

I also get her to help me do some house chores, either put a wash on, or take dry washing off the airer and into the basket, or unload the dishwasher, that sort of thing.

We do have a light meal around 6-6.30pm as she will eat something despite having dinner at nursery at 4pm.

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